Alone in decision. Too afraid to ask anyone on opinion, a seventeen year old girl lies to her mother to go to a twelve step program in hope of cleaning herself up. But will it all go as planned? Or just make situations worse? No matter what happens, her life will be changed and she won't ever turn back.


17. Chapter Sixteen

The heat attacked my throat. The lack of oxygen flowing through my lungs didn't make it any easier. My lips pressed against the opening of the trunk sucking in the air just trying not to pass out.

Wanting to yell for Harry, I decided not to out of fright. What if I were to yell and he decided to shoot at the sound? What if he ran and completely abandoned me? I was trapped in a darkness of thought. All the pressure of confusion and fear fell onto my lips shutting them tight. Closing my eyes I tried to block out the world. But it didn't work.

The car trunk popped open then stayed in half open position waiting for someone to lift it all the way. A dirty hand slid under, their nails filled with dirt. My eyes went wide and I held my breath hoping they (in someway) would change their mind just assuming no one was underneath. I may not of known who it was, I knew it would possibly be Harry. Someone I was terrified to see at this moment.

The trunk fully opened and the sun attacked my eyes blinding me. Covering the sun with my hand I tried focusing on the figure in front of me. Gaining it fully; it was definitely Harry.

His face was rough; lip bruised, faded purple circled around his right eye, a cut on the middle of cheek. His hair was straight on his head but the ends curled like crazy. It was just brushing over his eyebrows, I was surprised that his hair grew that fast. He was in the same outfit I saw him in last; a red button up flannel, but now it was almost fully unbuttoned, and his ripped black skinny jeans. Looking into his eyes they were filled with guilt, and regret.

I forgot how his eyes made me melt, how important he was to me. How one look from him could change my entire world. But i didn't feel like I was even on earth when I looked at him.

His eyes that I couldn't look away from; now filled with tears and face wrinkled up. He covered his face with his hands as he began to sob hard in front of me. I immediately sat up and pulled him into my arms. I wanted to fight it but I then started to weep with him.

"I didn't mean to Emma, I didn't mean to shoot him. I didn't know I would I just blacked out. I blacked out and when I came back he was gone. I didn't mean to Emma, I'm sorry." He pushed through his tears with his head buried into my now wet shoulder.

I didn't know what to say. I would say 'it's okay, I know, it's okay' but it wasn't okay. Harry killed someone. I decided to stay quiet and let him spill out his emotions. So we stood there for a few minutes as he did.

"We have to get out of here! No I can't stay here. I must go." He said with alarm lifting his head from off my shoulder.

He grabbed my wrist and walked towards a bridge that held up a main road. We were in a quiet area that had an abandon train track nearby. No big buildings or activity arouse around us, just concrete ground with weeds growing through the cracks. The bridge was tall; all that was visible was the roof of cars passing. The perfect area for something like this to happen and go unseen.

"Where are we going?" I asked a little concerned Harry didn't even know the answer to that.

"There's a gate over here, just a little pass the bridge. Theres a Mexican spot I know. Zayn said he would meet me here so we could go looking for you, but that task has been fulfilled." He said flat but tried to bring humor into his voice. In this situation, I don't see anything particularly funny.

"So did you plan this Harry?" I asked still walking with his hand around my wrist. Continuing I stopped; "Did you plan to kill him?" Jerking my hand out of his grip crossing my arms.

Looking back at me he became impatient looking around us making sure no on was following, "Emma can we talk about this later?" He asked then began walking again.

I stayed where I was, not moving an inch. I knew no one was going to catch us. If someone called the cops they would be here by now. I wasn't scared, so I waited. Swiftly looking back he saw I didn't move, then turned to face me.

"Emma common!" He said walking towards me holding out his hand. But I stayed standing there waiting.

"Fine! Yes I did. I planned to crash into him and kill him. But I didn't know I would. I didn't think I would actually pull that trigger, but I did." He said breaking our eye contact, I could see the pain he was feeling. It was painted brightly on his face.

Slowly I began to walk. He exhaled deeply and grabbed my hand. But now with sincerity, and I held onto it tightly.

"Did you know Zay-" I began to ask but he interrupted with a nod.

"That night he called me when I was with you, that's when he told me. Now I didn't know Louis was going to beat me down or send someone to molest you. But it was that, or he was going to do something even worst." His voice shook.

We approached a gate that was bent open and rusty, it was low but we could get through. Harry grabbed it pulling the loose flap up so I could crawl under, then he followed but without my help. Just as I stood up I spotted the restaurant. Outside I saw Zayns black, shiny car in the parking lot. The place was small and mustard yellow. The windows were dirty and filled with giant numbers advertising the price of different foods. If the open sign was not showing; I would easily assume this place was shut down.

We walked up and through the door. A bell jingled and instantly we were greeted by an older, bigger Mexican lady. I smiled at her and followed Harry into the back.

The place was muggy and dark. Mexican music quietly played and Plants filled every flat surface available. Dust filled the air which was easily revealed through the small rays of light that fought through.

Looking around Zayn caught my eyes and his were hard on mine. I felt a brush of anger towards him but I tried my best to smile so he wouldn't feel so bad. His chest rose and fell giving a sigh of relief then stood up walking over to us.

"Great to see you in one piece mate." Zayn said grabbing Harry's hand to shake but then took him into a big hug.

Harry just laughed in reply then cleared his throat. There was no denying or covering up the pain he showed on his face. This will never leave mind, he will always feel the guilt. Standing alone I looked down giving a fake smile but relaxed my face into a frown. Raising my eyes I saw the table Zayn was sitting at. He had a glass of untouched water on the dirty, white table. Looking at the green chair I walked over and sat in it while they chatted.

"Okay I think we should get out of here." Harry said walking over placing his hand on my shoulder. I just looked up into his eyes and nodded.

Zayn was already opening the restaurant door slowly walking outside.

"¡Adios!" The lady said goodbye and we walked out the door.

Now outside kept my eyes to the concrete floor letting my them adjust. We approached Zayns tinted window black car. I observed my face; a dark spot on the side of my cheek where Louis hit me, and giant bags of heavy exhaustion laid under my eyes.

Something distant then caught my attention.

The two cars far past the bridge were now engulfed in flames. The waves of invisible heat surrounded the area making everything distorted. A figure was near the cars, but a bit distant watching them burn. Green shirt and light blue bottoms were the colors that came from the distant human. Black smoke filled the air.

"Look!" I shouted pointing towards the scene which didn't seem to fully capture their attention; they both looked with no interest.

"Oh wow Niall got here quick," Zayn said under his breath but loud enough to hear. Harry nodded opening the passenger side door.

"I though Niall was is Ireland?" I asked with a strong demand in my voice, something I have never heard come out of me before.

No one answers me. They both just got into the car closing their doors. I now stand outside alone. All this stress and confusion is making me go mad. Emotion grew strong in my gut and I debated if I should run or follow them into the car. I'm not the one in trouble, well I think I'm not anymore since Louis is gone. I could easily go back home and forget all about this mess. I lov- ... I mean, I like Harry but this is so overwhelming.

"Babe," Harry had opened his door and I dashed a look at him. One hand was on the inside door handle, and the other gripping my hand.

Something wet landed on my cheek as I gazed into his eyes. But I just ignored it. So much has fallen from these brown eyes, so much it doesn't matter anymore. So I took a beep breath and got into the car.

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