I woke up to the sound of a loud sneeze and gran's screechy voice.
"Katarina Lucinda Figg come down here this instant"
I sat up groggily rubbing the sleep from my eyes. "Coming" I said in the middle of a yawn (not sure whether she actually heard me never mind that though she's used to having a slow granddaughter with a tremendous need to sleep). Many might wonder why I did not rush down the stairs to answer gran's accusations but I can assure you that rushing down was my intention but being the sleepy one I am I merely failed in the matter of execution.
Anyroad, once downstairs all remaining thoughts of sleep were blown away by gran's un-choreographed dance of anger. In my hurry to answer Harry's letter the day before I had apparently forgotten to give Snowy his worm-shot. When one forgets this, it causes him to sneeze green goo all over the place – green goo that I must now clean up.
*What I am about to say may or may not trick a lot of you into thinking that you understand Snowy's hatred for me but you don't - to be clear that cat put it on himself*
It was back in September just before Harry got his letter I was hanging out in the basement with Mr. Paws when Mundungus Fletcher arrived - 7 point describtion of the so-called Mundungus Fletcher:
1. shady con man with low self-hygiene
2. deals in magical artefacts
3. for some unknown reason a member of the Order of the Phoenix
4. has sometimes watched over Harry when gran and I had business elsewhere. (Yes, I myself, a baby squib, help watch over “The Boy Who Lived” and if trouble is in sight I will blow in Dumbledore’s magic whistle thus help will come)
5. I don't, have and will never like Mundungus Fletcher
6. he's unkempt and not very polite plus he always addresses me as if I am a stupid little child (I may be a stupid little child but only I have the right to say so).
7. he seems to enjoy a good cup of coffee
Anyhow... I bounced up the stairs with Mundungus at my heels and alerted gran of his arrival. Gran looked him up and down with disapproval before offering him a good cup of coffee. That’s when the bad stuff happened. I was rummaging through Mundungus’ suitcase and was currently holding a round red ball when Snowy chose that this was the moment to attack my face. I screamed and dropped the ball causing it to explode (it wasn’t a ball after all. It was a black-market Stink Pellet – twice the power). Mundungus realizing the danger quickly threw a more or less successful Bubble-Head Charm on every living person in the room… when I call it a “more or less successful charm” it is because it managed to swallow everyone except Snowy. That my friends is the reason why I must now give Stinkitus worm-shots to a very displeased half-Kneazle cat, called Snowy. Mundungus sometime afterwards managed to clear up the air and then continued on with his business after being chased around the house by an angry old woman with a broom.
Zooming into the present here I stand in green goo to my ankles. One of the disadvantages of being a squib is that you cannot simply wave you wand and clean it all up like that, you have to actually use soab and a mob and wash it away. It is both boring and timeconsuming.