11. Chapter 11
"How have you been?" I asked him.
I have been thinking about HIM all day and night.
I have missed HIM ever since I left.
I have dreaded the moment of seeing HIM again
It hurts me to see HIM like this.
It hurts me to see HIM.
When I look at James, I only see HIM.
I will always love HIM and only HIM.
I need HIM....
I bit my lip hard from holding back my tears. I thought all of the feelings I had for him were gone. But they aren't. I could see the pain in his eyes. I could see the sorrow in his eyes. I could see sadness in his eyes. Those eyes that I fell in love with. Those eyes that I woke up to. That emerald sparkle in those eyes. Those eyes of my lover....
"Good, how are you?" He muttered.
His eyes were glossy and he was trying to hold back his tears.
I felt like running into his arms.... But I can't,
I felt like kissing him.... But I can't,
I felt like holding him.... But I can't,
I felt like touching him.... But I can't,
I felt like telling him that i wont let him go..... but i cant,
I felt like hugging him and telling him that everything is going to be ok.... But I can't,
After everything that has happened.... I can't run back to him.
I won't let him win....
"Good" I muttered. My voice was cracking. I was in so much pain. It felt like someone is plunging a dagger into my heart and is repeatedly stabbing me with it. It hurts too much. He hurts too much. I can't do this!!
"How's James?" He asked with a tear escaping his eye and falling down his beautiful face. The tear brushed down his plump lip and he licked it off with his pink, moist tongue. He brought his hand up and wiped the tears off and sniffled.
"He's doing great, it was his first birthday last week" I said with my lip trembling. I don't think I can last much longer.
"Yeh, I know, I came around to your parents house but your mother told me that you deserve better so I went, but I gave her the gift, did you see it?" He asked with his voice weak and frail.
"Oh well I haven't seen it yet" I said and I forced myself to look up into his eyes. His eyes were so sad. I can't take this anymore!
"Elliot! Lets go now" I called out to him and Harry's face fell. My heart sank as the poison dipped words flew off my tongue.
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