Dear Journal (Larry One Shot)

Larry One Shot - Punk!Louis - Flowerchild!Harry


1. Dear Journal (Part One)

Harry Styles didn't have much friends, and when I say much I mean like one or two Not many people talk to him. Even if they were to talk to Harry it's not like he would hear them. Harry is deaf, and not many people realize it. He can read lips if they're not talking to fast and respond, which makes people think he's not deaf. But that's also the reason why Liam has to remind Niall not to talk to fast. Liam and Niall are Harry's best and only friends. He gets bullied a lot. Not because he's deaf, no. Because he's gay. The school had found out when a video was posted of him and what he thought was his boyfriend kissing. But instead it was all just one horrible joke. This made him fall into depression, and he's not sure on how many days he could last with everything that's happening. He's planning to end it soon. Unless, someone could save him.


    Louis Tomlinson was starting a new school today. He was kicked out of his mother's house after getting in trouble again at school. Louis' dad decided to help him out. His parents split long ago, when Louis got his first tattoo and his mum blamed his father. Louis looked just like his dad, precrings and tattoos included. Louis didn't mind moving away from his too perfect mum. To her, everything had to be perfect. Her hair, face, lips, nose, body, house, son. Louis didn't really count any of the people at his school as 'friends'. He didn't like people, they're just idiots. So here he is now; getting ready to go to a new school, laying on his bed wearing black skinny jeans that had a spike belt with them, a shirt that said Drop Dead, black converse's. 

    "Okay Louis, c'mon!" He heard his father yell from down stairs. He jumped up off the bed and grabbed his wallet and phone, shoving it into his pocket. He walked downstairs and his Dad smiled at him. "Why, don't you look colorful." Louis rolled his eyes but had a smile playing on his lips. He never disliked his father, just his mum.

    They walked to the his dad's mustang and got inside. Louis turned on the music and was surprised when he heard Britney Spears playing through the car. He looked at his dad and laughed. His dad just shrugged and changed the radio station to the rock station. Louis bounced his head to the music while looking out the window. 

    When they got to the school they said their goodbyes. Louis grabbed his bookbag from the back seat. He walked up to the front office. "Hello?" He said grabbing the woman's attention from behind the desk. She turned her head and was shocked to see all the tattoos on the boy. "M-may I hep you?" Louis gave her a look before answering her "I'm new, I need my schedule." He explained. She went through the computer clicking random names before printing out a sheet of paper. "Lewis Tomlinson, right?" Louis glared at her and took the paper. "Yeah." He grumbled and walked out.

    He looked at the paper. Where would he find Ms. Phillips class? He saw students everywhere walking around. One boy caught his eye though. He was tan and wore a black leather jackert. His hair was styled upward, an quiff. Louis could see tattoos from under the lad's V-Neck T-Shirt. He walked towards him, maybe he would make some friends. "Hey, can you help me?" Louis asked. The tan boy turned around and smiled. "Sure, what do you need help with?"

    Louis explained that he was new and didn't know where any of these classes were. The boy looked through it. "Hmm, well you at least have third with me. My name is Zayn, by the way." Zayn took his hand out for Louis to take. Louis shook it "Louis." 

    The bell ringed throughout the school which meant everyone was suppose to start going to homeroom. "Walk with me, I'll show ya." Zayn said. Louis started to follow him. After walking into a building, then down a long hallway, they were finally at Ms. Phillips'. Louis thanked Zayn and walked into the class room. A female teacher looked up from her desk and smiled up at Louis. She stood up and walked towards him. "Students, listen up. This is our new student." 

    Louis heard a few people greeting him with Hey's and Hi's while other stared at him in fear. But one person did catch his eye, Louis was surprised himself about so many people catching his eye today. A small boy sitting in the way back corner. He had a sweater that was a bit too big and a flower crown on his head. But he wasn't looking up at him. "Take a seat anywhere, Louis." Ms. Phillips said. Louis nodded his head and headed to the back where he saw the open seat next to the boy. 

    He was stopped mid way by a girl. She was wearing way too much makeup, her boobs barley fit the shirt she was wearing, her earrings were huge also, and she was wearing a mini skirt. "why don't you sit beside me." She winked and put her hands on his stomach. Louis gave her a disgusted look. "Your face is not a coloring book, your boobs are fake, and frankly I just do not like you." Louis said and continued walking. The class started to laugh.

    Louis sat in the seat and placed his bookbag on his right side, to get a better look of the boy. He was still looking down. Louis noticed he was drawing a flower. It wasn't that bad, he had to admit. He felt people looking at him, but he's use to it. Usually when he would just go outside people would stare at him. He looked up and people looked in the other direction. He chuckled to himself then started to look around.

   The classroom was at least filled with 30 people. The walls were covered with posters that looked like the students had made. He looked to his left and saw a girl with long bouncy brown hair. She had a red long sleeve shirt and jean shorts on. He looked at the paper she was writing on and saw the name Jesy in the far right corner. She slowly turned her head and looked back at him. "Can I help you?" She asked sweetly, even though she wanted to say it harshly but he's new. 

    Louis shook his head no with a small smile. "Just looking around the classroom. What's your name?" "Jesy." She smiled and went back to doing what he thought was math. 

    After a few more minutes the bell rang and he saw people standing up. He stood up and looked to his rght but saw the boy was just sitting there. He tapped his shoulder. The by flinched then looked up. "We're leaving?" Louis said. "Oh thank you.." the boy said quietly with a blush. Louis shrugged and started to walk to his next class, after asking Jesy where to go 


    Harry walked down the hall. He had that tattooed boy stuck in his head. He was talking to him, which is strange. No one talks to him but Niall and Liam. It had to be because he was new, if he knew he was gay he would beat him up like the rest of them did. Harry was a bit scared of him, just because of his face. But his baby blue eyes reminded him of the sky and his face reminded him of an angel's. 

    Harry was walking to his first period, which he hated. Full of poeple he hated and hated him. This was the only class he didn't have Niall or Liam. He walked in and saw people's mouth moving towards at him. He was guessing they were shouting from their necks looking different. They were saying the usually fag, ugly, worthless, etc. 

   At first, the words didn't get to him. But the more they said, the more he realized it was true. The first time he cut was because of them. He didn't want to kill himself, he just wanted to try and feel what it felt like. He cried the first time and swore he would never do it again. A promise he broke two days later. 

    He sat in the way back like always. He kept his head down so he wouldn't have to see the words mouthed at him. Even if he couldn't hear them they still hurt. He felt paper being thrown at him. He looked up and saw one of the bigger guys mouth open it. He took in a breath before he did. It was a drawing, stick figure, of what seemed to be him hanging himself and on top it said A idea 4 u to kill urself ;). Harry simply balled it back up and threw it away.

    Harry sat back down and played with the ends of his sleeve waiting for the class to began. He opened up his notebook he liked to doddle in. He picked up his pencil and started to add more shadow to the pedals of the rose. He leaned his head on his left hand, keeping the sleeve up. While shading a bit dark someone kicked his desk and he accidentally made a huge dark mark down the middle. He felt tears sting his eyes. He was working pretty hard on the rose and with one mark it's ruined. He looked up to see a jock smirking. 

    He closed his notebook and placed it gently in his pack bag, anger obvious to his face. He looked back up and saw the tattooed boy. Dammit, he cursed seeing the only seat next to him was a opened seat since no one like him. Louis looked around and nodded his head at Harry. Harry blushed and looked away. He looked up to see people looking at him with disgust. He looked over at Louis and saw him mouth The hell is wrong with you people, why are you staring back here? 

    Harry sighed. Someone was going to tell him, then he would join in. The bigger guy opened his mouth but looked over as their teacher walked in. Harry really didn't want to have this cute scary person to hate him and beat him up. 

    Harry watched as the teacher's mouth moved. Okay class, we're doing a new project. We were suppose to do this at the beginning of the school year but lost track with everything else. You're going to be partnered up with someone, your choice, and you're going to do a study of them and show it to the class! 

    Harry slummed in his seat as he watched people cheering and looking at each other for a partner. Everyone was sitting beside their partner so that the teacher could write down the partners. He doesn't have a partner, so what is he suppose to do it on.  He watched as the teacher spoke to him Louis, you want to be his partner? He said in disbelief. Even the teacher didn't like him. Harry looked over at Louis Why not

    The teacher just sighed and wrote down the partners. Harry looked at 'Louis', so his teacher called him and didn't say anything. Soooo, Louis mouthed. Louis looked down then back up, You draw, yeah? Harry shook his head and gave him a confused look. Oh well I saw you drawing a flower and I just thought... Harry grabbed his notebook out of his bookbag. "You mean this?" he asked opening to the page of the rose with a big black mark down the middle. Yeah. Louis gave the drawing a confused look.

    My name is Louis Tomlinson, by the way. "Harry Styles." Harry mumbled. Harry opened to a fresh page and began to write Louis Tomlinson. He looked up and saw his mouth moving paper. Is all he saw him say. "I'm sorry, what?" Can I burrow a piece of paper? Harry went to the very back but slammed it closed. He forgot he had written his death note for if he will kill himself. Louis gave him a strange look. He was judging him and he didn't even know him.

    Harry sighed and excused himself to go to the bathroom where instead he stayed for the rest of the period. ((he has a phone, he just looked at the time on the phone for when he had to leave.))


    Louis sat there alone for the rest of the period. He told the teacher that he hasn't returned but the teacher just said he's probably just skipping. But he looked to innocent to skip, Louis thought to himself. 

    Louis walked towards his next class. He saw Harry come out of the bathroom "Hey!" He shouted but Harry didn't turn back "Harry!" He shouted loudly. Even the people near him was looking back. He groaned. He was going to ask if he wanted to work on the project at his house or something but he won't even stop. He started to run towards his direction. He watched as a taller guy, buff, with a kind smile greeted Harry. 

    Louis caught up with them and tapped Harry's shoulder. The buff guys face turned into anger. "Who the hell are you?" He asked crossing his arms blocking him from Harry. "I'm Louis, Harry is my partner for a project but he ran out on me and I was going to ask if he wanted to go to mine and work on it" Louis said honestly, looking up at the guy. The guy smiled again and took his hand out. "I'm Liam!" Louis shook his hand then turned to Harry. "So what da ya say?" Louis asked. Harry have him a confused look. "About coming over to mine to work on the project?" 

    How could Harry not of heard him? He was pretty much shouting over the other students. Louis repeated the question. "Su-sure.." Harry mumbled and went to his next class.


    At the end of the day, Harry had a few new bruises on him. The kids in his last period class are the worst. He has to sit beside someone in that class, as there were too many people in that one. The kid beside liked to punch and kick him. Liam and Niall couldn't see this as they were on the far other side and people blocked the view. He kicked pretty hard, too. It hurt to walk but he tried to look like he was walking regular because he was suppose to meet that tattooed boy.

    Harry thought maybe this was a bad idea, maybe he was just going to mess with him. But Louis doesn't know about him yet, so he won't join in on the beatings hopefully. 

    He saw Louis outside next to Zayn. Zayn didn't mess with him. Zayn didn't talk to him, just give him a nod time-to-time. Zayn was smoking and Louis was talking to him. Harry looked around and saw Jim, the one that punches and kicks him. He started to run towards the road, every now and then and he could tell by the smirk on his face he wanted to fight.

    He ran towards Louis and Zayn instead. Louis waved and Zayn looked behind him. Everyone was scared of Zayn. He gave Jim a look and Jim stopped walking towards Harry and towards the other direction. Sorry, my dad isn't home so we can't go there. I don't have a key. Can we go to yours? Louis mouthed with a smile. Harry simply nodded "It's right down the road." Harry whispered. He didn't want anyone else knowing where he lived. 

    Louis said good-bye to Zayn and started to walk with Harry. Harry wasn't kidding when he said it was down the road. They arrived to a two story house that was white with white fences around the garden. Harry walked ahead and Louis noticed the limp. Harry didn't hear Louis ask him what was wrong, so Louis left it. 

    They walked inside and Harry slammed the door open. Of course, he didn't know he slammed it. A girl walked down the stairs that very much like Harry. The girl smiled and looked at Louis. Who are you? Are you a friend of Harry? Harry watched his sister's mouth. Harry looked over at Louis. Yes, you must be his sister? Harry looked back at Gemma. Yes, I am, I'm Gemma. Nice to meet you. They shook their hands. 

    Harry started to walk upstairs, stomping up the stairs not knowing he was being loud. Louis followed him and they arrived to his bedroom. He watched Louis look around his room. I like your room Louis mouthed with a nod. "Thanks." Harry said throwing his book bag down on the floor. He motioned Louis to take a seat at his desk as he went to the bathroom. 


    Louis sat down in the roll chair and looked around Harry's desk. There was another notebook, thinking it was drawings, he opened it. But instead it was writing. He looked behind him to the closed door then back to the first page. 

    Dear Journal, 

Mummy said I should have something to write my thoughts in. She said it ins't like a diary, but I know it is. Today was okay, I met a new friend. His name is Niall and he's very hyper. He talks really fast so kinda hard to know what he's saying. But he's great. Well that's all I have to say today Journal. Bye. 

   Love, Hazza. January 5th, 2013. 

   Louis looked at the journal. It was a bit tore up, he's had it for while obviously. He looked back at the door. Harry seemed to like to run away when it came to talking about him. He took a chance and stuffed the journal into his book bag. It wasn't the first time he stole, and at least this time it was for school. 

   As he was zipping up his bookbag Harry walked in. Harry sat down on his bed. "Can I do my study on you first?' Harry spoke quietly. Louis noticed that. "Yeah sure." Louis smiled. 

    "Question One: Full name."

    "Louis William Tomlinson."

    "Question Two: birthday."

    "December 24th."

    "Question Three: Have you always lived in Holmes Chapel?" 

    "No, just moved in from Doncaster."

    "Question Four: Do you have any siblings?"


    "Question Five: What are some hobbies?"

    "I like to play football." Louis wasn't going to tell him he liked singing and acting, 

    Harry sighed. "Question Six: Would you rather have an Dog or Cat?"


    Harry look at him in disbelief. "But cats are awesome and cute!" Louis shrugged with a smile. 

    "Question Seven," Harry said annoyed that there were so many questions. "What could you not go a day without?" 

   Louis thought for a second. He doesn't really use his phone since he didn't have anybody to text. He didn't have a car. He didn't care for idiots on television. Louis sighed as he thought. "Not really sure. Do you just want to stop there and I ask you questions or?" Louis asked.

    Harry shrugged, but had a worried face like he didn't want to say yes. Suddenly Louis heard his phone go off. He unzipped the front pocket and pulled out his Samsung. "Hello?" "Hey," It was his dad. His dad was on his way to pick him up, to Harry's luck. "I'll see you later." Louis said and walked down the stairs, saying good-bye to Gemma. 


    "I'll be in my room, Dad!" Louis shouted walking up the stairs to his house. He walked into his room and placed the bookbag on the floor. He got the journal out and fell on his bed opening it to the second page. 

   Dear Journal, 

I think I finally met a guy I like. I like Niall but not that way. His name  is Robin. He's really cute! He has red hair and brown eyes. He has a few freckles too on his nose. I got his number. I'm not sure if he likes guys. There aren't any openly gay guys at my school so it's pretty hard to find someone to date. Oh well, bye Journal. 

    Love, Hazza. January 18th, 2013. 

    Louis was a bit taken back. Harry was gay? Not like he had a problem with gays or anything, being bisexual himself. 

    Dear Journal,

Robin kissed me and asked me out! He really did! I could never be so happy! :) we have to make sure find out though because then people would make fun of us. My school is very homophobic but I don't see how you can be afraid of gays? Anyways, me and Robin were in my room after school and we were studying when he leaned in and kissed me out of nowhere! I was shocked at first, of course. But happy he did it :) Our first date is this Friday too! Wish me luck Journal. 

    Love, Hazza. January 30th, 2013.

    Louis felt jealous and he couldn't find out why. 

   Dear Journal, 

Robin took me out for the date and my birthday. We didn't go nowhere special just down to the pizza palace. After that we went back to my house and my family was there. They asked who Robin was and I explained to them it was just my friend. I grew up in a homophobic family, Mr. Journal. It isn't easy. Well anyways, my mummy got me a new sweater since the one I had holes in it. Daddy got me a new iPod! Gemma didn't know what to get me so she just got me a freaking TV! It's a flat screen and I couldn't thank her more then I did. I got a few more things like clothes, clothes, and oh yeah, clothes. I really wanted a car or something! Like a cat! I have to go Mr. Journal, talk to you soon.

    Love, Hazza. February 1st, 2013. 

   Dear Journal, 

Sorry I haven't wrote in awhile! Just been spending most of my time with Robin. I finally told him I was deaf.

   Louis' eyes went huge. Harry, he was deaf! That couldn't be, he would respond to him when he talked, he was writing down what he said. That's when Louis noticed he was looking at his lips, not his eyes. He could read lips! Of course. 

He was, well, surprised. He asked me how could he know what he was saying I told him it was simple that I could read his lips and he didn't talk to fast. Our one month anniversary is coming up too. I'm really happy I found him. I know it's only been a month Mr. Journal but I think I love him. 

   Love, Hazza. Febuary 28th, 2013. 

   Louis closed the journal. Well, at least he found out his birthday. But now he found out he might be in love with his boyfriend, which he hasn't seen him around at all. Maybe they broke up? Louis felt a bit to happy about that maybe and skipped down the stairs for dinner. 


     Louis woke up randomly. He wasn't sure why he woke up but then he heard thunder. It was so loud , it scared him. He groaned and laid his head back down on the pillow. The lighting and thunfer annoyed him and he couldn't fall asleep. He looked over at the journal. Why not? Louis thought. 

    Dear Journal, 

    Louis noticed Harry's writing was a bit shaky already. 

I feel so so so so so stupid. I can't believe all of it was a joke. A huge fucking joke. I thought I found my love but no. Robin was recording us making out and he sent it to everyone. You can't really see him, just his mouth and nose. I didn't know he was recording! When I got to school everyone was calling me a faggot and a gay bitch. I didn't understand why they were saying until I saw Robin laughing at me and calling me names. It broke my heart, Mr. Journal. Niall did tell everyone it was Robin the next day. He was called faggot and a gay bitch also. He's moving the dick. I hope my parents don't find out, God knows what will happen if they do. Well Mr. Journal, sorry for crying all over you. Bye Mr. Journal. 

    Love, Hazza. March 6th, 2013. 

   Louis felt anger building up in him. Who does that? Just for a prank they make someone fall in love with them then tell everyone he was gay. Louis wants to meet this Niall though. He only knows of Liam. He turned to the next page. 

    Dear Journal, 

    There were already tear drops all over the paper. 

Mummy and Daddy found out. They weren't happy at all. Daddy just shook his head and walked away from me. Mummy was the tough one. She slapped me hard, my cheek still hurts. I'm guessing she was yelling at me because her face was red. She was saying mean things. The words I saw were something like 'You're a disgrace to this family, to the world, I wish the abortion would've worked.' It hurt a lot. It hurt more than my cheek. I tried reasoning with her but she just slapped me again and told me to get out. I couldn't even grab my stuff. Gemma was coming over for dinner too anyways. Her and Mummy got into it. Gemma beat up mummy and Daddy tried to hit Gemma. That's when I stepped in, for once. I grabbed the bat that was beside the door and hit his head with it. I was arrested. Gemma wasn't so she got me out and now I live with her. I guess Mummy and Daddy really aren't my parents if they can't handle having a gay son. Thank you, Mr. Journal for letting me cry on you and spill my guts to you. By the way, when did I start calling you Mr. Journal? 

    Love Always, Hazza. March 8th, 2013. 

    Louis closed the notebook. He couldn't believe all that happen to Harry. Harry just seems so nice and innocent, and kicking him out because he's gay is not a good enough reason. Louis shook his head at the thought. Good thing he has Gemma. 


     Harry woke up to Gemma shaking him. School. Harry groaned and turned on his side, not wanting to go. Gemma grabbed the cover off him. He glared at the back of her head and stood up, walking to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth after he used the bathroom. He walked back in his room to change. He took his shirt off and looked at all the bruises on his chest. He sighed and reached for another shirt. He switched his pajama pants with black sweats. He put on his gray sweater and turned to grab his book-bag. That's when he noticed Mr. Journal was gone. 

    Harry started to panic and went over to the desk. He moved papers around, shoving things onto the floor. He felt someone tap his shoulder. He looked back at Gemma with a worried face, guessing she had taken it and read it. What are you doing? "My Journal- it's gone." He told her. Do you think that boy took it? Harry thought back. Why would he take it? To spread his secrets, he didn't like him, it was just an act. 

     Harry felt tears in his eyes at the thought of anyone finding out about his cutting. "I'm going to school.." Harry said quietly walking past his sister. Gemma simply grabbed his book bag and went down to Harry to give him his book bag. 

      Harry arrived to the school with a sad face, usually it was blank. He walked towards his locker to arrange his book to get ready for class. He felt someone tap his shoulder and he saw Niall and Liam. He smiled at them, a weak one, while he locked his locker. 

      What's wrong, Haz? Niall asked. Harry just shook his head and said he better get to class. 

      He walked into Homeroom and saw Louis sitting where he sat yesterday. Harry looked around the class and saw Jesy, Cotton, and Jimmy. Usually it was just them four, so he was curious on to why Louis was here so early. He took his seat next to him and Louis gave him a smile. Harry gave him a weak smile before looking sad again and grabbing his notebook out. Before he opened it he looked at Louis. 

      "Did you happen to see a journal on my desk yesterday at my house?" Louis hook his head no and Harry sighed deeply. He opened the notebook to a fresh page and started to draw random patterns on the paper. 


       First period, back to asking questions. Harry and Louis walked class together, some people giving Harry glares. But Louis now understood why. Still not a good enough reason to bully someone for liking the same sex as them. What if people were bullied for liking the different sex? Doesn't that sound stupid? Just as stupid as making fun of someone for liking the same sex. 

       The teacher said they were just working on the project so Harry grabbed out the notebook he was writing in yesterday. 

        "We're on question seven, what is one thing you couldn't spend a day without?" 

        Louis groaned and hit his head on the table. He still couldn't come up a answer for that. "Skip it?" Louis asked moving his head up so Harry could read his lips.

        "Question Eight: Where do you see yourself in twenty years?" 

         Louis realized they were going into the deep thoughts questions. "Being thirty-eight, gross." Louis wrinkled his nose and Harry smiled at him, then wrote it down. 

        "Question Nine: If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?"

     Louis' face filled with anger. What kind of question it that? Obviously not growing up with his mum. "Nope." 

      Harry wrote it down and went to the next question. As he was reading the teacher started talking telling everyone to hush but Harry was too busy reading the question. Louis shook his arm to signal him to be quiet. "Okay class we gotta work on History now. We'll work on the projects tomorrow." Harry closed his notebook and stuffed it in his bookbag. 



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