Jade left as it was starting to get dark out. She'd been talking to Fef all day and blushing brightly, laughing while John simply rolled his eyes with a smile and continued to organize his papers. She followed him as he began dropping them all off at his professors rooms, and as he dropped the last one off he let out a small sigh of relief. A week of doing nothing. A week of no classes, no worries, and no responsibilities until next semester. Sleep was calling out to him, so, in lieu of that, John sent her back home, telling her to give Fef his best.
But now, stepping into his apartment alone while he listened to her footsteps recede down the hall, John closed the door behind him and sank to the floor, his forehead meeting the carpet as he let out a low groan.
He was so happy for his cousin, he really was. But this entire situation once again brought up the situation of the ever impending Dave.
Yet now it was worse.
Because on one hand, there was Dave.
On the other, there was Turntech.
Even after the five days of avoidance, they'd managed to patch up the hole that it caused and skip over it without missing a beat. Still making stupid jokes, still talking about good movies (Turntech bashed Nick Cage, so John bashed Boondock Saints and got several insults in return while he just laughed) still doing everything the same. Just with a little bit of flirting.
Okay a lot of flirting.
Like a worryingly large amount of it?
It had gotten to the point that every time he logged on he had butterflies in his stomach, or that he blushed at the dumbest of things. This crush was beginning to get out of hand, and every time he logged off he was just reminded that, well, Dave existed.
Letting out another long groan, John looked at the time, realizing that it was nearly nine at night and he hadn't even messaged Turntech. Dragging himself to stand and turning off the lights in his apartment as he went, John went to his bedroom, flopping down lazily at his computer while waiting for Pesterchum to load. He'd talked to him for a few minutes earlier that day, and he was pretty sure that Turntech would excuse his absence, considering the circumstances.
John let out another ridiculously stretched out groan. Stupid emotions. Stupid stupid emotions making this all complicated. Why did he even like Turntech? It shouldn't even be a thing. Noticing that he was online, John opened up a chat window.
-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:52 --
TG: well thats a hell of a conversation starter
EB: everything is dumb, and stupid, and i quit.
TG: woah hold up there
TG: whats going on
TG: is this about jade?
EB: i'm happy for her, don't get me wrong!
TG: but you havent found your own mate yet
TG: and she has hers and it sucks
TG: i get it
EB: 4 months, and nothing.
Dave was beginning to wake up as he spoke to his friend, spread eagle across his futon as he tapped away on his phone. He'd fallen asleep after everyone had ditched the cafe, Fef heading off to continue talking to Jade and Karkat and Sollux still complaining to each other about their own penpals.
In a weird way, he felt guilty talking about this with Ecto. They'd kind of been flirting like total assholes, regardless of both of their own mates, so this was a weird kind of insulting. And yet he was doing it anyways.
He'd ended up talking to Bro about the fact that his relationship with Ecto probably could be a lot less platonic than it was and he'd still totally be chill with it. And his Bro couldn't even comment besides, "What about John?"
That. . . . was a really good question.
What about John? What about the stranger that he was 'destined' to be with? What about the fact that he'd been looking for 8 months and still found absolutely nothing on him? Sure, he felt bad that he was all up on Ecto, but on the other hand. . .
Ecto was there.
TG: well hey
TG: if it makes you feel any better
TG: i havent found mine either
EB: . . . really?
TG: still frustratingly oblivious as to how the hell ill find them
EB: i wish it helped, but now i just feel bad for you too because this feeling sucks.
EB: what if they're not even looking?
TG: then you live life i guess
TG: i will admit when i first got it i was pretty pissed
EB: you were?
TG: i mean what is this supernatural shit to tell me who to fall in love with
TG: but now
TG: i kinda just feel unloved
TG: and if theyre not looking for me who cares
TG: ill get by somehow
TG: but if they do
TG: then great
EB: but you don't understand, turntech. i literally grew up thinking i was never going to even have a name to go off of. so when it happened, i was ecstatic. sure, i was dumb about it for a few days, but after that i've been looking, and they're just. not there.
TG: did you ever think that theyre far away
TG: maybe they dont live in whereverthefuck washington
EB: of course i have. but with my luck they probably live in a different country, and not even canada!
TG: well then the same is probably my case
TG: i think the best thing to do is just live life as usual
EB: i sucked at doing that from the point i was born. seriously.
TG: i highly doubt that
EB: i'm not kidding.
TG: you are probably the lamest kid ive met
TG: with your nic cage and unironic love for shitty movies
TG: but you are one of the coolest dorks ive ever talked to
TG: and i think its safe to say i am glad to be your friend
EB: well yeah, but that's all connected to the me that my dad helped me find.
EB: the me before that, he wasn't really even a person.
TG: i disagree with that one too
TG: theres plenty of you there behind your dorky tendencies
TG: ive seen them
TG: typed out on this very screen
EB: turnech. i was born blank.
EB: i didn't get a name until i was adopted.
EB: and when i was adopted, i acted like an actual person. therefore, the name is connected to me as a person.
TG: who even fucking cares when you got your name
EB: i do!
TG: youre practically nameless to me
TG: and i still love you
John paused, his heart going cold and swelling at the same time.
EB: you what?
TG: wait what
TG: i mean
"What do you mean?" Dave asked quietly, staring at the screen. He didn't mean to say that, did he? Fuck. Fuck this was bad. Love? Really? You don't feel that for anyone but your mate, period, no exceptions, he should be hung at the fucking gallows just for saying that. God what was wrong with him? Love? Did he really love Ecto? He didn't even know what his real name was. He didn't know what he looked like. The only interaction he'd had with this kid was through messaging him for a few months. They weren't even dating, and they sure as hell weren't mates. He didn't even know him.
But he did.
He knew that he made lame puns. He knew that he was there for him whenever he needed to vent about life. he knew that he could talk to him, he knew that he was adopted, he knew that he wanted to meet Bill Murray someday, he knew a bunch of stupid little facts and hew knew all the most important ones. He knew that he was adopted when he was a little kid, and that his Dad was one of his best friends. He knew more than he was supposed to, because lets face it neither of them really cared about the rules at this point. The only ones they followed were that there were no physical descriptions, no names, and no locations. So far, visually, Ecto was just a big question mark.
But did he love him? Really?
TG: you know what
TG: to hell with that
TG: i do love you
EB: you do?
TG: youre the only person besides my own two brothers that i can talk to
TG: i dont even fucking know what you look like
TG: but your personality is a motherfucking ray of sunshine
TG: i cant believe im even saying that oh my god
John was full out panicking.
The stupidest smile in history had breached his face, but he was also having a hard time even breathing. How was he was supposed to react to this? Love? That was. . . . Big. Hella big, so big, in fact, that John's sluggish mind was having a hard time wrapping around it. Crush? Yes, alright, he'd admit but. . .
"Oh my god!" John chirped out, covering his face as he laughed and cried internally at the same time.
For some reason, the name on his wrist almost burned as he looked at it, but looking back at the screen, he swallowed.
TG: its okay if you dont like me back
EB: i love you too
TG: ill just stop talking forever
TG: wait what
TG: you do
EB: yeah. yeah i do.
EB: everything you say makes me smile, and i can be myself around you.
EB: you are pretty much my favorite person, and i don't even know what you look like.
EB: every time i get to talk to you, i smile like an idiot.
EB: i actually laugh, out loud, a lot because of the things you say.
EB: i value your opinion.
EB: i take your advice.
EB: i love you.
He loved him.
He loved him.
TG: well then
TG: i guess we have come to an agreement
TG: to hell with soulmates and shit
TG: my heart has been taken by a dork
EB: and mine by the nerdiest cool kid in existence.