1. That night.
All I remember was I heard the sirens outside. I got up from the couch and looked through the blinds to see what was going on. There were police cars and ambulances. Parked right in front of Jay's house. I ran outside and over to the cars and tried to get through to see what was going on.
No one would let me by.
"It's Cristina!" Mrs.Anderson (Jay's mother) screamed pointing at me crying.
She held my hand and led me into the house. Her eyes were blood shot red. She walked into the room. Everything seemed out of place. Books everywhere, papers flying, clothes everywhere. She handed me a paper. I looked at her confused still wondering what was going on. I could barely think straight. The sirens were too loud. And i was shaking. I looked at the paper. It said:
I'm sorry to have to put you all through this. But I couldn't take it anymore. It was all too much. The world will be much better without me. Don't worry. And Cristina, I love you so much. You were my one and only true love. I hope you never forget me. I'm sorry for this my love. And mother and father, I love you guys. But I couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry.
Suddenly my knees went numb. I don't remember if I fell or not. Or what happened after that. All I remember is the next morning.
i woke up with my mom in the same bed. I was in jeans and a shirt. I stood up and walked up to a mirror. All the makeup was smeared. I had bloodshot eyes. I looked tired.
I was shaky. I could barely walk to the kitchen. My hair was everywhere. And I was barefoot. I remember trying to get a bowl of cearl but I ended up crying on my Cheerios before I even poured the milk. I wasn't even hungry. I just sat on the floor in the middle of the kitchen and cried.
i remember someone coming up from behind me and hugging me. But I quickly pushed them away. I wanted to be left alone.