Minecraft: The Marvelous Misadventures of Steve

Steve wakes up in a strange world where everything is made of blocks. Follow him as he tries to survive, fight evil beasts, and discover how he came here and what his purpose is.


6. Nether Again

Steve toiled away in his mine, going through dozens of iron pickaxes. At last, when the last of pickaxe's strength gave out, he found it. Diamonds. He pulled out a new pickaxe and mined it up. He excavated more around the small vein, finding more and more diamond until he had a full set of armor, and a sword and pickaxe. He found a huge ravine with dozens of blocks of obsidian. He finally had enough to build a nether portal.

He walked down to the village library, scanning the shelves for what he wanted. He found an old, leather-bound book with yellow and crinkly pages. It had vivid illustrations of blocky people creating a rectangular frame made of obsidian. Steve read the precise amount blocks of blocks needed and how to place them. He had dug out a small cave-like room deep beneath his castle. Following the instructions of the book, he built the obsidian frame. He pulled out his flint and steel and struck it against the bottom part of the frame. After almost an hour of striking without any sparks, he activated the portal. Purple, swirling liquid-like mass formed in the middle. Steve grabbed his sword, bow, and pickaxe. He took a deep breath and walked into the portal.

The purple mass entered his mouth, nostrils, and ears. It felt horrible. He screamed as the cave spun and gradually was overtaken by the purple. He gasped as he fell out of the portal in an entirely different landscape. There was a massive lava ocean next a beach made of red rock and gravel. There were the fabled zombie pigmen wandering the fields of rock. The old butcher often spoke of them to wide-eyed young children. Pink pig flesh was scarce, grey-green zombie skin making up most of the body. Half of their heads were uncovered skulls. In their hand was a golden sword. Steve also saw huge white octopus things over the ocean. It fired a fireball at him.

"Holy crap!" screamed Steve. He jumped to the side, not noting there was no ground there. He fell down to the ground, flailing around hopelessly. He grabbed a small piece of rock that was jutting out and held on with both hands. His pickaxe escaped his grasp and fell down, bouncing off the walls of the pit. Steve carefully climbed down to retrieve it. He found it resting on a platform made dark purple brick. He dropped down and grabbed his pickaxe. He broke a single block and went inside. The platform was a roof a massive fortress made of nether brick. He wandered through, making sure to follow the "torches on the right" rule. He found a stairway that lead to an open-air part if the fortress. In the center was a cage with a creature swirling inside of it. A full-size version climbed through the cage bars and looked right into Steve's eyes. It promptly threw a fireball at him. It slammed into the block in front of Steve and blew him backwards. Steve grabbed his sword and sliced at the beast, matching the destruction of the "Blaze" the butcher told about. He hacked and chopped, missing every time. The blaze shot a another fireball, knocking the blade out of his hand. Steve, using common sense, threw a snowball in the blaze's face. It fell over, and burned up, a blaze rod taking its place. Steve picked it up. He killed seventy-six blazes before he ran out of snowballs.

Steve happily found his way back to the portal. Another white octopus-thing attacked him. Steve fired an arrow at it, but since he was a horrible shot, it hit a zombie pigmen, which sent two dozen more pigmen chasing after him. He ran into the portal, bearing the scratches from their swords. He fell backward into the cave he made, and covered the portal with TNT. When he heard the moans of the pigmen that came in after him, he lit the TNT off and ran away into his castle.

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