I keep tossing and turning in my bed. They sent me home after I complained about being able to say in Allison's room any longer. So here I am now, laying down in my bed. Trying (but failing) to sleep.
I haven't had a proper good nights rest in a long time. Even before she went into the hospital.
When I was still trying to figure out my feelings for her.
I squeeze my eyes shut, hoping it'll be enough and I'll will my self to sleep....
Clearly I fell asleep at some point last night. I groan rolling over so my face is buried in my pillow more as I try to block out the annoying ringing sound in my ears.
After a few seconds of it still going, I growl some not so nice words and see it's my phone ringing, I glare as I pick it up.
"What?" I snap.
I can literally feel Calum roll his eyes at me through the phone. "I think you should come to the hospital."
I rub my face as I sit up and realize that I didn't even change clothes last night. Smooth Irwin.
"Yeah. Okay I'll be right there." I say and hang up. He doesn't need to try and persuade me to go, I'll go anyway.
Just as I pull on a new pair of pants, there's a knock on my door. I run my hand through my messy curly hair and open it, still not dressed only in my jeans that I still haven't done up yet.
On the other side is Violet. Well fuck. I totally forgot about her.... Don't ask me how.
"Ashton. I- I'm so worried." She says, makeup running down her face.
What am I suppose to do- oh right. I'm her boyfriend. Forgot about that to....
I open my arms and she falls into them sobbing. I pet her head as she cries into my chest.
"Hey it's okay. What's wrong babe?" Babe? Really. Okay. Right. Still her boyfriend.
"Allison. I'm just. I don't." She sobs and I feel my heart clench at the mention of Allison.
"It's okay. I'd love to stay and comfort you but I have to go, I'm sorry." I say and I kiss her head for good measures.
She sniffles and looks up at me with pink puffy eyes. "Okay. I just needed a hug. That's all." She leans in and kisses me, kinda shocking me not gonna lie.
I close my eyes and kiss her back, as she try's to deepen it, flashes of Allison in the hospital (and just her in general) make me stop and lightly push Violet back.
She looks hurt by my rejection. "I've got to get some where. I'm sorry." I say pushing her off me so she's just on the couch with a shocked expression.
She sighs, running her hand through her blonde hair that's actually messy right now.
I grab my shirt and throw it on and I do up my pants. I slip in my black VANs and I grab my wallet, phone, headphones and yeah that's about it.
I open the door and I look back at Violet, telling her through my actions: get the fuck out.
She groans and walks out the door after slipping on her pink Flats. She leaves in her car and I leave in my car in the other direction that she went.
You'd think that she'd go see how her sister is.
I turn on the radio and frown at the song. Boulevard Of Broken Dreams by Green Day.
Don't get me wrong I love the song, but just not in this situation.
I pull up to the hospital after tons of sad songs (every station I turned it to played a damn sad song) and I park my car and get out, taking my time because I know nothing probably changed.
I walk in the doors and see Calum chatting on his phone in a hushed voice.
I walk over to him and clear my throat. He looks up at me and a look I can't read the expression on his face.
He stands up and starts dragging me down the hall and towards Allison's room.
"Dude, what the hell- stop. What are you doing?" I ask and we finally stop in front of her door. Calum turns to me.
"I- uh. I think you want to see this....." He says (I can see a smug smile under his blank expression....) then pats my shoulder before walking back down the hall and I can feel my hands get sweaty.
What happened? Is she okay?
I put my hand on the door handle and slowly turn it, taking in a deep breath.
My eyes automatically go to the figure on the bed, last I saw she was knocked out due to the blood lose. Now she's stirring apple sauce with a grossed grimace on her face.
I gasp and her head shoots up in my direction. Her eyes go wide and I feel my eyes start to water.
"A-Allison." I mange to get out.
Wait. Hold up. What if she doesn't remember me? What if she's got amnesia or something.....
"Ashton.....?" She mouths and I break out into a smile.
I quickly run over to her and hug the shit out of her making her gasp in pain and I pull away just as quick.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, I swear." I say motioning to her.
She looks around and grabs a notebook and a pen.
She smiles and writes. "It's okay I never said I wanted you to stop hugging me."
A giant grin takes over my face as I hug her again and she laughs. "God I've missed you, you have known idea how much it hurt me to see you like this." I pull back looking her in the eyes.
She lets out a shaky breath and averts her gaze to somewhere else and with shaky hands writes again. "I think I have a feeling and if your here to yell at me about trying to kill myself, save it. Calum already beat you to it."
I let out a forced chuckle. "Right. I'll have to thank Calum for both of those things. Saving me air and me not having to yell at you."
She smiles weakly and looks down at her pale hands. I reach over and take her much smaller hand in mine and bring it to my lips, kissing it.
"So who's all been here already?" I ask.
She sighs, scribbling down. "My parents have been here already but no sign of Violet."
I squeeze her hand. "I saw her before I came here." She looks at me confused.
"She came over crying about you." She gives me an even more confused look making me sigh. "I'm still her boyfriend."
She nods her head and takes her hand away from mine and runs it through her hair looking paler then before and a little depressed if I must be honest.
"Hey. You okay?" I ask placing my hand on her shoulder but she cringes away. I feel a pang of hurt in my chest but I try to brush it off.
"Allison? Please say something." I practically beg but she just looks down at her hands that are clasp together shakily in her lap.
The door opens and Calum's head pops in and he smiles when he sees Allison.
"Al, hey. How you feeling?" Calum asks shutting the door behind him as he makes his way over to us.
She gives him a weak smile. "Still not talking?" I give him a confused look.
"What do you mean she's not talking?" I ask glancing between Allison and Calum.
Calum sighs when Allison looks out the window. "She won't talk. Ever sense she woke up. I'm the only that's been in here besides you and her parents."
"Really?" I thought that the other boys would have been here already. That and her own sister.
"So no sign of Violet?" I ask Alli but Calum answers.
"Nope. No show on the sis yet." He says as his phone goes off, "Luke and Michael are on there way."
Allison nods her head playing with her fingers. "Why?" I blurt out before I can even stop myself.
Calum raises his eyebrows at me and Allison looks taken back. "What? What do you mean wh- oh." Calum nods his head in understanding.
She grabs the note book and begins writing. "Because." That's all it says.
I gap at her in disbelief. "Bullshit Allison."
She sighs. "I want to go home."
I nod my head. "Well we'll see when we can take you hom-"
She shakes her head smacking my arm. "I want to go to my real home."
I look into her eyes to see tears, pain and Calum looks shocked and about to burst into tears.