Unsaid Feelings

Spencer DeSuza strives to get over her ex Dylan by avoiding the thoughts of him and going out, In the process of one of her outings, she comes across a certain Justin Bieber, With mutual feelings of heartbreak Spencer and Justin have the perfect bond, later turning into best friends. Justin gets Spencer through plenty including her ex boyfriend drama and later feelings of depression but when the charming Justin gets to her she can't help but be drowned with complicated feelings exploding in every direction. Will Spencer control these outraging feelings or will her emotions be better left unsaid?

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5. Try Honesty

    "Party, party party!" is the only thing I heard while walking down the halls. It was taking place at Lexie Harrison's house. Lexie is one of the most popular, rude and conceited people at our school but she's pretty which is all anyone seems to care about these days. I was still considering going though because I think it could be a really fun night for Justin and I. Nobody really knows about him yet except Brooke and I'm kinda nervous people will think of it more than it is.

" OMG! Are you coming to my party?!"

Speak of the devil.

"Of course Lex, wouldn't miss it!" -I replied smiling.

I've decided it's just better to be friendly to people even if they're snooty bitches. I was on my way back to my locker so I could pack up and leave this hell hole. As soon as I got home I'd ask Justin to join me.

  "Justin!" -I yelled into the phone as he picked it up.

"Hey you, what's up?" -he sounded extra happy today.

"Wanna join me for a party? It's tonight at 8 at I'd love for you to join me."

"I dunno... I mean I don't know anyone from your school and it's not like you've talked about me much," -he said sarcastically.

"C'mon Justin parties are all about getting to know each other and it will be no fun without my best friend!" -He laughed but agreed and hung up to get ready.

I have just realized that considering it's Lexie's party, Mellissa will be there meaning Dylan as well. Ugh. Can't I just get away from him? It's hard enough walking past someone in the hall that you know everything about and pretending you don't know them let alone partying with them. 'You'll be with Justin, just focus on Justin' I keep reminding myself. I opened my journal because I write things in it when I have stuff on my mind and I don't want it to stress me out. 

05/14/13

 I've been thinking. Justin is my really great friend now but what if he is to get a girlfriend? It's not like I'd be jealous but it might ruin things between me and him. I feel we not to be as close anymore or she won't allow him to talk to me. Gosh I hate when girls think they own guys like it's so anno...

I was distracted by my phone ringing. \

"Hello?"

"Picking you up.. see you soon Spence."

The line died. I wish he'd actually say goodbye before demanding or telling me something and just leaving me to deal with it. Oh well. I guess he wanted to go to dinner or something before hand.

Justin showed up outside with a red car. It was very nice but I don't know car types that well. It looked expensive for sure. I walked out saving him the trip to my door. He's leaned himself against the car with black jeans, red high tops and a white shirt with light red quarter sleeves. He always managed to look so damn good. Sure he's my best friend but I can still find him attractive.

"Hey pretty lady," -Justin said winking to me.

"Whatever Justin where are we going?" -I replied laughing.

He checked his watch.

"Oh am I early by 2 hours? Must have been a mistake." -he said in the most sarcastic way while smiling. I loved how he loved to have fun.

He took me out for a nice dinner at McDonald's but that's amazing for me. McDonald's is both Justin and I's favorite place to eat.

"Do you drink?" I asked suddenly. He just laughed.

"Yeah sometimes but I don't do it in my spare time no."

That was a good answer. We reached Lexie's house and he got out and opened the door for me. We walked in together and it was already clear half the people were wasted. It was so packed and Justin grabbed my hand to pull me through the crowd. Call me crazy but I felt something when he touched me. 'He's your best friend you'd never want to ruin that' I tell myself. We made it into a less packed area and we started up conversation. I could already see plenty of eyes looking my way but much more looking at him. Girls. Staring. Oh lord here it starts. I broke away to get a cooler because it's not too overpowered by alcohol and I was stopped at least 4 times.

"Who's he?"

"Are You Dating?"

"I'm so jealous,"

"He's a keeper"

When I returned he was talking to a girl. Black hair. A bit shorter than him. She turned around, where do I know her from.. she seems so familiar. Oh my god. It's Selena...They're laughing and smiling. I feel something in my stomach. It's not jealousy. It can't be. Just friends. I walked over.

"Oh hey, Selena this is Spencer." -Justin said motioning in my direction.

I smiled her way and I was returned with a stare down.

"See ya Sel" -Justin said to her before she walked off.

Sel.. he still has a nickname for her?

"So you seem pretty friendly.." -I said sarcastically on purpose.

"Just catching up. I guess she doesn't like how I've found someone else to spend time on. Forget about it. She's past news." -I faked a smile and continued with the night.

 

I've lost Justin. It's about 12:30. He'll show up I convinced myself. I went upstairs to get some quiet because I had a headache forming from the sound and the reek of alcohol and weed everywhere. I opened a door and it lead to what looks like a guest room. I sat on the bed facing the window and took out my phone. No texts from Justin. I heard the door open behind me assuming it's Justin. "Oh, hey lost you earlier..." -I got up and turned around expecting Justin.

"Dylan?"

I can't feel my body. Dylan is standing in the same room as me, staring me in the eye waiting for me to say more..

"You can't be here." -I said demanding him to leave.

"Oh yeaaaah. What aboout all thoose times when you said yooou looved me."

Definitely drunk.

"I'm sorry Dylan I have to go."

I walk to get past him and he pushed me back.

"You're not going anywhere Spen,"

Spen.. the nickname. I can feel my heart beating 1 million times a minute. He was stumbling around towards me.

"I know you still want me. When haven't you wanted me?"

He started to push against me breathing in my ear.

"It's funny because no matter who you're with, or what you do. You will always love me." -He started laughing like an idiot.

"Dylan I-"

"Sit the fuck down."

He was serious. I sat calmly on the bed scared to move. Oh Justin where are you?

"Now. I know things happened between us but you still miss having me right? Cuddling with me and napping together. I know you miss me."

He was really getting on my nerves. He became closer again and sat beside me.

"Kiss me."

Oh my god.

"No Dylan-"

"Did I ask a question. No It was a command. Kiss me."

I tried to get away but he pinned me down starting to run his hands up and down my body. I wanted to scream but no sound came out. Dylan is much more muscular and bigger than me that I had no chance in fighting back. I reached for my phone but he grabbed it and threw it at the wall. I could tell it was broken by the sound it made. He started to unzip my dress.

"Baby, tell me you love me." -I didn't respond.

"Fucking say it." I was unable to speak but I pushed out the words.

"I....love you."

It was hard but I definitely didn't mean it. He started to kiss my neck and run his hand up my leg beginning to go under my dress. It was happening. I was going to be raped by my ex boyfriend that I once loved..at least thought I loved. He started touching me and I could barely breathe. The door is pounded open and it swings and slams the wall. I'm able to squeeze out a word.

"Justin?"

 

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