Innately, there are qualities in human beings that are always repetitive. There are things like love and hate and jealousy that are just going to be there forever.


4. Chapter 4

-Britney's POV- 

I walk into my first period class and take a seat next to Rebecca. 

"Hey." I approach and she responds with the same greeting. It's only the second day that I have known Rebecca, but she's so bubbly and open I feel like we've been friends for longer. The only time that has ever happened is with Jordyn and my old friends. When Jordyn left us, I shut down, and I haven't even tried making friends since.

"Paige and I are hanging out tonight since it's a Friday. You should come." She offers and I shrug. I guess she feels like we're closer too.

I don't know if I'm up for hanging out though. I haven't hung out with anyone for a long time and I don't really want to. Well, that's what I would normally think. Normally, I would just straight up decline the offer. No thinking about it first. But with Rebecca, Paige, and their boyfriends, I can't help but want to. Well, a little anyways. Maybe starting school again was a good idea. Maybe I'm finally ready to make friends. 


The word bring back my curiosity about Zayn. What did he mean?

"I'll think about it." I answer as Zayn enters the room. Instead of sitting in front of Rebecca and I like he did yesterday, he sits next to me on my left. I don't understand him one bit so far. And I still am not fond of him at all. I scoot a far right as I can in my seat like it will put a force field between us. 

"Hey Brit."

My force field obviously isn't strong enough.

I don't answer him. I just pick up my pencil and begin doodling random stuff in my notebook while I wait for class to start. 

"Alright then." He says and crosses his arms.

I don't want to be around him. He's a jerk and he's nothing but trouble. 

The teacher walks in at 8:00 and I'm thankful. The entire class Zayn just leans back in his chair and stares at the ceiling uninterested.

About halfway through the lesson, a man walks into the classroom. He's in a suit and his hair is black with grey showing through. His eyes are blue with glasses over them. 

"Hello Mr. Richards. Can I help you with anything?" Mr. Elletson asks the man.

"I just would like to speak to Britney Young. Is she in here?" He asks and I am immediately devoured in confusion. Zayns head snaps up and his eyebrows scrunch in curiosity. Rebecca looks at me curiously and I just shrug my shoulders as I stand from my seat. I gather my notebook and pencil and leave the classroom with the man, who I assume is another teacher here. Once we exit the classroom he turns around and introduces himself.

"Hello, Miss Young. I'm Mr. Richards. The schools principal." He tells me and shakes my hand without me offering it.

"Hi?" I greet back and he stifles a laugh and takes me to his office. When we arrive in the small room, he shuts the door and gestures for me to take a seat. I sit down uncomfortably and fake a smile.

"So, I need to talk to you about a few things." He says to me with a serious look on his face. I am filled with anxiety immediately by the look in his eyes.

"Okay..." I say cautiously.

"As a public school, we are obligated to see every students files." He starts and I feel all color in my face vanish. "Thus, I saw your file on what happened two years ago. Miss Young, you must understand that in this school, we do not allow-" I cut him off from what he was about to say.

"Do you think I'm stupid? It was an accident. I'm not going to go around hurting people on purpose! You think I want my best friend dead because of me? You think I want to be scarred for life? You think I want to hate myself? No! So don't you dare finish that damn sentence!" I raise my voice. I am filled with anger, and I am surprised by how I just spoke to our schools top authority, but I don't regret it.

Did he really just try and tell me not to go around doing what I did? It was an accident. And he's a prick. And I've obviously just let my mouth get me in trouble as usual. Jordyn used to say that my mouth is the #1 thing that gets me in trouble all the time.

He looks very taken back by how I just spoke to him and he also looks embarrassed.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I did not mean for it to sound that way. But as I was saying, It's in our schools rule book that we're going to have to ban you from your car for a few months until my own boss makes a decision on if it's safe for you to be driving around. We've already called who we need in order to do this and we've contacted your mother and she completely understands." He tells me sternly and I feel tears forming in my eyes. I knew this would follow me for the rest of my life and I hate it.

I stand from my seat and he does also.

"I'm sorry but that's life sweet heart. Mistakes are made and they haunt you for a very long time." He states like it's no biggie and I cross my arms.

"What is wrong with you?" I ask and storm out of his office as hot, wet tears fall down my cheeks. I wipe them up viciously with the back of my hand and speed walk through the empty halls. I hurry back to my locker and grab my keys. I don't care how much trouble I'll be in for leaving school early. I could just tell my mother I was feeling ill.

The tears are still rolling down as I slam my locker door shut.

I turn around to walk towards the exit but I bump into someone instead. I look up and I'm not surprised to see a concerned looking Zayn. He's concerned, but I can tell he's trying not to show it.


"What's wrong?" He asks me stepping back a little. I look down embarrassed and wipe my tears.

"Why do you care? You hate me remember?" I ask him and try to walk around him. Of coarse though, he steps in front of me so I can't.

"I never said I hate you." He corrects in a deep voice.

"Yeah, well I've known you for a day and it sure seems like it." I confess looking down. I don't want him to see me cry. It'll just give him the satisfaction of making fun of me for being a baby. "Move. I'm not in the mood for a fight." I tell him and shove him out of my way. 

I really am in the mood for a fight, just not with him. He just makes me even more angry just by the tone of his voice. 

I get past him, but as I go to pass the office, Mr. Richards is standing there.

"Ah, Miss Young. I hope you weren't intending on ditching." He says raising his bushy eyebrows, and crossing his arms. He knows I was going to. 

"I see you have your car keys. Mind handing them over now? I spoke to my boss and he agrees it is not safe for you to be driving around here." He tells me and I can hear my pulse pounding in my ears. 

I feel as though I could literally just make a run for it, but that would only get me in even bigger trouble with the school. My mother would definitely not be pleased with that. 

I toss him my car keys and turn away, wiping fresh tears from my cheeks. When I get to where my locker is, I slump my back against it and slide down so I'm on the floor.

Passing time from first to second period happened while I was in the principals office, so I don't have to worry about anybody seeing me, or bothering me for that matter. I buried my face into my knees with my arms crossed over my head.

I sit there like that for about a minute or so, just silently crying with images of the accident, and Jordyn/s last breaths in my mind. The memories of myself barely keeping alive, while waiting for someone to find us and call help.

When my mind is tortured enough by the memories to the point where I feel nothing, I standing up and wander the halls looking for a bathroom. I clean myself up and head to class. I had to wait a few minutes for my face to go from tomato back to its original color, but it finally does and I go through two more periods before lunch begins.

I don't remember anything we were taught in 3rd and 4th period. I couldn't focus.

This is what I would do to make the pain go away after the accident. I would just force myself to relive it, until my mind and my heart went numb. Maybe I should start doing it again. It really did help.  And obviously, it still does.

I was feeling pain in the hallway. Mr. Richards words wouldn't quit running through my mind so I had to put a stop to the pulling of my heart strings somehow. 

'I'm sorry but that's life sweet heart.'

'Mistakes are made and they haunt you for a very long time.'

Yes, Yes they do.

I enter the lunch room, still feeling nothing. I slump over to the table that Rebecca, Paige, Niall, and Louis are at and take a seat next to Paige this time. I just rest my head on my fist with my elbow supporting my weight and stare at the grey speckled table.

"Hey Britney. Why did you have to go to the principals this morning?" She asks me with curiosity laced in her words.

"Nothing important. Just had to discuss some stuff about why I missed school for two years." I retort not lifting my vision upward so I can see them. My eyes stay where they are. On the table.

I don't want to tell them the truth. I don't want them knowing what I did and the consequences that have followed. There is no doubt in my mind that if I told anyone, word would spread and everyone would hate me. I'd have no friends, not even teachers that would treat me equally, and I would not be able to handle that.

"Oh. Well, why did you miss two years? How old are you?" Rebecca asks me waving a hand up dramatically. I sigh without meaning to and cover it with a cough.

"I dropped out because I really don't like school, and I was going to come back last year but then we moved and had to get settled in. I'm nineteen." I look up to meet their eyes to make my story more convincing. 

"How are you only nineteen if you skipped two years?" Paige questions me.

"When I dropped out I was it was the beginning of senior year. I was only 17 at the time." I answer and lift my head up when the curly haired boy that stuck up for me yesterday sits next to Rebecca, so she's between Niall and him. Paige is between Louis and I. 

"We're still hanging out tonight right?" Paige asks Rebecca.

"Yes. Britney you're coming too, yeah?" Rebecca asks me looking hopeful in her bright blue eyes. I think. I think about the horrible day I've had and how I've almost forgotten about it whilst talking to my new friends. 

"Yeah, sure. But my mom took my car away, so I'll need a ride." I inform the two of them with a small smile and a blush following. I hope they don't ask me why i got it 'taken away' by my 'mom'.

"Alright. You can catch a ride with me." Rebecca answers sending me a look of trust and reassurance. 

Zayn comes out of nowhere and takes a seat next to... Harry? yeah that's his name. I remember Zayn saying it yesterday when he had his little tantrum.

"Heyy! I thought we were hanging out after school!" Niall whines to Rebecca.

"Oh yeah.." Rebecca looks up and thinks.

"You and Niall could hang out 'til like 4:30 and then we could meet up around 5:00. Sound good?" Paige reassures the two love birds and we all nod. 

"I'll just have to walk home." I conclude with a slump of my shoulders and a roll of my eyes.

"Oh, crap! I forgot. I'm sorry Britney. Can't your mom or dad pick you up?" Rebecca asks me. I can tell she feels bad about pretty much dropping the whole 'giving me a ride' thing. 

"My mom works from like, 5:00 in the afternoon to about 6:00 in the morning so in between, she sleeps. Her work schedule's crazy." I tell them. I leave out the question about my father... he's a whole other story... The seem to notice how I avoided the part about my dad so they move on.

"Why don't you drive?" Asks Zayn. He missed the conversation about my car.

"I got my keys taken by my mom." I tell him. Hopefully he doesn't remember when we had our run in in the hallway that I was holding them in my hand. By the look in his eyes, he does, but I don't think he's going to bring it up. He probably understands that I don't want to tell them the real reason. He just nods. 

"It's alright. I don't live that far away." I lie. I only live like 3 miles away.. It would only take like a half an hour to walk..

For about 10 minutes, I listen to them argue. Rebecca and Louis argue that the sentence 'The only ever time' makes sense and Paige, Niall, and Harry argue that it doesn't. I just listen in and laugh at the way Louis and Rebecca finally give up and gasp at the words that leave Louis' lips. 

My attention is torn away from them when I feel a hand touch mine. When I look over, Zayns hand is on mine. I look up shocked. 

"Are you okay?" He asks me looking concerned, once again, about me.

What is up with him? Just yesterday morning, he was pushing me around, being a complete jerk, and now he's following me home, just so he can give me something I dropped, and is concerned about my feelings. 

I furrow my eyebrows and shrug. Before he can question it even more, I pull my hand away and the bell rings indicating lunch is over. Now, I just have to make it through the rest of the day. Then I have the freedom of hanging out with my new friends.

A/N- Hey! Sorry it took so long to update man. I've just not been in the mood. Don't forget to like, comment, and add to your favorites! Thank you, and thank you for reading! ily alllll!!

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