Act 1, Scene 1
In the U.F.O, the aliens are eating popcorn watching TV
Zark: I love this new Spaceship, it’s got DH quality.
Zang: I think you find it is HDD.
Zark: No it I think you will still find it is DH.
Zang: No it isn’t.
Zark: Yes it is!
Zang: Oh ok I think it is DH.
Zark: It even has popcorn and don’t even think of starting a fight in to that!
Zang: I won’t and look! And we are bang on time for Dani’s House!
Zark: That is our favourite show and McHurties Hospital.
(Looks at the screen closer)
Zark: (Confused) That’s not Dani’s House!
Zang: Isn’t it weird that it is Dani’s parents house not hers.
Zark: Shush, it’s starting and there is a surprising twist, I wonder what it is!
Zang: What is it then?!
Zark: Watch and find out!
Dani enters the house.
Dani: (Looking at the Camera) Hey guys, welcome to my new house and it is my house not my parents! They thought it was time I moved out and learned how to cope with life by myself, not with my parents that I can all ways rely on. So my parents and the baby, who is actually turning 4 tomorrow, are all gone to America! It’s so cool, come, I will show you inside.
(Enters into the kitchen and Ruby is eating a salad while Jack is eating pizza)
Dani: This is my new kitchen, and here are my best friends, Ruby and Jack. (They wave) And my boyfriend is coming in an hour. And I just wanna say, I’m Dani and this is Dani’s House.
Jack: Yeah, the real Dani’s House not like the fake one.
Dani: Oh, ha-ha-ha. And you will never guess what but I am-
Ruby: (Interrupts) going to be the lead star of McHurties Hospital.
Ruby: Sorry Dani.
Dani: Yes, as Ruby just said, I am becoming lead role in McHurties Hospital.
Jack: I still don’t get it. You are the lead role in McHurties hospital.
Dani: Yes, we stabilised that just a few minutes ago.
Ruby: But isn’t it weird.
Dani: What do you mean?
Ruby: Zarina is never nice to anyone.
Dani: She said I have really been a credit to the team and I should be head nurse.
Ruby: Who is the head doctor?
Dani: Doctor StrangeBottom.
Ruby: Yes! All those letters worked, I have spent 4 months trying to get StrangeBottom the lead role.
Dani: Thanks Ruby.
Ruby: I did also put you name in the letters I wrote.
Ruby: Only about 5. But anyway, that makes McHurties hospital not a soap; in a soap it makes all characters equal.
Dani: Yeah but Zarina said she is taking a risk which she hopes will pay off.
Ruby: Anyway, sorry for interrupting you. I just love to say it, I put it as my status on my new app I have got, BBM.
Jack: BB, what’s that?
Ruby: Well it’s an app were you can instant message anyone you like but it is only available for people with Blackberry’s.
Jack: Oh, I can just borrow Dani’s. (He points to a bunch of blackberries)
Ruby: Not that silly, Blackberry, the phone.
Jack: Well maybe I will get one.
Ruby: If you think a Blackberry is a fruit, then you won’t be able to work out the concept of it. It is really hard to explain and anyway, how could you afford it.
Jack: How could you afford it?
Ruby: Well I add all my money from my DJ-ercise classes.
Dani: And all her money from her personal trainer.
Ruby: And add all my money from working at the local shop down the road, and then I finally got enough money to get the phone.
Dani: Well you finally got the money for your top up.
Ruby: Oh yeah, then Dani gave me the rest of the money for the phone.
Jack: Still, I will get one.
Ruby: Good luck then, cause your gonna need it! Which also reminds me, I’ve got to hand out these flyers. Suddenly many people have stopped me becoming their personal trainer. I don’t know why, they said it was because I am not a nice person, which I am!
Dani: Well you do remember the time you had Adam as you gym pupil.
Ruby and Adam are at the gym. Adam is doing press ups.
Ruby: Come on!
Adam: (He stops and gets up) Ok, I did a hundred.
Ruby: Do another!
Adam: Do I have to
Ruby: (Shouting) Do it! (Adam does the press-ups)
Back to Scene 2
Jack: I will come.
Ruby: You can’t, only personally trainer allowed, I told you that at least 2647 times, from the day we met. (She leaves)
Jack: Well I am going to get my strawberry. (He leaves and closes the door.
Dani: (Looks at the camera) Well that leaves you and me. (Knock on the door) That is probably Alex, the love of my life. (She opens the door and it is Maisy, Megaboyd and Ben all really excited.)
Ben: Where is he?
Maisy: I can’t wait to see Max!
Megaboyd: How is he taking the news?
Dani: Upstairs, he’s taking it badly!
Ben: Which room upstairs?
Dani: Find him yourself. (They all run upstairs) Well I better tell you how he got there. (Talk while you walk in to the living room.) Well, he became a star, then his voice went incredibly low and he lost it as a singer so mum and dad told him he could live with me. I mean I didn’t even say he could.