*The next few chapters are happier memories but they hurt to remember, but for this to make sense I'm going to have to add them, and I have to talk about it somewhere. Sorry if the writing is overly detailed in some moments or no detail in others*
I rode in the car, my excitement... Not very high. I was going to a Christmas party thing. Grace (an old friend) Abigail, Mason, and his older brother Jason were going to be there. Which I wouldn't mind normally, but I was emotionally drained and I couldn't find a long enough sleeved shirt, so I had to bandage my wrist.
Now, I've learned that if you have one bandaid on and you act like it's no big deal, people don't even ask about it. But when your wrist is literally so wrapped up that it makes it about an inch thicker- well, that's when people stop and wonder. Which drives me insane because self harm is serious no matter if it's one scratch or if you almost bleed out. People should ALWAYS stop and make sure you're okay. But you have to be the change you want to see. I always check people's wrists and ask if they are okay. If they want to talk. Sometimes just talking helps, knowing someone cares. Believe it or not, just drawing a butterfly on their wrist helps.
No ones ever done that for me.
"Hi, what're you doing today?" Flashed onto my screen. There's only been two people who've really stayed (as in, not died and not left me) and that's Grace and Hayley. Hayley is the one who texted me. I put my phone into my pocket and got out of the car after my mom parked, feeling guilt settle in my stomach. We hadn't been as close as usual lately. These thoughts were soon forgotten as I entered the building and saw Abigail.
"What happened to your wrist?" Jason asked.
"DUDE, no!" Abigail said. I felt my face heat up slightly before quickly saying the story I'd gone over in my head.
"My dog Sammy was under the bushes and he wouldn't come out, so I was trying to get him out and the leaves scratched me." Jason made a face as if to say 'ouch'.
"Yeah, she sent me pictures of him under there, crazy thing," Abigail added, catching on. Jason nodded and went back to talking to a guy friend. I mouthed 'thank you' to her when no one was looking.
'You're welcome' she mouthed back.
She had seemed really happy that day, pouncing around in the woods behind the building. At some point we stood at the edge of a hill, and she ran down it, collapsing at the bottom. I laughed and ran down the hill with her. Grace didn't follow but when I looked back I could see that one eyebrow was raised. She knew I never ran. Ever. And yet here I was. Running.
I reached the bottom and stared at Abigail, her red hair spread about her.
"It doesn't seem like a very good idea to lay in the mud," I joked. She just shrugged. That's when I realized that something was wrong. I slowly lowered myself down to the ground and she got up in a sitting position.
"What's wrong?" I asked her softly.
"My sister broke her arm.." She sighed. "Again. And my parents are running out of money to pay for that." I tried to come up with what to say.
"I'm sorry," I finally said to her.
"It's okay," she smiled. "You're lucky you don't have siblings." I shrugged and smiled back.
"I used to." I told her.
"Twin brothers. I had twin brothers. They were older though, I never got to meet them." Abigail frowned.
"What happened?" She asked.
"They died at birth, that's all.." I trailed off before saying. "Your siblings really love and look up to you, and you're lucky to have them. So lucky." We talked for a bit, before she said, "I'm sorry that I said that to Jason." I gave her a real smile.
"Eh, it's okay. They'd never guess." My head lowered and I looked at my hands as if they were deeply interesting, and then we just sat there, her forehead and mine resting on each other. That's when I realized she was my best friend.
Months passed and they were the best months of my life. I drew out my sadness, I wrote it out and it helped. When Abigail or I were upset we'd comfort each other, and I knew it could be 2:00 in the morning and I still would. I discovered the best bands in the world, with the most amazing lyrics I've ever listened to. I learned about Of Mice & Men, Pierce the Veil, and Sleeping with Sirens. I never thought it would end- and defiantly not by the one I trusted the most.