The Struggle to Rise


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1. Anchors that were sinking my feelings

Everybody's life has stories to tell. Whether it's struggle. Or stress. There will always be those memories we think about at night and we think, "why did that happen to me?" Sometimes they may haunt us. They quickly haunt you as fast as the speed of pain.

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My life was grey. I was confused. Lonely. Depressed. Angry. I didn't know what to do. I was quickly sinking into a sea of despair and several anchors were pulling me down. Nothing and nobody was there to help me rise. My heart was made of glass and it was shattered a million times. Glass never heals. Neither will my heart.

Depression was one of those anchors. Pulling me down faster than any of them. The heaviest anchor on me. It was impossible to rise with it on me. It continues to drown me.

Anger is also a heavy anchor. Anger will get heavy at certain points and it will also be light sometimes. Once it's heavy, it's nearly impossible to control and tame. It would be heavy for me all the time. I never got to feel how light it would be and I never will.

Sadness won't stop sinking. But when sadness occurs, it sinks faster than anything except the anchor of depression. I can't do anything to stop it. It became a part of me forever.

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