I stopped blushing immediately and excused myself from the table. I walked away, and when they couldn't see me anymore, I ran to the room I woke up in, and plopped down, softly crying. Josh must have figured out what happened because he came in, pulled me into a hug, and kissed me on the forehead. He sat down and sat me up too, talking to me and stroking my hair to comfort me.
"He's not a good guy. I should have told you that I didn't trust him, This is all my fault and I'm the reason that you're crying now." Josh said. I felt so super freaking bad. I couldn't let him take the blame for this. So, I told him,
"Josh, it's not you're fault. Don't take the blame. I'M the fool. I'M the one who should have never gone out with him in the first place. And now, I'M the one who will regret it for the rest of MY life. Don't you ever blame yourself for MY mistake. Live your life. Don't regret something I did. It's MY fault. But I thank you for your concern." I tried to pull a smile, but Josh knew me way too well to buy it.
"You can cry if you need to. I'll leave you to your tears if you want. You don't have to pretend to smile. At least not in front of me." Josh said. He pulled me into me into one last hug and left.
Yes, I'm listening, I know. I just don't trust him with her.....alone......in one room......with no supervision. Oh god. I heard her crying and telling Josh that she's a fool and that she never should have never gone out with this person in the first place and that she'll regret it for the rest of her life. Is this person me? Does she really hate me? My thoughts were interrupted when Josh said that she didn't have to pretend to smile......at least not in front of him. Does that mean she fakes her happiness in front of me? I started to tell myself that I was being negative and that it was all a misunderstanding. It wasn't working. I think she really does hate me and that she'd be better off with somebody else. Josh opened the door and left, heading back to the table. I rushed to the bathroom and turned on the sink so josh would think I was washing my hands, I decided not to waste water, so I actually did wash my hands. When I was done, I went to our room and saw Raven lying there, crying really hard. I shut the door and sat down, stroking her hair.
"Josh, is that you?" She asked. I wonder why she would think I was Josh.
"No." I said. "It's me, Niall." She turned around and her face was really wet and really red. She lied down correctly, her head on the pillow, and patted down the seat next to her. I sat down next to her and stroked her hair as she put her head on her chest.
"You wouldn't mind if I put my head here, would you?" She asked.
"You wouldn't mind if I put my head here, would you?" I asked.
"Of course not." He said. We lied down for several minutes before we headed out to eat. When we got to the table, everything was cleared off except for our plates, and everybody was on the couch about to watch a movie.