“Why don’t you get it, Justin?”
“Because you’re not making sense! You have your walls up, but so do I. You have a past, and I do too. You know we’re perfect for each other!”
I scoffed. “You’re ridiculous.”
I turned to face him, anger blazing through me. “I’m a suicide mission. My mind is filled with demons and I’ve surrendered to them. I can’t do this anymore; I’m broken, Justin.” My voice began to rise as my anger grew and I met his eyes. “Why can’t you understand that you should stay away from me!”
He ran his hands through his hair, frustrated. “See, that's the problem. I can’t stay away from you. I haven’t been able to since the minute I met you!”
My breathing hitched as he came closer and closer, walking angrily towards me. He let out a frustrated groan as he pushed me against the side of his car. He brought his mouth up to my neck, breathing heavily.
“You have to keep going. You’re broken and I still love you. You’re still perfect. You’re broken, so let me help. Let me fix you."


34. Life Without You

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I asked, pacing back and forth in Abby’s apartment. I chewed my thumbnail in worry, no way could he still be gone.

“I’m sorry, Cassie.” Ashton pouted, wheeling his way around to me. “You know how he gets, he just needs to clear his head.”
“Its been weeks, Ashton! Weeks! No text, no calls nothing! All his stuff is gone from his room and there is nothing to ever suggest he was even here at all! How are you so calm about this Ashton!”

“He’ll be fine! Do you want a pretzel?”

A scream of irritation tore its way painfully from my throat before I stomped into the room Justin should be in slamming the door behind me and falling onto his bed. His desk was empty, not a single thing left on it except for a small “I hate homework” scribble. The wardrobe doors had been left open, something I know Justin couldn’t stand, his draws half open, some closed. His room looked empty, yet trashed and dirty. I miserably pulled the covers all the way to my neck, resenting yet reveling in the smell of Justin that he had left on the sheets. It was fading due to me basically living in his bed. Since he left, I’ve been miserable. Crying at the slightest memory, the slightest mention of his name. I barely ate for 2 weeks, I was too worried about him. He ignored my texts, my calls and not just from me. He ignored when I called on Abby’s phone, Noah’s and Ashton’s, hell, I even called on Aunty Steph’s. I had no clue if he was even alive until Ashton reassured me that Justin had used his credit card to buy himself a hotel in New York, so he was most definitely alive. Nate had been telling the truth, giving us as well as the police incredibly accurate information about everything that had gone on and was so far, believable. He kept his promise of leaving us alone, I hadn’t seen or heard anything linked to Nate since Justin left, the two were eerily just…gone. I guess they knew how to disappear off the map for a while.

I was forced to go to school, it being my senior year and all. So far, the only time I can stop thinking about him is when I’m studying. So I indulged myself in my studies, and its at least paying off. The look of betrayal on his face after finding I had called the police has carved itself into my memory, engraved it into my brain cells and left scars that wouldn't be healed for years. Every time I close my eyes, I am back in that cellar, the disappointment and betrayal clear all over his face, evident in his eyes. The guilt eats away at me each day, each night. If it wasn’t for me he would probably be with me in this bed right now, not in another fucking state. I groaned in irritation with myself. I miss him more than I could ever imagine, and I guess its taken him leaving for me to realize that I do love him. I truly do, and he’s not even here for me to tell.

“Cassidy? Dinner is ready if you want it.” Noah said softly.

“Coming.” I muttered, still pissed off with Ashton and his disregard for Justin. Or maybe I was just annoyed because he wasn’t agreeing with me.

I sat down in my seat as a bowl of pasta was put in front of me. I made no move to eat it, only playing with it and pushing it around my plate, my head in one hand and my fork in the other.

I glared in agitation at Abby and Ashton who sat next to each other, Abby still taking perfect care of Ashton even though he was able to get his cast off next week. They were the perfect couple. So in love, so happy that they barely realized me glaring holes into the sides of their heads in jealousy.

“What is Justin even doing in New York anyway, stupid idiot.” I mumbled to myself, hating that I couldn’t be with him, couldn’t hear his voice or see his beautiful hazel eyes just one more time to tell him I loved him. Or goodbye. Whichever.

“Thanks for dinner.” I muttered to the three others sitting at the table before picking up my untouched bowl and placing it in the sink. I quickly walked into Justin’s room and got back under the covers, hoping and praying that one day I’d see him again. Tears burned my eyes as my throat began to close up and I let out a small sob of heartbreak. What if I never saw him again?

“Cassie, please don’t cry.” Noah shoved open the bedroom door and crouched down in front of me. “He’s not worth your tears. When he comes back I swear he’s going to regret ever leaving.”

I said nothing, my tears coming faster and faster as my breathing became erratic.

“Can you stay?” I mumbled to Noah. He had been the only one who seemed to give a shit about how I was feeling about Justin leaving. He had been the only one to know just how serious I was taking it. We were always close, but Justin leaving had left an empty, hollow space in me and Noah was able to fill a tiny section of that with his friendship.

“Yeah sure, scoot over.”
I moved so my back was against the wall, leaving room for him to get in.

“G’night Noah.” I mumbled, cuddling up to his side as he laid on his back.

“Night Cas. I promise it won’t be all bad for too long. Even if I have to make it better myself.”

I hoped he was right. I hope that I wouldn’t be left by him just like my parents did, just like Justin did, just like everyone had in my life so far.

Justin promised me he would fix me, that we would be okay together.

Instead, I’m lying in his bed full of broken promises. An empty heart within a broken girl, is all he left for me.







I looked around the large office, the pristine walls, the tiles so white and shiny they could star in a toothpaste advertisement. The entire building screamed wealth, but this office really topped it off. Finally, I was here. After weeks of searching I had finally found someone who would help me make it to where I wanted to be in life, regardless of my tattoos, my mistaken past and everything that went with it. This was going to be my new start, alone. A new me.

The whole prison thing really woke me up. It made me realize that none of us are invincible and eventually everything catches up to you. I dropped out of senior year at Cassidy’s school, since I’ve never really been much of an academic student.

“So, Justin. I know a bit about you. A bit about what your like and where your talents lie.” A tall man with a booming voice walked into the office, almost making me want to cower to him. I knew he was the ultimate boss, not just by the obvious recognition, but by his character.

“And I must say, I’m extremely impressed. You made it this far on your own, but now you’re going to need a bit of help. I can get you in touch with the people you need to be in touch with, get you some help here and there. But obviously, its down to you. To your work ethic, your dedication…you get the point. This job is one where you need to work extremely hard, 16 hour days and nights to pull this off in time for the new season. Do you understand?”

“Of course, sir. I’ve wanted to do this for a while, and I can’t think of anything else that I want. My mother always wanted this for me and she’s extremely sick… I want to do this for her. However nobody wanted to pick me up on the job because of my past experiences in life.”
“Ah, yes. About that.”

I felt my stomach slipping slowly, making me feel nauseous. Was he going to get rid of me? Before I could even say a word, he had reached under his desk and pulled out a huge stack of papers.

“This,” he started, “Is a contract. It will help you make it to the top fast in this industry, with my help of course.”

“The terms?” I asked sharply, already pulling my pen out of my newly bought blazer pocket.

“Well, by doing this, you’re leaving your old life behind. Everything. By pursuing this job, you can’t possibly have anyone find out about your old life. We can rid you of the trouble you’ve been in, as long as you sign this contract. It states you won’t speak to anyone from that time period, you won’t speak of the events that occurred and neither will anyone else.”

My heart flipped in my chest. Never speak to Cassidy again? I loved her, could I really leave her behind forever? And my best friends, I had known Abby since diapers, and Ashton and Noah were my ultimate back ups. Could I leave them all behind for one job?

A job you’ve always wanted. Think about it! A few causalities for the greater good never hurt anyone!

I bit down worryingly on my bottom lip. This was something I’ve always wanted to do but never had the opportunities, never had the ability to do it alone.

“Justin, are you absolutely sure this is what you want to do with your life?”

“This is everything and more. I’ve never wanted to do anything so badly in my entire life.”
“Then do you agree with the terms? We’ll give you everything you need, ready and prepared. You can make your own choices, within the limits of course. The contract lasts four years, so by signing this you’re basically agreeing to achieving undeniable success for the next four years. That doesn’t sound too bad to me.” he said, leaning back into his chair and crossing his arms over his incredibly large chest.

I looked around the office carefully. This could be me. I could have this much money, this much success.

But you can never see Cassidy again.

Or your friends.

But this was a once in a lifetime opportunity! I would never be able to say yes to this ever again. It was this or nothing.

After letting out a deep sigh I gave the man in front of me a confident grin and held my pen hand at the ready,

“Where do I sign?”



Okay, so I really need your help here. If you guys WANT a sequal, please leave a comment on either this chapter or the next one which will be uploaded TOMORROW. If i don't get enough people saying they would actually read the sequal then i wont post one so if you want one let me know! love you all ! 

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