When I woke up the next morning, I was having mixed emotions as I realized that it was my last full day living in America before I moved back to England tomorrow. I wasn’t going to think about that today though. I was just going to have a great day today with my family.
Yesterday my aunt told me that her and Ben had the whole day planned out for today. I was glad that we were all actually going to do something instead of spending the day moping that I wouldn’t be with them much more longer. That is probably what we’d be doing tomorrow. Whenever I was upset about having to leave my aunt and cousin though, I just had to continue to remind myself that there was really nothing else for me here.
Nothing was working out and my dad was only going to get mad at me if I stayed here and wasn’t on the hockey team. When I moved back home, I could get back on a supportive hockey team and I was going to get to see my mum and my sister again. I could just video chat my aunt and Ben and try and visit them when I could. I knew that that wasn’t going to be the same, but it was better than nothing. I picked up one of the shirts and pair of jeans that I had left out of my suitcase to wear. I only had one more pair of clothes that weren’t packed into my suitcase yet, to wear tomorrow.
When I headed downstairs after getting ready, I walked into the kitchen where I expected my aunt to be making breakfast, but she wasn’t in sight. There weren’t any ingredients or dishes or anything that she uses to make breakfast out either. I knew she couldn’t still be asleep, she always gets up early. I went back to the living room, but when no one was there, I had an idea of where she might be.
I opened the door to the dining room, and just as I thought when I walked in I saw my aunt. What I wasn’t expecting though was to see Ben with her already awake. Both of them were seated at the table with a few plates of different breakfast foods in front of them. I should’ve known that my aunt was going to make be a big breakfast this morning.
As much as I appreciated that, and the fact that Ben got up to help, I was kid of hoping we could just have a normal breakfast at the kitchen counter like always because I really enjoyed them. This was really nice of them though, the only reason I wanted to eat in the kitchen like we usually did was because eating in the dining room was really only for certain occasions, and it just reminded me even more that this was one of the last breakfasts I was going to eat with them.
Sure there was tomorrow morning, but it was going to be rushed since I had to be at the airport pretty early.
Nevertheless, I smiled at them when they both realized that I had come in, and I sat down at the table with them.
As we were eating, they began to tell be about all the things they had planned for the day and what all we were going to do. I was glad that neither of them mentioned the fact that they were doing all this because I was leaving tomorrow.
I think the three of us really just had an unspoken agreement that we weren’t going to bring that up, and I was completely okay with that.
After breakfast, all of us were already dressed and ready since we were obviously excited about the things planned today. We brought the dishes into the kitchen where my aunt said she would wash them later because she wanted us to have as much time as possible today.
Once we did that we discussed what we wanted to do first today. I was really up for anything right now, so I let Ben decide. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do first, so the three of us just got into my aunt’s car and drove to the city where we were going to spend most of the day, and we would just decide what to do when we got there.
It took a little less than an hour to get into the city. It would’ve been quicker, but we made the mistake of heading there during rush hour so there was a ton of traffic that we had to sit in. Since we had all that time though we had decided what all we wanted to do. My aunt and Ben had already planned a bunch of places we could go, it was just a matter of figuring out what we wanted to do first and what order we wanted to do everything in.
The Sear’s Tower was the first thing on our list so that’s where my aunt headed. She had chosen for us to go into the big urban area of Chicago today because for the however many months I have been here, I never go to see any of the landmarks or attractions that Chicago was known for. So naturally I was pretty excited for all of this. Ben had never been to the tower either, so we were both excited to go to the top.
My aunt told us that it was one of the tallest buildings in the country and it had 108 stories. She pointed it out to Ben and I as we drove up to it and she found a place to park the car. When we got out of the car, Ben and I looked at the tower and tried to look at the top without the sun shining in our eyes.
I woke up the next morning and the first thing I saw was that plastic bag sitting on my dresser with the face wash that I bought last night that I didn’t even need. I had bought a whole new bottle when I went shopping with Bella the other week, and now I had another bottle of it.
I still couldn’t believe that I had actually driven to Harry’s house last night. I couldn’t believe that I actually thought I was going to be able to talk to him. I feel like I have so much confidence to do something until I’m actually about to do it. Yet at that moment I was surprised that I didn’t think I was going to be able to do it, and now I don’t even know why I thought I could in the first place.
He didn’t want to listen to me, he didn’t care about what I had to say, I felt like he’s already made it obvious that he wants nothing to do with me anymore and I can’t say I blame him. I shouldn’t even go back and try to fix things with him now anyway because I wasn’t even sure what my dad would think if I did. I really didn’t feel like getting out of bed this morning, but I had to get up and go to practice, even though I knew I might not get much practice done.
In a way I wished that Harry would just hurry up and leave so I don’t have to keep arguing with myself if I should go and talk to him or not, he’d be gone so I’d have to live with whatever I decided. Harry was leaving tomorrow and I really wished that I could just see him one more time since after that I knew I wasn’t ever going to see him again.
Why couldn’t he just come to the rink one more time while I was there so I could go up and talk to him then instead of having the never ending battle with myself about whether I should go see him and if I had enough confidence to do so.
By now pretty much everyone at the rink that knew Harry knew that he was leaving and it was weird hearing some people talking about it. A few people have come up to me to ask me about him, but I just ignored them because I knew that most of them were the people that said rude comments to Harry and I when they all found out about us.
This week I had also been making an effort to leave the rink as fast as I could after practice, especially since the hockey guys had come in there when I fell asleep. Most of it was because they kept asking me about Harry and I couldn’t get it through their minds that I didn’t know anything about his situation, we weren’t on speaking terms.
My dad wasn’t informed that Harry was leaving though, so he didn’t know why I was kind of in an off mood this week with worry. I didn’t feel the need to tell him because I really didn’t want him to think that I was still talking to him or anything like that. I eventually made myself get out of bed and get ready for today.
I couldn’t seem to shake the thought that today was Harry’s last day here, yet I’m pretty sure that he wasn’t going to have any thoughts of me today, and I wished that I wouldn’t care about that, but I did. I broke up with him, I shouldn’t still be thinking of him but I am, I didn’t want to stop dating him, yet I did.