Equal Ice

I’m a performer, but I don’t act on a regular stage.
I dress up in costumes, but I don’t play a character.
My stage isn’t one in a theater; it’s clean slick ice at a rink.
I don’t play a character, I’m just myself.
Sometimes on the ice though, I feel like I’m someone else. Someone who is graceful and beautiful, it’s still me though, just a different side of me. A side that I like much more than my everyday self.
Ice skating is much more work than people may think though, and some people don’t consider it a sport. It’s not as extreme as hockey for example.
I may not look very tough, but I can accelerate faster than the guys on the racetrack.
I take harder impacts than a rider being thrown from a bull.
And I handle more G-Force than a fighter pilot.
So why just be extreme, when you can be extremely graceful.


120. Chapter 120

Chapter 120

Harry’s POV

My aunt had come back into the living room a few minutes later holding a mug with steam rising from the top. She handed me the mug before she sat down on the chair, and I saw that the contents inside the cup was tea. I thanked her before I took a sip, and sat myself up more on the couch that I had been lying down on.

“So you ready to tell me what happened?” she finally asked me.

I nodded and set the mug down on the coffee table so I wouldn’t be tempted to interrupt my self to drink some of the tea. I needed to just get all this out without any interruptions or distractions. I was kind of hoping that she would start out with another question to ask me to get me going on talking about this, but I knew that she was going to let me start on my own.

It took me a few moments to just relax and calm myself a bit more before I started to pretty much relive one of the worst moments of my life that hardly happened an hour ago. I couldn’t seem to register and of my words or thoughts though. I wanted to say something but I just couldn’t.

“Harry? You okay?” my aunt asked, noticing that it was taking me awhile to respond to her, and I’m guessing that my face showed that I was in a deep thought and worry and stress, and I was pretty much feeling every not so good emotion right now.

I nodded to her, that seeming to be the only way I could communicate right now.

“Harry,” she said, her tone a bit more serious than before,

“Just let it all out, I’m here to listen to you,” she assured me.

I of course nodded again before taking a deep breath and beginning to speak.

I started by telling her about when I first walked into the rink earlier today, and the encounter with Bella. That part was easy to tell her and probably not very important, but it got me started on telling my aunt everything. What happened next was the part that I wasn’t sure if I could get through talking about and reliving. I explained to my aunt about how I had begun my apology just like she had told me, but then got cut off by Gabrielle.

“She said that she was breaking up with me,” I finally told her, and the look on her face was unreadable, I couldn’t tell what she was thinking or what her actually reaction or thought was towards this.

“She broke up with me,” I repeated, saying it more to myself this time, seeing how the words sounded out loud again, still not being able to believe that they were true.

“She did?” my aunt asked, I could tell that she maybe wasn’t exactly sure what to say in this situation, but she had a lot of sympathy in her voice.

“What happened after she did it?” she asked me.

I began to explain to her what Gabrielle had told me and what said to her. I explained that I kept trying to reason with Gabrielle and tell her that we could work through this, but of course she wasn’t listening to any of since she already had her mind made up and she didn’t care anymore.

“Did she tell you why she came to this decision?” my aunt asked me.

“Yeah,” I said.

I then began to explain to her what Gabrielle had told me about her dad and Bella.

“She told me that in order to fix her relationship with her best friend and her dad, she was going to have to break the one she had with me,” I told her.

My aunt had a look of shock on her face, the same look I probably had when I first heard Gabrielle’s reasoning too.

“I tried to tell her that maybe if the two of them just got to know me, maybe they’d like me. But she was so determined to fix this her own way that seemed the easiest to her,” I explained,

“I feel like I should have made more of an effort to meet her dad earlier on,” I added.

“Harry even if you had made an effort earlier to meet her dad, she still wouldn’t have let you,” my aunt told me.

“I just feel like I ruined everything,” I said out loud instead of just keeping that thought inside my head like I had before.

“Don’t say that Harry, none of this is your fault. If Gabrielle can’t see what an amazing guy you are and how determined you are to make everything work out for her, then she doesn’t deserve you,” she told me,

“This is Gabrielle’s battle with her dad and she has chosen this situation to fight it. I’m not saying it’s the best option for her to choose, because it isn’t. I think you just need to give her some time to get through this, and maybe when she’s ready, you two can cross paths again. But I don’t ever want to hear you blame yourself for this, because it is in no way your fault,” she told me.

I wanted to believe her, I wanted to see that every word she just said was true, but I just couldn’t make myself go along with it whether it was true or not. I couldn’t help but blame myself for this, even if it maybe wasn’t my fault.

I already convinced myself enough times that I caused all of this, and once your mind is already convinced that something is true, it’s not always easy to change the thoughts you already had on the subject and what you believe is the truth.

My aunt and I talked for a while longer before I finally decided that I was done talking for the day, and my aunt understood. Just as I was getting up from the couch and was about to head my room, my aunt stopped me.

“Did you inform your coach that you were going to be missing practice?” she asked me, remembering that I’m not usually home at this time. It was weird hearing her call him coach considering that they were dating and all.

“No,” I sighed, “Could you?”

“Yeah,” she said and nodded, and then I continued to head to my room.

I never really thought about having to tell my coach that I wasn’t going to practice, I had been at the point where it never occurred to me, and I just wanted out of the rink and away from everyone.

I knew that going to my room by myself and not talking to my aunt any longer was probably a bad idea since I would be stuck alone with my own thoughts, but maybe that is what was best for me right now.

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