Always. It's a strong word. It can mean a lot, like how it meant to me when Niall told me he'd always love me. It can be a word that means nothing, like how it meant to Niall when he said he'd always love me. And then the next day, he left Mullingar and never came back. And I was alone. Always.


4. London, Finally

Once the plane landed, I got my luggage out of the panels above me, and grabbed my purse on the way out. I had to get a rental car to drive to the apartment.

I had already bought a room the day before, so now I just had to check in.

I arrived at the apartment in about thirty minutes, and I got out of the rental car and took my luggage inside.

"Hello. How may I help you?" The man at the front desk asked me when I got to him.

"Oh, I'm Clover Connors. I will be staying in room 5A." He typed something in his computer and smiled, apparently meaning he'd found me.

"Here you go, ma'am." He handed me a room key and a lanyard to put it on. I thanked him and got into the elevator. I thought floor A would be the bottom floor, but, strangely, it was the top floor. When the elevator 'ding'ed, meaning it had arrived at my floor, I got off and found my room.

I had never been in an apartment before, but I imagined they'd be like a hotel room. This one? Not at all. It had a complete kitchen with an oven, pantry, and everything. Two TVs, and queen-size bed (Better than my twin bed at home! Yup, you heard me right!), the shower could even change settings!

My favorite part was the balcony. I imagine the mornings when I'd be able to wake up and watch the sunrise with a cup of tea, or the evenings when I could relax in a chair out there and see the sun set. I smiled at this thought.

I went into my room and started unpacking. Then, I thought of something.

The whole reason I came here.


Call him.


I was fighting with my conscience.

Call him.



No. Shut up, conscience. I continued unpacking. My heart skipped a beat when my phone rang, since I had just been thinking about calling someone. But when I looked at the caller I.D. I saw my cousin Nessa's picture pop up. I answered the call, wondering why she had wanted to speak with me.


"Clover? Is it you?"

"Yeah. Nessa, it's been so long."

"I know!" She laughed. "So, I heard you moved to London."

"Who told you?" Really, there was nobody who knew except for my dad and I.

"Your dad," She said. What? "We're cousins, remember?" She laughed. "He called my mom to tell her, and she called me. I was so happy since I moved here two years ago! Wanna meet up?" She asked.

"Oh, sure. That'd be great."

"Hey, maybe we could grab ice cream at Gelupo. It's on Archer Street." I agreed once she gave me further directions.

I got changed into some white skinny jeans, a light blue cardigan over a white tank top, and some light blue flats. Then I drove my rental car to Gelupo and got out and went inside.

I saw Nessa at a table and she waved me over. "Clover!" She exclaimed, standing up. "You're so... pretty! Last time we saw eachother, you were ten and I was eight!" We hadn't seen eachother since my mum died. Since it was Nessa's mum's sister, and Nessa's mum didn't know my dad very well, we kind of lost touch.

"I know, and you're pretty too." I replied, smiling. She wrapped me in a hug and then we sat down, chatting away. Suddenly, I didn't feel very alone anymore. I didn't even need Niall. Take that, conscience.



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