As I lay in bed, all I can feel is numb. This whole week, all I've done was lay in my bed, listen to sad music, cry, and sleep. Since Sunday, I can feel my heart break into smaller and smaller pieces each day. All I do is lay in my bed and stare up at the ceiling. I haven't eaten, I only get up if I have to go to the bathroom and even when I do that, I don't leave my bedroom since I have one in my room. Sometimes, I'll cry really hard and I'll end up barfing in there too.
Mom and dad have checked up on me frequently but when they do, I don't talk at all. Becky returned to her college and her life but I decided to call her and tell her what happened. She offered on coming back and helping me but I said that she couldn't. She had to continue her college education.
This week, I have missed all school days. I....I just can't bring myself up to go in front of them. When Abby comes home, she tries to talk to me but I don't listen. I pretend to sleep or if she knows I'm up, I blast my music and tune her out. Sometimes, I'll hear her come home and I hear the boys and Emily with her. When that happens, I blast music and try falling asleep while my heart breaks more and more.
When I sleep.....it's after I cry. During the nights, I either cry myself to sleep or stay up and think about everything. If I don't cry, I don't go to sleep. When I do sleep, I have nightmares. I have nightmares about the boys and Liam and how they have a better life without me. I dream about the girls and how they like it better without me. Just......everyone is happier without me.
I shake the thoughts out of my head and get up to go to the bathroom. I decide to actually get out of my room for a moment and use the bathroom down the hall. When I get in there, I do my business and then I wash my hands. I look up in the mirror and see a broken girl. I have really red puffy eyes and my skin looks as white as a ghost. My hair is a mess and I look like I haven't showered in weeks. I think "Why? Why did this have to happen to me?"
I look in the mirror for a little longer but then shake my head and decide to grab a water bottle. I walk out of the bathroom and walk towards the kitchen. Suddenly, I hear voices but I'm too late as I've already walked into the kitchen. I look at everyone except the one sitting at my kitchen table. I look down at the floor and quickly grab a water bottle. As soon as I grab it, I walk back to my room ignoring Abby and Emily who are calling my name. I get into my room and as soon as I close the door, I slide down and cry as my heart breaks into more pieces.
As we get to Abby's house, I start thinking about the past week. If I wasn't at school, I was at home and in my room just laying there. Even at school, I wouldn't pay attention and I didn't do any homework. All I could think about, was Molly. Everyday, I hoped that Molly would come to school but she never did.
All of us have been pretty down this week. Abby and Emily always came to the hotel sad. All of us had some kind of emotion towards this. When we would all hang out, Abby and Emily kept talking about how Molly was right and they should've told her. Then at least she would have someone to talk to.
One day, I was so upset that I actually blew up at everyone. We all started fighting but luckily, we all noticed what was happening and we stopped.
Today after school, we all headed to Abby's house and now, I am sitting at her kitchen table. All of them are talking but suddenly, we hear someone enter the kitchen. I look towards the direction and it's......Molly. I notice how pale and how thinner she's gotten. Her face is red and you can tell she's been crying. All of us look at her and for a second, she looks at everyone.....except me.
Suddenly, she puts her head down and quickly walks and grabs a water bottle. Once she does, she walks back to her room while Abby and Emily try calling her name. We hear her door close and all of us sigh.
I start thinking and I say "I think someone should talk to her." I look up and everyone is looking at me. I look at Abby and she nods her head and says "Yeah. This week I've tried talking to her but she never answered me. I talked to my mom and she said that she hasn't talked to anyone. All she's done was lay in her room. She hasn't eaten or done anything. That's why she looked thinner when she came in here."
As Abby says that, my heart breaks. I take a breath and say "But who's gonna talk to her? She won't want to talk to me."
Emily speaks up and says "Yeah. And she won't want to talk to me or Abby either. I don't think she'd want to talk to you Zayn either cause you're her best friend in the group and you didn't tell her." I look at Zayn and he sadly nods his head.
Suddenly, Louis speaks up and says "I could talk to her. I mean, I've gone through the same thing and Molly knows she can talk to me. And I don't think she's gonna get too mad at me."
I look at the rest of the group and they all nod their heads. Abby says "Liam, what do you think?"
I sigh and say "Only because it will get Molly talking. I just.....I want her to feel better."
Louis nods his head and he walks away to Molly's room.
When I get to Molly's door, I hear her crying. I slightly knock on the door but she doesn't answer. I slightly open the door and see her laying on her bed with ear buds in and she's crying. I open the door and enter. Once I close the door, I walk over to her and she doesn't look up.
As she continues to cry, I pick her up bridal style and sit cross legged on her bed then set her on my lap. I wrap my arms around her and she cries into my shoulder. She takes out her earbuds and as she cries, she manages to say "Why? W-why did he have to cheat on me-e?"
Molly continues to cry and she just sobs. After about 10-15 minutes, it sounds like she has stopped crying. I take two fingers under her chin and make her look up at me. When I look into her eyes, I notice how broken she is. I say "Molly......" I pause and think about what I should say. I continue and say "I'm not defending Liam, but when it happened...he was drunk. Now I'm not saying that just because he was drunk means that he get away with it but I'm saying that it's kind of hard to control yourself when you're drunk. When me, Harry, and Niall left the club, he only had a couple of drinks and he wanted to stay with Zayn just so then Zayn wasn't alone. Well, when Liam told us the story, he said that after he met up with Zayn, he did not remember anything. When he woke up the next morning and saw the girl lying next to him, he knew that he had made the biggest mistake of his life. After you left, he cried for a good hour. Him, Abby, and Emily were crying because they lost you. Me, Harry, Niall and Zayn also had some tears in our eyes because we were scared that we had lost you as an amazing friend. This past week, all of us had been pretty down but Liam....all he did was lay in his room. When we got home from school, he went right to his room. In school, he didn't pay attention, he didn't do the homework, he was there but yet he wasn't. And then today when he...actually, when all of us saw you, our hearts broke. Abby told us that your mom said you haven't eaten or didn't drink anything all week. Thats why you have gotten so much thinner." I pause and poke at Molly's tummy.
She slightly smiles and I smile too. Suddenly, her smile disappears and she says "Well like I have tried eating and stuff but it just comes right back up. Sometimes when I cry too, I'll end up barfing."
I sigh and say "Molly....that isn't heathy. You need to get up and actually eat something. You need to get out of bed and come hang with us."
Molly looks down and says "To be honest, I have missed hanging out with you guys. It's just that when you guys didn't tell me....it really hurt. I...I thought I could trust you guys."
I wrap my arms around her tighter and say "You can trust us Molly. We all wanted to tell you but we just thought that Liam had to be honest and tell you."
She sighs and says "I....I just don't know what to do." She trails off and plays with her fingers.
I say "Well, what do you wanna do? Do you wanna lay in bed forever and be alone or do you wanna forgive us and gave fun times like we've always talked about?"
Molly sighs and says "Well I wanna forgive you guys I just don't know about Liam."
"Well," I pause and take a breath. I continue and say "Do you still want to be with him? Do you still love him?"
Molly looks at me slightly wide eyed and says "How do you know I love him?"
I smile and look at her. I say "Molly, please. Everyone can tell you love him. The question is, do you know?"
She looks down at her lap for a minute and thinks. Suddenly, she looks up at me with a smile and says "I do. I love him."
I smile and put my lips to her ear. I whisper "Then why don't you go tell him?" When I pull back, I see a giant smile on her face.
She nods her head and then quickly gets off of me and runs to the kitchen with me behind her. Once we get to the kitchen, Molly looks at Liam then at me. Liam stands up and says "Molly? What is going on?"
Molly walks up to Liam and puts a finger to his lips. She puts a hand behind his neck and slowly pulls him down to her. Once he's close enough, she smiles and says "I love you." then smashes her lips onto his.
I look at Liam and he is smiling as he is finally kissing his girl again. They are suddenly broken apart as we all hear the door swing open and Abby comes running through.
As she catches her breath, Molly asks "Abby, what happened?"
Once she is able to breath, she looks at us and says "Guys.....Emily's been kidnapped."