It was all different now. New year, new beginning they said but that was never how it was for me, yet somehow it was this year. The travelling was over, the seeing my friends abroad all the time was over. I hated everyone and I was blaming everyone for the things that happened to me. My mum and my friends were pushed away because of the nightmares that suddenly appeared every night. My friends abroad died in those nightmares. The worst one was the one about my crush. That one guy that had been able to steal my heart even though he didn’t know me that well.
Was I crazy for being in love with him? Possibly, but I didn’t really care because all I wanted was to be around him. I guess it would never happen though, he was much more worth than I was so why?
I was known as Stalker Sarah 2.0 to the people of the internet and they were spending time sending me hate but I didn’t take it serious. Why would I? They were never going to have the balls to do anything to me if they actually did meet me.
When it was February I started going insane. I couldn’t keep myself in this cage any more. I felt trapped and forgotten and I needed to do something to keep my sanity, even though it was almost gone. The music had changed to the old punk rock that used to fill my speakers day out and day in when I was 14 years old. That’s when I went to London that’s where we first met. That’s where it all changed. That’s when everything went crazy. That’s when I became fully sane and at the same time insane.
All because of you
I was packing my bags Tuesday night. I didn’t know how long I was going to stay in London I just knew I had to do it. I had the money to stay for a couple of weeks and I had the friends to stay with, yet no one knew I was coming. I couldn’t tell them it was going to be a surprise. I was texting everyone and trying to get myself in my right mind but it was hard when I knew that in just a few hours I would be home.
The airport staff greeted me like I was an old friend of them and let me through within no time. They knew my name by now because I was flying with them so often. Always from the same airport and always with the same company, that was how I did it. Soon I was standing in the north of Essex not far from London, yet so far away. My English phone was switched on and I was taking just another draw of my cigarette before I saw my car appear in front of the airport where people were running around stressing because they didn’t know how to get through and airport.
“How was your flight Miss May?”
“It was lovely thank you James.”
I stepped on my cigarette after I had thrown it on the ground and given my suitcase to the same guy who always came with the car I was renting in London.
“All packed Miss. Enjoy your stay.”
“Thank you. I’ll give you a call when I know when I’m going back.”
“Thank you that’s great Miss.”
I got into the car and drove to the apartment I had booked for the week. I never booked hotels anymore I just took apartments. It was much easier for me and it felt more like a home. It took me just over an hour to get to the apartment and it was ready as promised. A really lovely apartment that I had stayed in a couple of times, the family was nice and they didn’t live far from here. We often ate out together when I was around.
As I had unpacked my stuff my phone started ringing and I immediately turned around and looked at the screen.
I picked it up not knowing who had called me.
“One Direction in London down by Piccadilly Circus, staying for a couple of days, you wanna come over and meet them”
“I don’t know. I’ll figure something out. Let me know if you meet them and tell Liam I said hi.”
“Thanks Kendra. You’re a sweetheart.”
“You too Diana. I’ll see you soon right?”
“Sooner than you think.”
I hung up on my friend before I turned back to my clothes. I changed into another outfit and texted the paparazzi I knew around here to hear more about the One Direction situation. I packed my cameras, yes cameras I was one of those people I was a stalker and I took pictures with the paparazzi that’s what I could do. That’s why people knew my name and that’s why I could afford to travel so much.
I packed my Nikon D4 fully upgraded into a bag and took my fully upgraded D5300 around my neck. I was wearing black tight jeans, converse and an oversized t-shirt. I mixed in with almost everyone I guess that’s why I was hard to notice but this day you did. My hair was hanging lose over my shoulders and lightly curled.
I picked up my phone when I was done packing and moved out. My sunglasses were in my bag, I knew I would need them otherwise I would go blind from all the flashes.
Rumour says you’re in London, what are you doing here?
I looked at the text I had just gotten from one of my best friends who lived in London. I couldn’t answer her right now; it wasn’t the time for this.
My ringtone came on again and I picked up the phone just as I locked the door to the apartment.
“Yeah what’s up Craig?”
“We need you down by the lake in Camden.”
“I’ll be there in 20, I’m on my way. What’s the situation?”
“Niall Horan and Harry Styles.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can. Keep me updated over the other phone.”
I hung up and drove my way to Camden. Everyone was going mental when I got there and it was hard to get through but as always I managed to sneak around. I knew my way around London, I knew it better than any other place and that’s why I did what I did. That’s why I made the money I did, because I always knew a way.
I called his name as I saw him, but hid myself so he couldn’t see me, and then started snapping pictures. I kept going and going. I got some pretty amazing shots and got him to look into the camera a couple of times. But soon more people came around and wanted my shots as well. That was the thing about this business, you never knew who would come and take your spotlight.
I ran a little down the small path by the lake and up around a way that wasn’t legal but I knew well because I had been taking pictures from here a few times.
I yelled his name out loud and he looked around, I got some amazing shots. Soon when he found me I hurried to leave before he could see my face properly.
That was how every day was for me. That’s how I lived my life when I was here.
After about an hour in Camden Harry and Niall disappeared and so did I. I drove back to the apartment and set up all of my laptops and stuff and started going through the pictures. Only until I felt my pocket and couldn’t find my phone. I had so many important numbers on that phone and I was now forced to publish that I wasn’t in Sweden where I came from. I had to tell them where I was and that I had lost my phone and which one of the phones it was. I felt like going back to Camden to look for it but knowing London I knew it was too late now.