Can't Keep It In

The definition of love is whatever you make it to be. It's unwritten, it's a blank piece of paper. You have to fill it out yourself in order to truly share the meaning.

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1. Chapter One.

   The low tune of Liam's voice was finding itself to my ears, making me smile with such passion. The passion that I've had bottled up for about two years now. You might think that it's a bit odd for me to be thinking of Liam as if I loved him. But the strangest thing just clicked inside my mind, and one day, one very important day, I started to love Liam James Payne.

 

   I walked into his bedroom, and my eyes lied upon the most peaceful scene ever. Liam was lying on the ground, on the balcony. The sun peaked from the mountains in the background, and the rays hit Liam's tan skin. His chocolate brown eyes shimmered in the kind of way that would make even the most saddened human beam with pure delight. His arms laid above his head, lazily. And his legs were loosely crossed.

 

   But the most alluring thing of all, was the song he was singing. It was my song. The song that I wrote. And he happened to find it in my journal. The journal that had all my secrets. Everything. Even my little doodles, and entries about him, all my thoughts...

 

   "Sing with me,

    because I am close to the edge.

    Love me,

    because I can't keep it in..."

 

    I slowly tip-toed closer to him, hoping he wouldn't hear me. I sat on his bed, watching him. He didn't know I was listening to him, so he kept going on. I curled up with a pillow, and I fluttered my eyes closed to his raspy tone. It made my heart melt with every word passing by his lips. It even made me swoon over him even more than I already was.

 

    After a awhile the singing had to come to an end once Liam glanced over and saw me. He widened his eyes and quickly sat up, and parted his lips to try and explain to me what I just witnessed.

 

    "I- Uh.. Um." Liam stuttered in alarm.

 

    "You sang my song better than I did." I grin.

 

     He stood up, and walked so he was standing in front of me. Then Liam kneeled, and all of a sudden, I was engulfed in one of his warm hugs. We both didn't say anything for awhile, but we enjoyed the disconcerting quietness. And it gave me a lot of time to think about how much I wished for a moment in life were he'd know that I loved him, and he'd know all the words to describe my admiration for him. Now he does. It was all on paper, and he read it. That also makes me so nervous. How is a straight man going to react to one of his best friends loving him as if he were a lover?

 

     By my account, Liam treats me like a brother. A brother, a person who is like your best pal, the go-to guy, the closely related friend... but not someone you can hug, kiss, cuddle, or marry. Yes, I said marry. And now that I think about it, if he asked me in the future if I would marry him, I'd say yes till he would tell me to stop saying yes.

 

     Now I'm just rambling to get my mind of the fact that Liam has been hugging me for a minute straight now. I can feel the blood rising to me cheeks, and my skin turning a bright pink. My palms are sweaty... And I sure do have that feeling in the pit of my stomach. That's how I know that I love him.

 

     "Niall," And the air paused. The sound filled the room. His voice. "I've been thinking about you for the longest time now. And how close we've been... And I just feel like there is something. Just a spark, a spark that with turn into a ball of flames..."

 

     He kept pausing, like as if he'd say something and he couldn't take it back.

 

     Then Liam pulled back and looked at me with sorrow filled eyes. Oh no. No...

 

     "I'm sorry-" He stood up. Liam just stood up and walked out of his own room, leaving me there to have my smile drop into a deeply distressed frown.

 

     

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