When you lose someone you care about nothing else matters in the world; your world becomes one big black hole, you lose all the happiness in your body, mind, soul and spirit.

Hayden Rivers was always the shy type who was always with her older brother, their bond grew even closer when they were abandoned by their parents.

That all changes when her older brother (Ryan) dies and leaves her alone in the big, cruel world, she feels like an ant compared to everyone else and is lost with no sense of direction

At his funeral she doesn't expect to cross paths with Russell Scott

She witnesses him about to kill someone and that creates more problems in her already twisted life

Russell Scott is the most feared guy not only in their school but around the small town the live in; He has tattoos, deals, drugs, fights,
has anger issues that get him in a lot of trouble and his own skeletons in his closet.

No matter how many people tell her to stay away she just can't


49. Chapter 9

Apologies for the long wait.... a little emotional in this chapter xx thank you

 for being patient, please enjoy and leave feedback xx 

Russell walked into their room, where Hayden was lying down bundled up in grey sweat pants and a jumper. He was holding a cup of green tea. He sat down next to her and she sat up, leaning on the head board. She took the pink mug. Taking a sip, her throat was soar, from all the crying she had been doing since she received the news.

Russell placed a hand over Hayden’s. Hayden shook her head, avoiding his gaze. Russell wanted to say something, but he didn’t know what to say. “Hayden-”

“Russell, don’t worry about it, okay?” Hayden said, giving him a timid smile. Russell was going to say something but his phone started to ring. He looked at her one last time, but she was looking out the window already. It was raining again. “No Russell, I’m not sick or anything, you can go.” Hayden said flashing him a smile. A very weak one

Russell had gotten caught up in a busy schedule and only made it home at 9 o’clock. He got into their room and Hayden was already in bed and he assumed she was sleeping so he went to take a shower. When he came back he got into the sheets next to her, putting his arms round her waist so that he could pull her closer to him. He kissed her on her forehead, which was when he realised how damp her face was.

“Hayden” Russell said and he sat up turning her to him. Russell sat up, leaning on the headboard, and Hayden sat with her legs crossed in front of her. She was playing with the grey sleeves of her pyjama top. “Baby have you been crying all day?” The answer to his question was evident on her sore eyes and flushed face. Her nose was a bright pink. “Hayden why didn’t you call me?” This time he put a hand on her knee. She didn’t say anything and just wiped her face, still avoiding his eyes.

“My baby” she said, her voice was hoarse from all the crying she had done “It was mine Russell. Ours.” She started to sob “It’s all my fault, if I j-just listened” she was starting to sob more and he held her tighter

Russell asked, concern had taken over his face and his eyes fixed on hers “It’s not your fault baby don’t say that” he mumbled into her hair

She took in a deep breath to try and calm her eyes that were ready to pour out all the water her body contained. She had cried so much it now literally hurt to cry, her eyelids stinging with every tear that fell. Russell had never seen her cry so much. He felt the pain as well but needed to be strong for her.

He was so stupid for leaving her. Russell was upset because he couldn’t take away the pain she was feeling.

He hated to see her hurt. Hayden rested her head on his chest and his warm arm surrounded her. She felt the warmth of him surround her; he was the greatest comfort anyone could have given her. She loved him so much and all she had ever wanted was to marry him and start a family with him. “Hayden this isn’t the end, okay?” Russell said looking at her, she let out a tear and he felt it hit his t-shirt. Hayden was now at a stage of crying where she couldn’t sob, like she had done all afternoon, and was just letting the tears fall.

“Baby, we can make it through this. You’re the strongest person I know”

“Russell you don’t understand how much I want a family and now I can’t have it.” Hayden buried her head in Russell’s chest, and he took her hand.

“No one said you couldn’t Hayden, we will have that chance again baby” Russell said, this time moving so he could see her face. “I love you, baby, and it’s you and me no matter what.”

“I love you too” Hayden said, and he gave her a kiss on her forehead, just as she sank back into him, her arms wrapping around his waist. Russell ran a hand down her back, and they sat there for sometime quietly. The only sounds were the sounds of the falling rain and Hayden’s slow sniffles.

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