Trouble {One Direction}

Sometimes we don’t realize things before they’re too late. Sometimes we realise them just before and sometimes we see them at the very beginning. We start moving into the darkness and move around in seducing ankles. It’s fun in the beginning but sometimes it can all be taken to a point where it’s going way out of line. Why couldn’t we stop this before it was too late? Why did we keep moving to the stars and the sound of our own emptiness? But as it’s been said before… the thing about pain is that it’s demanding to be felt and I so felt it this time. I’m so sorry for what I started between us. We could have made it if it wasn’t for what I kept doing to you.

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17. 17

London was a chaos and I meant really a fucking chaos. It was mental and I had never seen this many people in one place. The city centre was so fucked up and it was amazing.

Liam showed me around and I expected it to be something really really special but truth is it was not that different from my own town, just a lot bigger. London was like everyone said, it was amazing in all way. It was charming and beautiful and everything I ever wanted to see.

“Liam I need to ask you something.”

“Then ask.”

He looked at me, we were sitting covered a little in the corner of a restaurant at Leicester Square. The food was cheap but it was some of the best food I had ever gotten in my life. Better than the food I used to cook for myself back home and better than the food I bought at the pub when I was lucky enough to eat there.

“I don’t understand why I don’t remember anything from last night. Why did I wake up on the sofa? What happened.”

“Honestly Kerry, you must have been sleep walking. You came with me to bed last night and I held my arms around you when you fell asleep that’s all I know.”

“But it doesn’t make sense.”

“Not everything has to make sense.”

He smiled at me before we both dug into our food to finish the rest we had on our plates. I kept thinking it was strange but it was possible that I had been sleepwalking. I had done it before so why not? Last time I did it I had tried stopping my addiction as well and I had ended up at some of the strangest places I’ve ever been.

“So where are you taking me next?”

We had just gotten out of the restaurant and I seemed to be having the best day of my life so far.

“I don’t know. Is there anything you want to see?”

“Actually I’d like to go back to your place and then go to a club tonight. I think I can handle it.”

“Fine but I’ll decide the place we’re going.”

“You’re the one leading this, so of course. What did you have in mind?”

“I’ll show you when we get here.”

He smiled at me before we went to find the car and drove back to the complex. It seemed crowded here and when we went upstairs there was a lot of noise and different people yelling. I didn’t recognise the voices at all, and it all scared me a lot because they were discussing something that sounded very serious. I hid myself behind Liam as he kept walking up the stairs. My grip on his arm was tightened and we stopped when we saw the door to Harry’s old apartment wide open. The noise came from the apartment, and of course Liam had to walk in.

“Nothing was supposed to be taken from here! That’s what we promised his mother, yet you let her take something!”

“Don’t you think I know that?! I just never realised she took something. Liam shouldn’t even have let her in here in the first place.”

“No one should be in here!”

There were three boys discussing in the bedroom and it was easy to tell that they were talking about me and the few things I had removed from the old bedroom. I had taken the shirt I knew and loved, the watch that belonged to Liam but was lastly worn by Harry and a few other things as well just to remind me of him, because I wanted him close to my heart where he still belonged.

“Are we interrupting something?”

Liam spoke to the boys, one of them being Niall who had scared the shit out of me last night, the two others I recognised from the photo.

“They’re your old band mates?”

“Yeah…”

He had looked at me shortly and I had appeared behind them. They all looked angry with me and I was scared of what was going on right now.

“What’s going on?”

I looked at them as they kept staring at me. They seemed so out of control, wild and seemed to be the kids who would always bring trouble.

“What did you take from here?”

“The things that belonged with me.”

“None of his stuff belongs with you. They’re supposed to be here.”

“The jumper missing, is that the one you want so bad? Because I’ve been wearing it more than he has ever since he moved away from all of this.”

I don’t know why I felt brave enough to talk, but it didn’t stop me from doing it. Yet I had still never felt more scared in my life.

“Don’t act like you knew him. You knew nothing about who he was. We’ve been told everything that has been going on between you and him and how you forced him into the drugs.”

“He was an addict before I even got to know him. It’s not my fault that we brought the worst out in each other. I tried to save him when he died. I was there by his side when he died. Where were you? You didn’t even have the balls to show up to the funeral that was arranged by me. So don’t come here and teach me about Harry because I knew the Harry I loved. I knew the guy I fell in love with and wanted to live the rest of my life with not to mention wanted to be sober with.”

That’s when everything stopped for me and started shaking all over. It was like the room started to move around and I couldn’t help but feel a little shaken when the next thing I saw was Liam’s face really close to mine. 

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