It felt so right, but at the same time it felt so wrong.
I loved being with Cameron, he made me laugh.
Maybe it was just ment to be us two.
I sure hoped so.
We were all alone on Cameron, Nash, Hayes and Matthew's room,
everyone else left for some kinda fun park.
We just wanted to be here, together. Where nobody knew what we were doing.
I loved looking at him. He was so pretty.
We were laying in Cameron's bed.
"Cameron?" I felt his warm arms around my cold body.
He looked down at me. "Yeah?"
I got up.
He looked at me, like something had happened.
He lay down on his back and smiled at me.
I sat on top of him and held my hands on his chest.
"I want you to do something for me" He slided his hands up and down my legs.
"Anything for you"
I looked down at him.
"I want you to be my first" He looked scared at me.
"But Ava. you should do it with someone youre inlove with" He looked pretty scared.
I smiled and got closer to his face.
I pressed my lips against he's and looked at him again.
"I am" He smiled.
I ran my fingers through his silky light brown hair and got down to kiss him again.
I wanted to go all the way with Cameron, i loved him and i really wanted him to take my virginaty.
I trusted him, and i felt save with him.
I still had my sex scares, but i was sure everything was going to be okay.
with Cameron, everything was.
I got down to his neck and started kissing him, slowly and soft.
I heard him moan.
It sounded so cute.
What was she doing?
It felt so good and it made it tickle in my pants, but i couldnt.
It wasnt right, i loved Ava, but i couldnt do it to her.
She should do it with someone who didnt have another girlfriend.
Someone who was loyal to her.
The last thing i was right now, was loyal. Specially to Julie....
"Ava, stop it" I tried to push her a bit away.
She stopped and looked at me.
"What's wrong?" She looked kinda worried.
"It's not right" I looked at her.
"What? But im so ready and i want you to be my first" She smiled.
Oh i loved her smile, it lighted up my intire world. I know ive said it before but its so true.
"I know, and that is so sweet of you to trust me with that, but we cant" I made her smile go away..
that was a terrible feeling...
"Dont you want me? Not even when im sitting right here, on top of you?"
She got water in her eyes.
"Ofcourse i do, you have no idea about how much i want you right now" She smiled.
"Then lets do it" She started taking her shirt off.
She had a red bra on, it was kinda cute.
"Please take on your shirt again" I looked away.
She pulled her shirt on again and looked mad.
"What is wrong with you Cam? I thought you wanted me..."
I looked away.
"We cant" She got up and took on her shoes.
"Why? am i not beautiful enough for you?"
She started crying.
She was overreacting it a bit.
"What?" i sat up.
I took hold of my shirt which was laying on the bed.
"I knew it. i cant compete with Julie. She is so much prettier than me"
i got up and threw my shirt at the ground in anger.
"Stop saying that! It's not true!" I took hold of her arm.
"Ava, you're the most beautiful girl i've ever known"
She looked away.
"Im not beautiful enough for you to have sex with me."
She still looked away.
"Ofcourse youre beautiful enough"
She looked at me, angry and tears running down her cheeks as she was trying to hold them back.
"THEN WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?" She yelled a bit.
"Nothing is wrong with you Ava!"
She wripped her arm free and looked dissapointed at me.
"Fuck you Cameron" She walked pretty fast out of the room and smasked the door in my face as i was trying to run after her....