To be forgotten

You can take away my family, you can take away all my stuff and you can take away my hope. I've still given up and I want to just fall away in oblivion.


12. Go on...

Niall came out of breath into the room. He shone with his hole face and he threw himself almost over me. 
"It will be a lawsuit against them." 
I didn't know if I should smile and be happy or not. I hugged him and then I saw that he was really happy. 
"Is that good?" 
He nodded and released me. He sat down on the edge of the bed and he smiled at me. 
"Yes, it's good!" he then looked closely at me. "I'm sorry I didn't come last night, but I happened to fall asleep on the couch at home, with all the papers over me." 
I understood that he certainly had an explanation. I knew also that he couldn't sit by my side the whole time. 
"It's okay, Niall. They lulled me down."
He nodded. 
"And have you dreamed?" 
I shook my head. 
"I slept pretty well last night and I didn't wake up with panic." 
He laughed lightly and took my hands in his. 
"This weekend you with me. I talked to Matt about to let you get out from here." 
I was surprised. 
"Are you serious?" 
Niall nodded. 
"I've talked to your aunt. You'll spend the night with me, but we are going to visit her." 
I blushed. 
"I'll sleep in your home?" 
Niall laughed and kissed me lightly. 
"You're my girlfriend and I have already seen you naked." 
I blushed.
"Well you might accidentally seen me naked?" 
He kissed me again and then stood up. 
"So you can't leave the bed?" 
I shook my head. 
"No, I must rest, said Matt." 
Niall giggled and he disappeared off to the door. He opened it and took in a bag. I watched as he picked up a play station with two controllers. I was surprised. 
"Shall we play?" 
He nodded and smiled with his whole face. 
"I bought it for you and I thought that it's a bit more fun than just staring at the movies."


Niall learned me to play football, drive a car and fight. He had a variety of games and I have to admit that the child in me came to life. Niall was a good loser, but he was an even better winner. I just laughed at him and I couldn't stop smiling. It felt as if we hadn't done anything else and finally I was tired of the whole body.


Niall was still playing, but I lay down next to him and just rested. I looked at him and I loved to see his profile. I couldn't help but smile, and my whole body tingled by his presence. He wasn't aware that I looked at him. Instead, he was completely in the game. I don't know when I fell asleep. I just remembered that I looked at him and slowly I disappeared away.


I saw how the whole land burned. There were aircraft parts everywhere and I had to go over the different parts of its body. 
"Mom? Dad?" 
I saw dead bodies everywhere and there was blood everywhere. I panicked. Where were they? I wanted to find them. I was desperate, but the more I searched among the bodies, the larger the area was. In the end, I saw more bodies all over the place and I saw a lot of parts from the aircraft. There was no chance of finding them. I realized I couldn't do anything and all were dead.


"Honey, it's okay!" 
I cried, but I didn't feel the same deep panic as before. I was just sad and I felt emptiness in the whole body. I held on Nialls body and I pressed myself against him. He held me and I felt his body heat against me. 
"It's going to be okay." he whispered. I nodded and I knew he was telling the truth. I swallowed and I tried to be calm again. 
"They're dead?" 
"I know!" he whispered quickly in response. He held me so soft and he showed with the whole body that he cared.
"It was just a dream." 
I nodded and looked up at him. Niall smiled at me and he looked straight into my eyes. 
"You didn't scream this time." 
I smiled weakly. 
"A progress?" 
He nodded with satisfaction and ran his hand through my hair. 
"Try to go back to sleep again. I will stay up until you fall asleep." 
I put my head against his chest and I felt safe. Slowly vanished the dream away and I almost forgot what I had dreamed. I was only aware that Niall was there. I heard his heart and it made ​​me feel normal again.


I don't know if I was happy with my life. Matt wanted me to be still, but I felt restless. I didn't just want to sit in bed and stare. 
"But you can't work out yet." he mumbled and sighed. "You think you feel better than you do." 
I sighed and I almost got mad at him. I leaned back in the bed and changed the channel on the television. 
"I'm an adult." I mumbled cold and gave him a quick glance. "I'm not a kid anymore and I should know what I want to do." 
Matt laughed and he agreed. 
"There's nothing wrong with your mind?"
It didn't help. He came up to me and he sat down at the bedside. 
"This weekend, are you going with Niall and you will meet your family." he said. "On Monday, if all is well, we start over with the training. Liam has promised to take it easier with you." 
I nodded. 
"What day is it today?" 
He laughed again. 
"Thursday, so you only have one night left here. Then are you going with Niall, home to him."
I longed indeed. I wanted to see something else and I was ready to see the world. It was a new feeling and I realized I really wanted to live. Okay that not everything was as I wanted, but I didn't want to go back to my old self.

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