When you lose someone you care about nothing else matters in the world; your world becomes one big black hole, you lose all the happiness in your body, mind, soul and spirit.

Hayden Rivers was always the shy type who was always with her older brother, their bond grew even closer when they were abandoned by their parents.

That all changes when her older brother (Ryan) dies and leaves her alone in the big, cruel world, she feels like an ant compared to everyone else and is lost with no sense of direction

At his funeral she doesn't expect to cross paths with Russell Scott

She witnesses him about to kill someone and that creates more problems in her already twisted life

Russell Scott is the most feared guy not only in their school but around the small town the live in; He has tattoos, deals, drugs, fights,
has anger issues that get him in a lot of trouble and his own skeletons in his closet.

No matter how many people tell her to stay away she just can't


22. Chapter 22

Hayden curled her body on the small green couch

It was a long exhausting day and all she wanted to do was sleep and be left alone in peace. She was tired of hearing “I’m sorry’s”

She must have had the worst luck in the world; she was probably bound to misery.

“Hayden” she heard someone sob her name and she turned

“Hailey, Dan” she sat up smiling sadly as Adrianna’s parents stepped forward and hugged her tightly crying into the black dress she was wearing, her swollen face was no longer swollen but the bruises still visible

She shed a few tears of her own, the day was very gloomy, the Smokey coloured clouds not shifting.

Everyone was over at Adriana’s parent’s house, Burying her was the hardest part for Hayden, knowing no one would pop into her room in the morning

Most of all she couldn’t’ stop blaming herself for what happened.

Annabelle was a complete mess and didn’t speak to anybody the entire time she was at the funeral but Hayden took no offence to it.

Russell had been by her side the whole time and was currently speaking to someone on the phone

“Hayden” she saw Peyton and Jade standing in front of her

Hayden had no words for any of them at the moment and didn’t feel like crying anymore that day

She grabbed her crutches and started walking towards the door

“Hayden Please”

“Peyton please leave me alone and take that her with you” she snapped

“Excuse me?” Jade sneered “I’m only doing this for you Peyton and clearly she doesn’t want us here”

“Oh please jade don’t try to play victim here ok” Hayden spoke through gritted teeth “I didn’t expect you out of all people to do that to me”

“Oh come on Hayden I think it’s time you got what you deserve”

“Deserve?” Hayden repeated slowly “I deserve to have no family, no happiness?” she asked perplexed

“You stole him” she sneered


“No Peyton it’s about time she knew what was going on and stopped living in the little Russell bubble she’s been in for the past fucking months”

“Stole who?” Hayden asked so confused

“Russell, you knew I liked him” She honestly had no idea Jade liked him because every time she would mention his name she acted like a rabid animal

“How would I know that Jade?” she asked defeated

Jade was angry because what she was saying did make sense

“Whatever, this friendship is over” Jade answered

“It was over the day you declared me a whore” Hayden spat and turned her attention to a sad looking Peyton “And you let her do that and didn’t say anything”

She walked towards the door and walked out .Jade liked Russell?

“Hayden the lawyer is here to see you honey” Hailey informed her helping her up two steps

The sound of a crisp page being turned echoed in her ears, the clock sounded louder and her heart beat felt like it was slowing down.

She thought about where she was going to live or who with, she didn’t want to live in an orphanage

“First off I am sorry for your loss” the chubby man started and scratched his beard “We are here to discuss the will of Adrianna Abby Gonzales

Her parents looked like they had caught a wink of sleep, obviously Hayden their daughter just died along with their first grandchild.

“Okay it says here that Adrianna-”she heard the man’s voice fading away and she went into her own world, It’s funny how one minute you’re happy and the next everything is taken away from you in an instance.

Her vision started getting blurry and her body started to feel weak and numb, she shut her eyes tightly

“May I be excused she asked” and they all looked at her

“Are you okay sweetie?” Hailey asked stepping closer

“Y-yeah I just need a minute” she answered her voice breaking slightly

“You need you crutches” she worriedly told her

“No, I-I just need air right now” she smiled softly and started limping ignore the sharp pain she was feeling

As soon as Hayden walked to the big oak tree she slowly slid down, letting a few tears escape

She breathed out hoping to calm her nerves

“Aren’t you supposed to stay off your feet as much as you can?”

She heard a deep voice ask and turned her head finding Mike standing next to her, the smile on his face completely wiped off his face when he noticed the tears in her eyes.

“Hey” he said sitting down, he reminded her of Ryan in so many ways sometimes it was scary.

“What did I do Mike?” she asked “It’s my fault” she cried

“Hey, no its not” he told her and cupped her cheeks in his large hands “Get that thought out of your pretty little head alright”

She let out a sniffle and a tear rolled down her cheek

“It was nothing but bad timing” he continued to speak, hugging her tightly

“Hey” Elliot smiled softly and joined them on the green grass

“Hi” Hayden softly answered “I’m sorry about what happened to you” she apologised

“It’s not your fault, I saw red and went in for my best friend’s girlfriend” he smirked when a red colour tinted her cheeks


“He’s not my boyfriend, what were you doing there anyway” she asked him, changing the topic quickly and he hesitated sharing a glance with Mike

“I-was visiting someone in your neighbourhood and saw a dodgy car parked in front of your house and then I heard screams and ran in” he explained

She nodded her head and looked at the large field in front of her

“Where’s Russell” she asked licking her lips which were salty from her tears

“He was making a few calls” Mike answered to quickly for her liking

She nodded her head and stood up startling them both

“Whoa” Elliot said loudly catching a few people’s attention, startling her and he lifted her

“Elliot, what are you doing? I can walk on my own” she hissed

“Are you crazy, one more hair harmed on this pretty little head of yours and Russell kills us both” he explained looking at Mike who was smirking at them both

“This is ridiculous, put me down now” she wined, her pout being completely ignored

Elliot handed her to Mike...more like tossed her like a sack of potatoes

She let out a shriek and pulled her dress down

They did that for a good two minutes until she landed into someone else’s arms and from their smell she could tell it was Russell.

She looked up and his grey gaze was piercing her own, his lips in a straight line, one eyebrow raised.

He didn’t say anything, his jaw tightly clenched, he looked at Mike and Elliot with a stern look that clarified it was not over.

He turned and started walking towards the house

“Russell, I can walk on my own” she huffed, squirming in his arms. When he didn’t say anything she stopped her movement and let him carry her

“You were crying” he spoke looking ahead.

“It’s nothing”

“It’s not nothing” he answered, his gaze still focused ahead

He stopped at an old rusty bench and sat down with her on his laps

She had a lot to ask him but didn’t know how to begin; he was intimidating her even though he wasn’t speaking. He looked so handsome...so forbidden yet intriguing ;the sun shining in his black hair that looked longer ,now actually touching his broad shoulders, his lips were slightly parted and from the crease on his forehead she could tell he was deep in thought.

“I can hear you think Hayden” he spoke trying to suppress his smirk

“Russell” she called his name and he turned his attention to her “That night” she swallowed hard, trying to just say everything at once “If Elliot passed out, I passed out and Adrianna died, who came in for me?”

“I did” he answered getting to the point to end this conversation quicker because that was the second worst night for him, seeing her lying on the floor in blood and her face messed up was his worst nightmare, her body was limp when he found her with Adrianna laying beside her and that sick bastard trying to undress her

“Is that man still alive?” she asked, fear laced in her voice


“Where is he?” she asked him

“Dead, I killed him” he answered nonchalantly, he remembered beating him harshly and shooting him. For some reason through all the commotion the world was blocked out of his head, he saw his father and lost all the control he had

It took Chad and a few men to pull him off but the fucker still died because he shot him

There was another silence as he waited for her to process it all; Hayden knew she was done with the conversation because she wasn’t ready to open a box of memories.

“You worry me Russell” she honestly spoke

“I can take care of myself” he answered

“But what if by chance you get caught and you’re put in prison?” she asked really thinking about it

“Would you miss me?” he asked her and she suddenly didn’t like where she had driven the conversation


“I would miss a short woman with red hair and green eyes”

“You think I’m a woman Scott” she asked using his last name

He looked at her, a lazy grin taking over his face

“You are defiantly a woman” she looked away not able to take the heat. Why did he insist on making her shy?

She turned her upper body slightly and her small hands reached up to his jaw and she leaned in, kissing his lips softly

“I love you so much it’s starting to fucking hurt Russell Scott” she softly spoke making sure his gaze was on her and her only. She knew he wouldn’t say it back and she wasn’t going to push him

He was shocked at how she laid it out and just watched her struggle to form her next sentence, her cheeks turning a beautiful shade of pink

She liked it when he called her baby but decided to keep that to herself and save herself the embarrassment.

“We should get back inside” he stood up and a light squeal left her lips and she adjusted her dress.

A few minutes later they were done with her will and Hayden found out that Adrianna and Ryan had an account for her which had some money to pay for college. Hailey and Dan offered to pay for her current tuition, give her an allowance every month end and requested visits whenever they pleased which wasn’t even a question because Hayden loved these people like her own parents.

As for the living arrangements Russell refused to let her move to a different country and Annabelle said she wanted her so she would be staying with her until she clocked 18.

It would be awkward because she was always on Hayden’s case and she wasn’t Adrianna but she wasn’t declining any places to stay and to be honest she didn’t want to move away from Sam and Russell.


“Hey” Annabelle sat next to her “So when do you want to get your stuff from the your old place?” she asked her

Annabelle knew what responsibility it was but she loved Hayden and knew Adrianna would want that to happen.

“I was meaning to ask you something” Hayden started playing with her fingers which she noticed was a habit of hers “Can I stay over at Sam’s tonight?” Hayden could tell from the look on Annabelle’s face she was contemplating on saying no.

“Your leg, I don’t really think-”

“Please? I just need to get my mind of certain things”

Annabelle wanted to start her responsibilities early but didn’t want to push her away and feel like she can’t talk to her about anything.

“Okay, I’ll pi-”

“She can drop me off” Hayden answered quickly and Annabelle gave her a questioning look

“Okay” she answered slowly “Do you need clothes?”

“I packed them just in case” she smiled and opened the car door pulling her overnight bag out while hoping on one foot

“Okay, so I’ll see you later” Annabelle smiled “Call me and I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Hayden nodded her head and hugged her. She stood by the car with her bag next to her and her crutches until she drove off.

She already said goodbye to Hailey and Dan a while ago, she bent to pick her bag, dropping one of her crutches in the process.

“Here” she heard a soft voice speak and she turned to find Peyton standing close

“Thanks” she mumbled and started to hobble away from her

“Hayden wait, I’m sorry about Jade. I had no idea she felt that way” she apologised “I’m sorry I just sat there while she embarrassed you, we can’t throw away  10 years of friendship over that” she sobbed

“Peyton I just need space from everyone right now” she truthfully answered and continued to hobble to the bench she was seated on with Russell earlier.



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