“Hey! Will you come to get some dinner with us or not?” Brenda asked.
“I’m on my way!” I forgot about the plans I had with my friend for my last night on New York. Damn!
“Hurry up! We’re starving.”
I hung up the phone, took my hoodie and left.
They were waiting for me at 230 fifth, and I was kind of late but it didn’t matter so much. I got in time before they would start eating.
“Hey! I’m sorry, guys… I didn’t catch up about time.”
“It’s okay, we’ve just ordered… Where’s Nick?” Bren asked when I took a seat right beside her.
“Um… He’s… I-I don’t know.” I accepted. I look at my hands under the table; they were sweating.
“Is everything, okay?” Adam asked this time.
“Babe, you mind if…”
“I’ll go to restroom. Don’t worry.” Thank god he understood what Bren said and stoop up.
“I-It… It kinda happened again. You know… The kissing and touching but I just stopped it and he didn’t even know what to say so he left and now I’m right here-”
“Oh no! You didn’t!” She began to whisper a little roughly interrupting my speech. “Once, like a crime for them and there you go and- No! Girl, you’re… Arg!”
“I’m sorry… It’s just that… I-I…” I stuttered my apologize.
“You must stop.” Brenda said. “It’s not fair for any of you.”
I sighed and closed my eyes for a minute.
“I’m sorry, girls. But there’s a guy inside that’s freaking me out.” Adam suddenly said behind me.
We giggled and the dinner arrived.
“Hey, you’ve order for me. Not fair.” I complained.
We changed the subject and began to eat whatever they had ordered for me but I couldn’t handle the flashbacks about Nick and I a few moments ago. Yes, I know… I should’ve got over it but I couldn’t!
We spent most of the night at the restaurant just talking. Around midnight they walked me home and said goodbye hoping everything would get better with Nick.
I rushed to get in the apartment; I wasn’t really tired but for some reason all I wanted to do was going to bed and Nick hadn’t arrived yet so I decided to get some sleep and forget about everything at least for a few hours; I wanted to talk to Nick before leaving…
The next morning, I woke up and there was no one by my side. I looked for Nick and found him on a chair near the table with his hands together on his lap and his eyes closed.
There was a killing silence around us. The kind of silence you try to ignore by listening to your own thoughts.
“Nick?” I called him. He didn’t say anything but sighed. “Are you okay, baby?”
“Yes.” He said without looking at me. “I just need to talk to you.”
I sat down on a chair next to his and tried to grab his hand, but he simply took it off.
“What’s going on?”
“I-I think…” He cleared his throat and tensed my nerves. “I think we need a break.”
We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… I repeated to myself at least 10 times before catching what he was saying. We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break…
I stopped my breathing for a second trying to make sure that my heart was still beating and I wasn’t in the middle of a nightmare.
I stood up looking at my feet still in shock.
“Fine.” I said biting my lip. “I’ll grab my stuff to go to the airport.”
I went to the room and changed my clothes with his words still on my mind… WHO WOULDN’T REPEAT THEM TO KNOW IF YOU WERE LISTENING?
We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break…
I was about to take my suitcase from the floor when Nick got in.
“I’ll take you to the air-.”
“No, thank you. I can take a cab.” You might say I’m crazy, or insane, or stupid but I couldn’t felt a single thing! I was trying to feel a whole in my chest, my heart racing as hell, my lungs being flooded with pain… but I couldn’t even felt sadness or anger… ANYTHING!
Just his echoed in my mind.
We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break… We need a break…
“I just have to ask for the car an-“
“No.” I repeated and turned to face him. My eyes were on the wall behind him, if I had seen his eyes I would lose my sanity. “It’s fine. Actually, you have done so much for me but keeping a single promise.”
“Don’t say you’re sorry, because I know you’re not. You’re not sorry for this, after all I’m just another ordinary girl who fell in love with a superstar who would never catch her because of real feelings.” The ‘spitting stupid words’ began to appear again. ”Bren was right! You’re just like every single guy that only looks for sex and nothing else!”
“You are not as different as I thought or maybe it’s like you have always said… People change and promises-”
“You’re wrong! Is jus-” He cut his own words.
“It’s just that… YOU need a break.”