I'm standing here on the stairs in my dressing gown, face aflame, staring at Harry Potter like a complete and utter buffoon, my thoughts racing madly. For the last millisecond, I've been trying to think of something to say.
So far, I've come up with these three things...
The First: HI! Hello there! I'm Ginny Weasley, your new personal stalker. Can I touch your hair?
The Second: Hi, how've you been? Ron's told me just about everything about you. I feel like I've known you for ages! I just know we're going to BEST friends!
The Third: I LOVE YOU.
Okay, scratch those... Let me start over...
Hi, I'm Ginny and I like your glasses! They're very nice - just like you! Um, wait?! What? No I didn't say anything...
That was just a sneeze.
You have a very good-looking nose. A pretty good face all together, really. Oh, erm, nevermind -I mean, that's not to say its not a good face... I just - Um, er, wait... What?!
I'm sorry, I just confused myself.
He-he-he… I, er, think you're a very nice person!
…Even though I've never actually talked to you. Yeah, like I've said, I'm kind of like your very own personal stalker…
Um, no. Disregard the previous statement, please. I take it back.
PLEASE DON'T THINK I'M WEIRD!
Merlin, I suck at this...
Cough - MARRY ME - cough.
Chirp, chirp... Are those crickets?
Uncomfortable silences make me sneeze.
Hem, hem... achoo...?
So... Hi! Hello! Greetings! Dandy Day, innit? Top o' the morning to you! HIYA HARRY!
Will you sign my lips? But, not with a quill. 'Cause that'd be weird... Erm, yeah... Your lips would work just fine, though.
You have green eyes! They're kind of like a pickled toad!
Except, y'know... without the toad part. 'Cause you're obviously not a pickled amphibian. You're Harry sodding Potter!
But... Er, I think you might've known that...
Anyway, what brings you to the place of my dwelling? And why THE HELL are you eating my toast? If I didn't want to marry you and bear your children, I'd kick your skinny ass!
Quite fortunately, none of those things came out of my mouth, but instead a strangled squeak was emitted and I ran - mortified - up the stairs and to my room.
Well, at least now I have a reasonably well thought out list of what NOT to say to Harry Potter.