I felt lighter and completely free of Abigail. I sat talking to my mom about it, slowly going over it. Getting over it.
"It's weird, but Hayley has been there for you," my mom said and she was right. She had. Since I was seven. Maybe even six.
"You're right, she has been.." I said. "She didn't leave me and I pushed her away." She came back though, as soon as I tried again she was right there. I was so grateful. I mean, really, she-
"Oh yeah, I've been meaning to tell you." My mom said plainly. "She's moving." I felt my stomach drop. My mom said it so off handed, like it was just an every day thing to say.
"Where?" I asked. Maybe it wasn't far. Maybe-
My mouth was dry. How could she just say it? Like that?
It was halfway across the country. I stood up, the floor going out from under me- or so it felt like. I slowly climbed the stairs. I fell onto the floor with a small sigh.
Me: my mom just told me. That you were moving.
I messages it carefully. Exactly word for word with what I thought she might need to hear. Not for me.
Me: yes, I'm sorry that you are, but it will be okay. :)
Hayley: yeah... I'm glad I have someone to talk to now.
She was a big emoji fan. There was eighty after each text. And never dots. I knew she was upset. So I let her talk to me about it, she needed me to be they for her. I may have been crying myself, but it wasn't all about me.
Hayley: you're taking this a lot better than I am
But the truth was, I wasn't. Not really. I was just there for her. That's all. And maybe I kind of wished someone would hug me. But that wasn't the point because I only have two arms and I would hug my own self later. I cried, and cried, and silently knew that she wasn't crying. I tried to give the best advice. I tried to tell her she needed to cry. But she wouldn't just like couldn't stop. So, that's life. Sometimes you need to be there for someone and stop being there for yourself because they did the same for you once.