The moon light was creeping in through her curtains and she was too lazy to close the curtains despite the lightning and thunder
She lay on her side in the middle of the bed thinking about different thing that crossed her mind watching as the rain fell down harshly
The rest of the time she spent at Russell’s loft Hayden distanced herself from him.
The worst part was facing everybody else in the room when she walked out.
It had been a few days and she hadn’t seen him, she wasn’t mad at him but she was hurt and it wasn’t about her finding release but him punishing her in such a harrowing way.
She looked like she had fallen through bushes and tried to make herself look more presentable.
She heard loud moans and covered her head with her pillow...Sam and Josh where at it again and she knew they weren’t stopping anytime soon.
“You’ve been avoiding me” she heard a deep voice and sat up in her bed.
“Russell” she gasped, placing a hand on her heart “W-what are you doing here, how did you get in?”
“That doesn’t matter” he told her walking towards her bed with a slight limp, she stretched her arm out and turned on her bedside lamp
He was completely drenched, making a small puddle on her carpet
She noticed the cut on his lip and the long cut going down his handsome face from his eyebrow down to his cheek; she pushed the duvet off her body and ran towards him
“What the hell happened to you?” she asked him and he flinched when she touched the cut on his lip
“Just a miss understanding, I’m fine”
“You’re not fine Russell” she walked to her bathroom and came back out with a first aid kit “Take off your clothes I can put them in the dryer” she stretched out her hand
She could hear him shuffling with his clothes and a few seconds later his wet clothes where in her hands
“I will be right back stay here” where else will he go Hayden
When she got back into her room he was still there, he stared at her saying nothing at all
Hayden suddenly felt very insecure in the shorts and large t-shirt she was wearing
“Let me help you with that” she scratched the back of her neck.
Hayden was cleaning the cut and he closed his eyes releasing a groan that caught her attention
“Who started it?” she asked trying to make conversation
“Me” he simply answered
“You’re such an idiot”. She was mad
“I’ve been called worse” was his reply and she pressed the cloth harder making him hiss in pain
“What the hell is wrong with you Russell? Why would you pick a fight?” she was now yelling at him “I don’t want you fighting...I hate it when you do...did you even think about me?” his face became hard and he stood up abruptly, towering over her small frame
“You are the reason I was fighting in the first place”
“How was I-”
“Because you are constantly on my mind and I needed to remind myself that I was still me. This isn’t me. I don’t fall in love or have anything to do with it?”
“Why are you so afraid of loving me?” she raised her voice
“I have never experienced this thing called love Hayden and I told you from the start that I didn’t do this sort of thing”
“The night we made love which was the greatest night of my life to you was just a great fuck?” she asked him, her eyes started to water.
When he didn’t answer she stepped back
“When you said you loved me that was just you talking?” she asked him, a tear falling
“It was what you wanted to hear, Bambi I can’t be that guy” he explained
“Russell I didn’t ask you to be anyone but you” she told him “Please don’t do this to me” she knew she probably sounded pathetic but she felt conflicted.
Russell could hear the pain in her voice and didn’t look up at her