I turn the doorknob and walk in Holly's room, when I do I'm almost blinded by the darkness, when I switch on the light my eyes begin to adjust.
I see the shape of her body under the blankets on her bed. I slowly walk over to her, thinking that she's just asleep, but it's far worse. When I pull the covers back I see the most horrific sight you can imagine.
Holly's lying there limp, barely conscious. Her eyes have turned from a chocolate brown, to a light almost white color. She's staring at the corner of the bed, with the sheets soaked in a wet, red liquid. Her arms are cut up to pieces and blood soaks her skin and clothes. The knife lies on the floor, tainted red.
"Holly!" I cry.
No answer. Just a cold dead stare, not even a twitch of an eyebrow. I start to panic, and yank my phone out of my back pocket so fast it almost flies out of my hand. Those three numbers I dial are answered instantly.
"I am so sorry Mr. Quinn, but she didn't make it," Nurse Hudson sighs.
The wind is knocked out of me, she's gone. Never to return. She's died a young, tragic death just like my Cope. It's all my fault. I was the one to push her to that point, all because I wanted to be with her.
"We need you to fill out these forms," she says while thrusting out a clipboard with papers and a pen.
I snatch them out of her hand with tears blinding my sight and stick the board right in front of me. Papers about where she's to be buried if buried and not cremated, and just a bunch of stupid death shit like I had to painfully fill out for Copeland. I never thought I'd ever have to do this again, I was wrong.
"She died only minutes after you brought her in, too much blood loss," the nurse informs me.
Pain is all I feel, and probably all I'll ever feel. I lost one important thing in my life and barely kept myself breathing, but now the score is up to two. Copeland's been dead for a year and a half, and Holly's been gone for half an hour. I have absolutely nothing left, nothing else to live for.
Once I fill out the papers the nurse looks at me as if she needs to ask me something she really doesn't want to, she gets her courage up and gestures towards an open hospital door.
"Would you like to see her?" she sighs.
"No, it would just break me. I don't even want an open casket for the funeral, I've been there and don't wanna go back," I sob into my hands.
The nurse sighs and grabs the clipboard out of my hand. She walks back into that awful room with Holly's deceased body.
One Month Later...
Holly Isabelle Quinn
May 17th 2000-August 11th 2014
Yup, this is the one. I went to the funeral three weeks ago, but couldn't stand looking at that black box they put my baby in. I'd avoided this place for weeks, but just knew I couldn't go any longer without saying my farewells. I'm leaving this town, everywhere I turn I see something that reminds me of Cope or Holly. If I don't get out now I'll lose my mind, more than I already have.
I sink to my knees in the pouring rain, the mud covers my knees, and I grab my hair with both of my fists. I scream out into this world of nothingness.
"Why did you take her from me?! What did I do to deserve all of this pain?!" I shriek.
This stone slab of words is just a way to bring me more torture. I stare at the words with deep agony, trying to get this over with. I only have minutes before the movers have everything packed in the truck back at home.
"I love you okay?! I fucking love you so much! Why did you leave me, I'm sorry baby I really am! Just come back so we can keep each other at bay!"I cry in desperation.
It's what I expected, nobody answers. I will never hear Holly's sweet, innocent fourteen year old voice ever again, it's been lost is a world of missing souls.
"You meant the world to me, and still do. I love you and I guess...this is goodbye my love," I sob.
I press my fingers to my lips and place them on the tombstone, not able to tell which drops on my face are my tears or raindrops. I raise up from the ground, and drive away from this horrid place of pain, suffering, and misery.