Another morning means another day of hell, I wish I just didn't have to wake up in the morning I dread seeing my dad, he's usually drunk or hungover from the night before and when I get home I get my ass kicked for doing absolutely nothing at all and to top it all off after my beatings I have to clean the whole damn mess up, broken glass and shit is everywhere.
When I'm done getting ready for school I walk down stairs and I peek around the corner to see if my dad is there, he's sleeping on the couch with beer bottles all around him, I let out a sigh and I quietly walk to go retrieve my backpack and I hastily walk to the door and run out of the house
I'm not going to lie I'm actually terrified of the man that I call my father, I act tough though because I can't let him see me cry or else I will look weak and hopeless, I want to show him that I'm not and I can handle him.
As I walk to school I think about my life and how terrible it is but I'm still smiling, I still act happy like nothing can bother me, but that's a lie because everything bothers me. I'm living a lie, my life is a lie. I sigh and pick up my pace so I can get to school faster.
When I arrive to school I see Luke so I quickly run up to him and tap his shoulder, and he jumps a bit "oh sorry, did I scare you?" I ask with a slight frown as he nods "so...you wanna skip school with me today?" I ask with a little bit of hope in my voice, he looks at me and starts writing on the notebook that he held in his hand and handed it to me and I read it "sure, I'm probably going to get in loads of trouble but what the hell...let's go!"
I smiled really big and grabbed his wrist and I pulled him to the back of of the school where I hid skateboards in a hole in the wall "you know how to ride a skateboard Luke?" I asked with a bit of curiosity In my voice and he nodded and smiled, I think that's the first time that I've seen him genuinely smile. We skated all the way to a near by Starbucks and I bought Luke a vanilla bean drink and I got the same but I asked for chocolate chips in it, "so Luke, is this your first time skipping school?" He nodded "oh so you're a good boy...I see...well we should do something about that...let's be crazy together!" I urged him to try something crazy he started writing on the notebook that was still in his hand "try something crazy...like what?" He wrote and I nonchalantly responded "tattoos?" He looked with wide eyes and started scribbling more words across the paper "how will we do that? We can't do that without a parents permission!" I read it and simply answered "I know a place where we can get fake ID's" he nodded and we left Starbucks and skated to get our fake ID's.
Ashton and I are at the fake ID place and it looks really sketchy, it's like an old beat down abandoned building, I'm not so sure about this place but I'll do it so ash will be happy.
After we get out of that sketchy fake ID place we skate to a tattoo shop and my nerves go up and I feel like I'm going to have an anxiety attack, but I keep my cool for Ashton's sake. As soon as we walk in I instantly tense up and freeze right where I was standing "ya alright Luke?" Ashton asks me sounding a bit concerned I just nod my head slightly I can feel my heartbeat pick up and it's racing so fast i feel like it's going to burst right out of my chest, I'm getting dizzy and I feel like I'm going to pass out or throw up, or both!
"What can I do for you boys?" The tattoo artist asks, this man looks big and scary he has tons of tattoos and piercings. I hear ashton clear his throat and say "yeah, we're here to get tattoos." He sounds so timid and his voice was a little shaky but he tried to hide it, he's just as scared as I am.
"Can I see your ID's?" The large tattooed man asks we both pull out our fake ID's and show it to the man "alright what do you two want?" He asks with a very deep voice I nudge ashton a bit letting him know that I'm not going first.
Ashton takes a seat in the chair and he tells the man what he wants and where he wants it and I sit on a chair off to the side and I start sketching the quote that I want to get, I hear ashton say "can I get the quote 'music is my escape from the bullshit in life' on my right arm?" And the man nods and starts on his tattoo, I can see that he's in pain so I stand up from where I'm seated and I walk over to him and I grab his hand so he can squeeze it Every time he feels pain, he quickly squeezes it and i wince from pain "sorry, thanks for doing this though" I just smile and nod
When his tattoo is finished the man puts some clear gel stuff on his arm and wraps his arm up in plastic wrap and he says "you're next, what do you want and where do you want it?" I hand him a piece of paper with my sketch on it and it has a quote that says "the quietest people have the loudest minds" and I point to my back right where my shoulder blade is to indicate where I want the tattoo. Ashton holds my hand like I did when he was getting his tattoo, I like holding his hand, it makes me feel safe and secure, when I'm with him he makes me feel like I'm never alone and I never will be alone.
As soon as the tattoo is finished he does the same thing he did to Ashton's tattoo and we pay and leave the place he turns to me and says "I'm glad we did this, I like hanging out with you even if it is painful." I giggle and nod and all of a sudden I speak out loud without thinking "getting tattoos hurts like hell!"
Ashton looks at me with a shocked expression and I have a shocked expression as well "did you just speak?!?" Ashton exclaimed I cover my mouth with my hand and nod "Luke, How long has it been since you stopped talking?" Ashton asks with curiosity in his voice I go to pull out paper but he stops me "no Luke, speak again...I like hearing your voice, after having one sided conversations with you it actually feels nice hearing you speak back." He says in a calm tone
"it's been two and a half years since I stopped talking" I say in a barely audible tone "two and a half years?!? Wow Luke that's awesome that I'm the first person you've talked to in two and a half years!" He exclaimed and I just nod "what made you stop talking Luke?" He asks me and my eyes start to water a bit and he notices "oh Luke, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." Ashton says quietly "no, I want to tell you." I say quietly with my voice all shaky and he nods urging me to speak "well it all started when I was really young, in elementary school all of the kids would make fun of me for being too ugly or too fat." I stop talking and I take a shaky breath and continue "this all carried on into middle school and it was the same shit but it got worse, everyone hated me for no reason and they laughed at me for everything I did." I felt hot tears streaming down my face but I continued "just a few years ago, about two and a half years to be exact, I started getting beat up because...because I-I'm g-gay." I said full on sobbing now and breathing heavily.
"Oh Luke, it's okay...it's fine" ashton cooed pulling me in for a hug and i winced because he touched my tattoo but I dismissed it like it was no big deal and I can feel tears on my shoulder, ashton is crying too. I pull away and wipe away his fresh tears, he pulled me back into a hug, "Ash, I-I don't k-know how they found out that I was g-gay, I don't get it...n-not even my p-parents know!" I exclaimed still sobbing Into Ashton's chest while clenching my fists onto his shirt. "I don't know...Luke I'm here now, and I'm not leaving you...I will always be here...I will be here through everything" he whispered into my ear trying to get me to calm down. "Promise?" I whispered back "I promise, Lukey" he whispered back to me "I like the nickname, ashy" I said now calmed down and breathing normal and then I realized...we were standing out in the open and people were staring at us.
THATS CHAPTER THREE MY LITTLE PENGUINS! What do you think? I was listening to "same love" by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis (feat. Mary Lambert). Bye bye for now penguins!