This is Crazy, but I'm in the Bayverse!

This is Crazy: Book 1. I have seen all three movies, Transformers movies. A Transformer, in the fandom of Transfans, means gigantic alien machines that can scan vehicles and become them, hence, becoming Robots in Disguise. They are not the powerboxes that you see on the poles. They have sparks, which generate their personality and life being extremely vital to living itself. And then there's the Allspark, the cube. I have seen the first movie several times directed by Micheal Bay, the worst director ever. Why? I'll get to that, as soon as this Dark of The Moon is about to end.


41. There and back again

The ship finally returned for Megatron and RobustShell; who happened to be absolutely drunk. It's very clear they are really intoxicated without looking into their optics. Megatron and Robustshell are unable to walk right. Their armor was decorated in graffiti and stained in some high grade energon also being a form of Vodka in Cybertronian culture.  The two stumbled into the ship landing on top of each other as they look physically older.

   "Off to nevahland!" Robustshell raises a energon bottle that has the face of a imaginary character. "BBlluueeee!"

   RobustShell hiccups.

  "Do I knuuww youu?" RobustShell said, in a drunken voice."'Nice perpella--Sexy!"

   Megatron's cloak has some stains more than his armor.

   "Can I have some chairs?" Megatron asks, sounding so drunk he couldn't have made a correct choice many hours ago. He hiccupss ever so bluntly. "Nooo....I like sssome gurnella bars!"

      StoorageBait covers his mouth,trying to stifle a laugh.

    Starscream and the others were startled at this.

      "H-...Ho...How..How..." Starscream is trying to speak his mind. However, he is left speechless by the age-gap between RobustShell and Megatron. His optics glare at the crowd. Almost as if they were daggers instead of robotical-sensory mechanical gadgets that helped in sight.RobustShell and Megatron are making some unusual comments

   "I-I-i-I want some honeeeey!" RobustShell said, waving her bottle. Her optics are different, her voice sounds more matured, and her armor appears to have changed to being part of some big vehicle. To be more specific it's a purple and light gray Furai. "I need chocolate---OOOH Megatraawwwn there's no gurnella bars on baoard!" 

     RobustShellwaves her small servo in the air. "What arrrr gurnella buurss?"

     "Energon bars of chocolatee!" Megatron drabbles, his optics sparkling almost like gems sized into hideious metal.

     "AHHH!" A Decepicon shrieks. "MEGATRON IS DRUNK!"

     A cybertronian rat darts  underneath Megatron mamking him a little wibbly-wobbly.

    "Forestt bulll!" Megatron is slurred in his words. "Off too tea weapon room, everieewon!"

   The Decepticons could not believe their audios in what he is saying, but  They decided to go alone what he is orderiing them. Megatron grabs RobustShell (who is hicupping) around her waist, and lead them to the weapons room that had teleportation currently on. Megatron's heidious optics can tell a far more idea sprawing in his processor.

   "Weree aree wee going?" RobustShell's voice is really slurred.

  "Too steal tea staff of almegordion, honey." Megatron enters the room then put in the cordinates. He has been drunk for a really long time. No telling what he can do in a few days without high grade energon or vodka. 

   Starscream's jaw drops as he heard Megatron say 'Honey' towards RobustShell.

   "If anniewon  gets en our why...they must bee anniliated!

  In a flash  the entire group is gone.

   Lets fastforward two days and four megacycles later.

  "I am so dirty!" Deframe immeatedly complains, as he is the first to appear. There is green junk all over his armor and dark dirt see on his heels. He walks out the door shouting; "This is so wrong covered in SEAWEED!"


   The group is teleported back into the weaponary room. Megatron held the staff that seems a bit damaged at the sides and it's once promient top. A few mechs among the group have dents in their armor. RobustShell has some twigs poking from her helmet. Megatron's foot has some seaweed wrapped around it.

   "...I'm tiired."

    They fell flat on the floor and began a short snooze.

     "Whoever's responsible for sending them to Party; you better stay." The Seeker grumbles, cracking his long and sharp digits that are feared by many small organics in the galaxy.  Those claws are not only useful to do some science, but pin down a target and dissect the target to death. His optics burn to a darker tone of red.   "And help me get these two up!"

  Stooragebait and Flipstick, including WardSprint are the only Decepticons standing after the crowd dispersed.

     ~                                   ~                                               ~                                   ~

RobustShell and Megatron were recovering from their awfully long 'drunk' vacation, well that's how it had been spent for the majority of it--the first half got them back together and making out after being left without a sane Decepticon--that really could be years. Technically years in terms of cybertronian and human, but that problem comes from the ship going into light speed by accident.

   Because, Starscream had made a specific order (As second in command) to get back their leader and his 'girlfriend' after discovering by gossip they were leadless....For about three solar cycles. Not one Decepticon noticed the absence of Megatron and RobustShell. Party planet has a faster time cycle than any other planet. Megatron never knew time had flew ridiculously fast. It seemed the planet is absurdly prosper to have parties at night and be so sober in day.

      "I want merrijuania!" Robustshell declares, waving the foot of a chair that is bent and all broken enough it's a spear. Her drink is the universal red with it being designed simialr to a solo-cup that had been evovled into a big beer bottle over the decades. Her speech is pretty much slurred at best.

      "No." Starscream and the other mechs brought in a large tube. Starscream's optic size has tripled twice what it is supposed to be.  "We don't have that....Merryness."

        "I am 22 years  olddd!" Robustshell repeats, putting on a lamp decoration over her helmet. She flaps her arms like a baby falcon attempting to fly at a really young age. When not in the right physical-bearing qualities such as feathers, wings, or jetpacks. "I'mma burdd!"

     Megatron cackles at  Robustshell,who stumbles akwardly on the floor.

    "I remember you were at least 15..." Megatron said, in a drunken-joking kind of voice. "Do I look pretty?"

       Robustshell nods.

   "You two act like children," Starscream acknowledges, as Scout and WardSprint get out a large can of oil. "You've been high for too long." He shook his helmet. "Scout. You should never had gotten them on the Party Planet,because Megatron strictly does not ever want himself drunk. Not what like what happened last--"

    Megatron and Robustshell had a quick-one-of-the-moment glance.

   "Shiinnyy time!" Robusthshell rubs her servos other. The big object somehow changes from clear to a murky-oil type of liquid. Not the kind that spurt ts out dinosaur remains every few decades or years. It's so much different. In the presence of drunk robots, just about anything can happen.  "Oh no, we caaan duuee better than zhat."

   Megatron and RobustShell tied up Starscream, then actually made Starscream perhaps more dirty using bad stench oil.

    "...Did...they...are they?" Scout stutters, unable to believe his optics, as some objects were tossed from the cleaning.

     "They are giving Starscream a bath!"  WardSprint said it, tapping her chin plating. "That will be quite a story."

      Megatron and RobustShell take a foot back to admire what they had finished together.

   "Mppphh!" Starscream tries to move in the binding bow and thick string  that had been done ever so good in the stage of drunk. His mouth is covered by some kind of taperstry. "Mpphh--get-me--out--...GET--MEURR OUT of here!"

     Robustshell and Megatron laugh at him.

  "No no no tinker bell." Robustshell smudgely tells the seeker, lightly touching her chest plating. Her optic catches sight of some unseen force taking a few feet back.  Even though this femme is drunk that doesn't mean fear can be genuine.  "W-w-w-w-what...I just saw a pussy cat. It looked so ugly and feline.  It has the face of a connected network ape. whw-w-what was-w-ahat-"

   Megatron takes  RobustShell's servos.

   "Lettttts  gouuuu ttttto thhhhhhe armour room." Megatron said,  as a blush forms on Robustshell's faceplate. His words are actually drawn out and seem to make him mistakenly sound like a British Decepticon when in reality he is not. Becoming drunk is not one of Megatrons' best perks as a leader.

   RobustShell hiccups.

    "Loovee messing up armor..." RobustShell leans to the edge of a medical berth. "beezz praank evar! And zhen, zhe  furnizure room!"

  WardSprint and Scout get out their way, sharing odd glances to each other.

 Scout caught Megatron and RobustShell sharing a kiss, when they were supposedly out of earshot. Ohhh. oohhhhhh. They are in love. He finally comes to terms between their relationship. Why did the fallen make me follow Megatron again?...

  Scout is tapped on his shoulder.

 "Hii-YAH!" Scout karate kicks whoever just tapped his shoulder.

 "Mateeee!" Canocopy whines,holding up his left knee. His optics are more like daggers at the much shorter Decepticon, "That hurt!"

 Scout covered Canocopy's moutth.

 "Shhh." Scout said, putting his index digit to his lips "They are making out."

  Canocopy takes Scout's hand off.

 "Why does that matter?" Canocopy whispes in a harsh voice. "I always knew those rumors werre true."

   PlayerSwitch  and Deframe were about to walk by chatting about something.

   Canocopy and Scout stand in their way.

 "They are making out," Canocopy said. "Give them some privacy."

   Deframe's jaw went slack.

  "sSince when do Decepticons give a piece of slag about privacy?" Deframe asks, in a low voic,.

   "Since Megatron got drunk with his girlfriend." Scout adds.

   PlayerSwitch rubs his jaw plating.

  "You must be fooling us." PlayerSwitch said, leanning forward. "How can you be so sure.."

 Scout points to the corner.

 "See for yourself, Player and neat freak." Scout calls them by their nicknames.

  PlayerSwitch and Deframe look to see Megtron and RobustShell locked in an optic gaze.

"Good unicron," Deframe shook his helmet as he whispers. "Our leader's fallen for a rookie."


      8 Megacycles later....

   Megatron's optics power on. helmet hurts. He stood up feeling pain in his knee's and elbows. Wasn't he just on The Party Planet? Megatron looks down to see a curled up RobustShell visibily  older than he saw her.  Whaaaat? She cannot be older than that. He rubs his optics and saw his cloak is on something bumpy. This is...odd..Starscream must have picked us up...She cannot have aged so far.

    He takes the cloak off the armor to see splatters and splattters that were different shades of gray in his view. 

    "..What did we do?" He then remembers what RobustShell claimed to have seen ever so vaugely. Description of apes in camouflage and in white, that can only be one thing. He shook his head. Humans.  But it's not possible. We haven't been around humans since leaving earth. "No...It's merely nothing. Has no involvement in...this mess of paint."

     He picks up the sleeping femme.

    "....Never actually said this before..,." The leader muses, walking through the dark hallway. Robustshell stirs in her recharge otherwise known as sleep. He didn't need to find a speech. Megatron only has four words to say. Words that she may not ever hear from him in the morning when everyone is awake. "Her personality is beautiful."


        The door to Robustshell's room slides up.

  Carefully, Megatron goes through the quite messy room with a lamplight at the corner. Whatever she had discarded over time has become a great mess.A great hint that RobustShell could be a lazy type of femme.  A mess that is terrible to walk through. Didn't RobustShell claim to have organized her room?... Megatron pushes himself forward next to the berth.

          He puts RobustShell on the berth.

      "Oh."  Megatron's right optic notices  the mess is in rows. Almost in categories to their importance  "She must have been organizing." Megatron laughs(Not loud) at the unfinished room. He learned a little more about her just by the junk directly in rows. It should be noted the disadvantage to being a gigantic robot is the feet.

     Feet that can crush anything.

    He  gets out the room--making a lot of noise--and  RobustShell stirred in her sleep.

   Megatron takes a moment to pause at her sleeping state. He hadn't seen her sleep like this in quite some time. Its almost like...I can't put my digit on it. Naturally it's expected for a bad guy  who leads a dangerous faction to expect the unexpected. He is not wearing his cloak. But his cybertronian-face easily reveals Megatron feels something is wrong. It just...feels....Something feels off.

      Other than that, Megatron actually cares for this femme. As so many Decepticons actually suspect and support this idea like a ship.

     "Who is she?" Scout's voice startles the leader.

      Megatron shifts right, and turns his direction towards the shorter mech.

     "Rouw--RobustShell." Megatron promptly said, looking at him strangely as he saw two of Scout. "I must be mistaken, Is there two of you?...."

        Scout folds his arms.

      "I mean it, Megatron." Scout is using all his courage to say this directly to a leader. The one who can just get rid of him just by a snap or a hidden task force. He's sneaky as some Autobots who hate Megatron can say. "Who. is. she?" He shook his head. "No. There's only one of me."

    Megatron grimaces, feeling tired.

     "Secrets are what keeps us safe." He walks past Scout.  He takes a pause in his tracks, looking over his shoulder towards Scout. "You shouldn't be asking...."

    "Megatron," Scout clears his throat, knowing this might as well anger Megatron. "I was there when you did the....emotional bonding with her. The Falllen had me-- "

    Megatron growls, his glare seemingly became a intimidating force rather than a threatening demeanor.

    "Just forget it." Megatron orders him, waving his large servo. "Better yet, delete it from your memory bank. Decepticons are not fit if they are paranoid all the time. Nor should your twin."

     "...I...don't have... a twin." Scout protests, clearly un-aware that Megatron is drunk.

    Scout assumed he had sobered up.

    Megatron walks away, easily muttering something to himself. He is feeling albeit tired and hurt at his joints. Megatron does remember that some of the crewmembers had tricked him and RobusttShell out the ship. The last thing he did remember is having a strange lochness-like cybertronian do couple therapy with him and RobustShell.  I need recharge,Megatron thought as he dismisses the memory of an old figure in his past.

     That figure,who he ignored on a strange day during the great war, is barely one to call 'a Decepticon'.


    A little bit of a rewind accours going back to the planet that's mostly one seemingly odd and unbelieveable  The Inhabitants are cybertronian with marine like characteristics. The scene changes into a big room fit for a king. A cybertronian-fish-like king was showing off his precious weapons to some femmes on a throne. A starfish Cybertronian rushed into the room throwing open the doors.

 "SIR!" The starfish yelled. "We have a red alert!"

 The king laughed.

 "What is it this time?"  The king asked, sounding cool and easy-going. He showed his staff to the shortest femme who bore resemblence to a leopard seel.  His chest armor has the head of dolphin. The tail (part of the dolphin)s is attached to his back curling upwards like a treebranch serving shade. The  femme's whiskers brushed against the  silver staff.

  The starfish gulps.

 "" The Starfish said, panting for breath. "And so is the femme."

 The femme's around the king nearly froze. They all knew what that name meant. They knew it too well. The Great War on Cybertron had been a point where Decepticon brutality became more harsh, expecially their treatment. It also gave rise to  Autobot and Decepticon reputation.Decepticons are perhaps feared.

The king was surprised.

   "The femme?" The King repeats, his optics change from a light purple to a blazing orange. "You are not making sense, my lad!"

    The Starfish gulped.

   "I am afraid this day may not make sense."  The Starfish said, looking up from the floor.

   Charging in came Megatron and the small group of Decepticon.The smell of high grade energon is really obivous coming from Megatron and RobustShell. The femme's around The King had gasped at RobustShell's odd  body model. A few had big optics at PlayerSwitch's  attractable waist.

    "I'm not a junglegym."  RobustShell leaned to the side of Megatron's large servo. Her voice easily indicated that RobustShell was still a bit drunk. But she had a lot of time to sober up

   ' are drunk!' The King points out to Megatron. "You ladies, stand back before he makes a fool of himself."

 Megatron's mouth became a smile.

 "What about it?" Megatron said, in a daring voice. "Scared of a little drunk?"

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