Although I had a late night, I wake early. Eager to begin my new life. Arios lies beside me, still asleep. It is an odd thing to behold, never before have I seen him look so peaceful.
I slide my arms back round him and lean my head just under his. My place. Being near him is so pleasant, I'm sure I'll never be able to spend another hour apart. I listen to his breathing as if it's an intricate piece of music. However simple, it is equally as beautiful. He is so alive. Even sleeping he is bursting with energy, it seems to radiate off of him and give a brilliant glow to anything lucky enough to be near.
But then he wakes and, a usual, it is straight down to business. Now the peace has left him and it's obvious he's troubled.
“I know it's not been long but there's so much we need to discuss. I was really hoping I could put this off but there's really not enough time. We may be happy together, wanting to forget all else, but the world outside remains unchanged. Much as I hate to remind you, we still haven't solved the problems we both set out to solve. To put it simply, Binnin still rules. You and I have both witnessed first hand the troubles that come along with that. At heart you are still REFORMATION, but now the dreams of so many have fallen to you alone.”
Consumed by my own joy, I had forgotten the sufferings of those back home. Even forgot the mission I very nearly surrendered my life for. Still, I have a chance to go back and finish what I started.
Maybe there is even still a chance to save my friends. It is not certain they have been killed. The least I can do is try. I owe them that much.
“Will you help me?”
“You do realize I'd do anything for you?” I take that as a yes. I suppose Arios can work as Dr. Gurion, although his long absence may have raised some suspicions. Hopefully the information he managed to procure before will be enough, he may struggle to regain his colleagues trust.
“You don't waste any time do you? This is the most unromantic way to start married life imaginable.”
“Or you could look at it as shared project, a common goal, team building even. Take this is proof I will do anything for you. I mean, I'm hardly keen to go back to that outrageous country but I believe you've made a promise to yourself. And as your husband, I am here to help you keep it.” - How does he make peril and probable death sound so appealing?
Only three days since my wedding and I am already preparing to leave my new home. Now I have found true happiness, I am more afraid of dieing. I have at last found something I don't want to lose. As much as I used to despise fear, this I am glad of. Being afraid of death means I must love life. I have found the life I love.
I'm not sure what the plan is. To be honest, I'm not even sure if there is a plan. Arios' confidence is so often deceiving. Even when he has no cause to be, he is confident in his abilities. Often I am left wondering if he actually knows what on earth he's doing.
We are to leave in a week, we would go sooner but obviously we need to keep things sweet with the people here. I've been so wrapped up in the novelty of being Arios' wife, he have barely considered the fact I am now I queen.
When people 'your majesty' and 'your highness' me, I still often forget they are talking to me. I should enjoy it while I can. It's also hard to think of Arios as a powerful king. To me he is becoming more and more the boy I loved as a mere child. The boy who managed to capture my heart so completely, even all these years later, even unable to fully remember him, I could never snatch it back.
Spending so much time with him, occasionally I am having odd flashbacks. But with such a huge chunk of my memory gone I can't put them into any sort of context.
I've never really wondered why years are completely missing from my mind. Since I obviously can't remember anything different, I suppose I've been able to accept it.
Maybe Edward will be able to tell me; I feel bad, I haven't really spoken to him since the wedding. So much has changed so fast. Mr. Edington, (whom I so disliked) is now my dear, long lost brother, Eddie. Funny how the things we desire in life come from the most unexpected places.
I suspect the government somehow wiped my memory. If that is true, I wonder how much they have taken from others. After fulfilling my primary purpose, that of removing Binnin and his sadistic friends from power, I must find a way to retrieve those memories.
For now, however, I must focus on the main goal. It would be wise for me to use my remaining time to prepare myself in any way I can. After all I've been through, I can't underestimate the trials I will have to face.
Lottie wanted to come with us but I did not allow her. She must not put herself in danger for our cause. Lottie is free now, sending her back would be pointless. Even if we don't return, I'm sure she will be able to find happiness here. Throwing away another life will be pointless.
We sit on the transport in sombre silence. Already we have given way to despair. All at the same time, I love and hate Arios. He sticks to his duty no matter how inconvenient. As mush as I respect and admire that, however noble I think him, I still wish we could forget the rest of the world for once. To be together for a while longer, safe and content.
Ed's come with us. Not that I wanted him here any more than Lottie, the only difference is that he's far more stubborn. There really is no way to dissuade him from anything he sets his heart on.
Unlike Arios, Ed would have rather spared me from my duty. They are both protective over me but Arios knows my strength whereas Edward underestimates me. Besides, Arios puts doing the right thing above all else; Ed's morals are easier compromised when I'm involved. Especially now, naturally he's afraid to lose me again.
I am sat at the instruments; I always need to be in control. Soaring just above the atmosphere at 500mph, I feel a particular need to look after myself. Here, amid all this silence and darkness, I always feel insecure.
Ed comes and joins me, I know there's still plenty he wants to talk to me about. So much I don't remember, things he's bursting to tell me. Obviously I'm curious but I need to stay focused right now. This is no time to have my better sense and judgment washed away in gush of emotion. Sentiment will have to wait.
“Vita, are you alright? I know you must still be shocked, I knew who you were but I was pretty shocked myself when I actually met you. Do you remember that? Sorry I didn't react very well. I didn't know what to do or say. I couldn't believe you were my little sister; you were so fierce and fiery. I was actually afraid of you.
I did realize you'd have changed. I was so curios, that's why I asked for you to be brought to me. I must have made a terrible impression, what with waking you in the middle of the night like that. I didn't want everyone to see and start asking questions. Again, I'm just so sorry. No wonder you still don't want to speak to me. I was an idiot. At the same time I wanted to love you and hate you. Love you because you were my little sister and hate you because you'd changed enough to not quite be her. I was so confused and so angry that you'd been taken from me. So frustrated that you still couldn't remember me. That my beloved sister was treating me as a total stranger....”
“Forget it OK. It's all over now, I am beginning to remember more and more from our childhood. And even if I never remember it all, I will love you as much now as I ever did back then. Maybe I'll admire you even more. Because even of I'm not a little child, my experience has only shown me how life can be. Look at me, even now I'm having to be forced into doing my duty. I have so many unrealistic dreams, it is unreasonable for me to wish them fulfilled.
You on the other hand, you dreamed of rebellion, you dreamed of creating a refuge for any who refused to support a corrupt and wicked government. You dreamed of fighting for freedom. And you succeeded. I am so proud of you, So proud to call you my brother. One small mistake in the past can't change that.”
It was odd to see such an unmovable man so well... so moved! His face, usually so stern, didn't seem to know how to show whatever emotion he was feeling. He is so unused to wearing an expression. Despite the circumstances, it still made me laugh. Soon he joined me. I'm not sure why, I think it was my laughing that started him off rather than anything he found funny. I always find myself laughing if hear someone else chuckle. Even when I don't understand why they're doing it. Maybe me and my brother have found one thing we have I common. I realize how little I know about Edward.
“What's your favorite food?” He just looks at me quizzically.
“Look, it may sound random but it's a great question. Everyone has strong opinions about food. It's a good way to open a conversation.”
Again laughing, he replied, “Figglewigs, remember when we were younger and we used to eat them on the way to school. Till this day, I still haven't worked out what they put in those things.”
When I concentrated really hard, when I managed to block out all other thoughts, I could remember. It was so refreshing to get another piece of my childhood back. Those days seem to have been so beautiful, so carefree. We carried on chatting for the rest of the journey. By the end I really felt I had my brother back.