10. Insanity - QueenOfAwesome
First of all, I LOVE your cover!!
So, anyway. This story is FULL of suspense, and unanswered questions! The whole thing is a mystery, with occasional hints of humour. The atmosphere is really tense, and you maintain it really well.
The beginning of the story is quite clever - The flashback already making you question what's going on.
You describe the people very well, and show their personalities by the things they say and do, instead of stating; Lira is stubborn and confused, etc etc.
You use lots of different adjectives to describe the landscapes, but still manage to keep it interesting.
Your chapter endings are good, and they vary; sometimes funny, sometimes confusing and occasional cliffhangers.
Overall, you have a really nice writing style, which works with the style your writing - the short sentences and longer ones work really well - Tense, half sentences and then longer ones for realisations or what's actually happened.
There are only a few improvements:
Though the unanswered questions and mysteries are really effective, there are a LOT of them, and so far in the story there have been no answers. I don't know, you may have lots coming up in the next chapter, but if you keep on making new ones with no old answers, you run the risk of letting people forget the important things, which could make it REALLY confusing to read.
Also, it seems as if you had the original plot of her being in the insanity ward because she was a danger to society, and then threw her into the future. To make this seem a little less of a jump, you could add some dates into it - like saying 'I went into it at 2014' and then something like '2014? This is ????' - to make the jump a little less strange (Unless that was your intention).
Overall this is a REALLY good book, and it's something that would be really good as a movie!!