Remember me when I'm gone

All Grace wants is for everyone to be happy


7. Sixth month in, the final month

Dear Diary

Number nine on my list was so much fun and I even got to be on TV. It was to be on a Quiz show. Iwrin found that a bit tricky at first but then he said I'll do anything to make you happy because you have a nice smile. Which then made me made happy to hear him say it. Though I did snap at Iwrin again. He came over to my house, and mum said "she's in her room" and sent him upstairs to me. I had my window open and was leaning out of it, when Iwrin walked in "Grace" he gasped "what are you doing?" "anything must be better then this" I said "better then what?" he asked "better then waiting" I said "to die" "and jumping out of the window is going to help-is it?" he asked so, then I finally snapped "how would you know about anything?" I said "you have no idea what I'm going through" "I do know how you feel, Grace" he said "NO, YOU DON'T" I shouted, making him jump "you have no idea and you never will-there's nothing wrong with your heart you're not dying-I am" he didn't say anything-he just turned to walk away then he stopped and looked back at me "and where would you be-Grace if I didn't help you with your-stupid little list" he said so, then I really started to see red"IT'S NOT STUPID!" I screamed the loudest scream ever "BUT WHERE WOULD YOU BE-GRACE?" he screamed back at me "IF I DIDN'T HELP YOU!" then he walked away. I thought jumping out of the window would save me the wait, but Iwrin was right where would I be if he didn't help me? I said sorry sorry to Iwrin, I even begged him to forgive me and when he did I hugged him so hard I thought I would never let go. He asked what number nine was on my line and when I told him, he said he would do anything to make that happen. 

I was outside in the garden when suddenly Iwrin came running towards me "I've got great news" he panted getting his breath back "what?" I asked "I've be talking to some people and they know people on TV who host Quiz shows, all we have to do now is fill out this form" he showed me this white, question form and helped me fill it out. Then we told mum, she was pleased for us and agreed to go with us.

It was amazing being live on air answering all the Quiz questions and it was a even bigger buzz when I won. It was me, Grace Howell against Iwrin Pickles I got 10/10 for each set of questions. Iwrin even threw a bit of wobbly backstage afterwards saying it was not fair and I had all the easy questions but I just told him to stop being a sore loser and I won fair and square. Mum cheered so hard when I'd won, I thought she'd fall of her chair. Then when I was backstage I suddenly started wheezing really badly and struggling to breathe so much, I had to hold onto the wall for support. Iwrin saw me and came rushing over "are you ok?" he asked "I...I can't breathe" I gasped then I fell onto the ground and everything went blank.

I woke up, in the place I didn't want to go back to again in a hurry-the Hospital. "NO!" I screamed as nurses tried to take my blood samples "NOT YET, I'M NOT READY" "Grace, please calm down" said the strugging nurses but I wouldn't calm down even when the doctors held me down-I screamed, cried and struggled. "I've never seen her like this before" said Iwrin-mum just stood there and cried. Afterwards when I did calm down-Iwrin and mum sat beside my bed-I was in the same bed and ward as I was before. Iwrin asked if we wanted drinks and when we said yes he went off to get them. So, it was just mum and me "what did you mean?" asked mum "that you wasn't ready to yet?" "I meant I wasn't ready to die just yet" I said. "Mum, will you promise me something?" I asked, reaching out my hand to her "anything" she said "promise me I'll die at home" "I promise" she said "and please promise me you'll remember me when I'm gone" "Oh, sweetie" she cried "I'll never forget my only daughter, you'll be in my heart foever" then Iwrin came back with our drinks and a ice lolly for himself.

Dear Diary...

There was no need for me to worry so much because I was let out after two days.But not before I had a visit from the trolly man, he was strolling pass me ward room when he looked in and saw me. "GRACE?" he shouted rushing in as two male nurses tried to stop him-but he pushed pass them and ran up to my bed. He looked down at me as I looked up at him "I forgive you!" he said and leaned down and hugged me. The male nurses then marched up and managed to lead him back to his own ward room. I did tell mum about my list and the nine things I already done on it, she did go a bit ape when I told her about the sking saying it wasn't safe and I could have drown and what was I thinking? So, I told her straight I had to learn these things before I died-it took me and Iwrin one whole month to do all nine. "So, what's number ten on that list of yours?" she asked "are you sure you want to know?" I said "as long as it isn't crazy or stupid" she said "then yes" "it's to say Goodbye" I said...

Back at home-me and Iwrin were sat on the sofa watching telly when Iwrin asked me if I wanted a drink and when I said yes he went off to the kitchen to get me and himself a drink. I suddenly started wheezing again, just like that and struggling to breathe so, I laid down on the sofa. Iwrin and mum came into the livingroom-saw me and rushed to my side "it's time" I wheezed "it's time for me to go-Goodbye, I love you" I closed my eyes and listened as my heart stopped beating. I floated out of my body and looked down as mum was crying and shouted and Iwrin tried to push my chest to try and wake me "WAKE UP-GRACE" they were both screaming "PLEASE WAKE UP"

I went to the place, I always wondred about-Heaven. A couple of days later as I was watching mum and Iwrin adjust to life as best as they could without me. I blow a feather down from the sky and it landed right on Iwrin's lap as he sat on his doorstep and he knew straightaway it was from me because he looked up at the sky and smiled "thank you-Grace" he said "I miss you so much, everyday!" Mum found my diary and read it but that's ok because I wanted her to read it. I dropped her down a white feather too and it landed right on her lap too. She knew it was from me because I always loved white feathers. She looked up and smiled "I love you too-Grace" she said "stay safe-I'll see you one day" 


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