I wish I felt nothing. It would be better, easier. I bit my tongue to keep from screaming as hot tears dribbled down my face. I covered my face with my hands and rocked back and forth, trying to calm down. It didn't help. My lungs tightened as I gasped for air. I was ashamed of myself for breaking down, for not being strong but I just couldn't fight it anymore. My phone buzzed on my bedside table but I ignored it. I just wanted to be alone, to dwell on my misery. I wondered what would happen if I just disappeared, if anyone would even notice. There was no point in trying anymore. No point in living or even breathing. He was gone.