I feel my breath get stuck in my throat, clawing, trying to find a way out but, I can't.
I look straight forward. Not moving a muscle, barley breathing at all.
The whole room is silent and I almost forget we're live with hundreds and thousands of people watching.
Ashton's tensed up and it feels like I'm leaning on a cement statue.
I finally turn to look at Luke and his eyes are wide and his mouth is open.
He turns his head to look at me and opens his mouth but when I shake my head he closes it.
I keep shaking my head, ignoring everyone's stares and walk out of the room, closing the door behind me.
He didn't even say sorry or come after me to even fucking apologies.
Great guy. I sure know how pick em' don't I?
I just keep walking, I don't even care where I'm going. I make it the elevator and step in. I don't even push a button I just let it close and go where ever.
I slowly back up, my back hitting the cool mettle. I slide down and I feel like I just got smacked in the face with a sludge hammer.
The tears come full on and I still wonder why I'm crying over this. I mean, I knew he cheated before but it hurts when your faced with cold hard truth.
I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs to hold them up and I just let it out.
The door open and I notice I'm at the roof. Well well well.
I slowly make my way over to the edge and I look down. It's a really long drop.
I bet I could count to at least 60 seconds before hitting the ground.....
I sit down on the ledge of it and close my eyes.
No, I'm not gonna jump. Even though that idea doesn't sound so bad right now.....
I take a deep breath and let it out.
Just as I'm about to open my eyes, I feel my self being tugged away from the edge and falling on my back.
I close my eyes and groan in pain. God damn it that hurt.
"What the fuck do you think your doing?" A voice snaps at me and I open my eyes to meet Michael's worried teary but slightly pissed off ones as he hovers over me to see if I'm okay.
When I don't answer he sighs, sitting up and pulls me up to so we're both sitting on the ground of the roof.
"Please don't." He whispers and I blink a few times. He wrap as his arms around me and nuzzles his face in the crook of my neck.
"Don't what." I ask, my voice horas from crying.
"Don't take your own life. Please." He says barley above a hushed whisper as he rubs his nose on my neck. I feel my shoulder get wet and I realize that he's crying.
I close my eyes, trying to think where I messed up in my life to get it to be this crazy and out of control.
I then wrap my arms around Michael taking him by surprise but he just holds me tighter.
We sit like that for who knows how long........
I groan rolling over into something soft and I slowly open my eyes, expecting it to be bright as fuck but I'm met by darkness again.
I slowly sit up and notice that I'm still on the roof and I go to stand up but I'm pulled back down by something. Okay more like someone.
I look down to my right and see Michael sleeping. His arms still around my waist and he curls into a ball. When did Michael fall asleep? Hell when did I fall asleep?
I quickly shake my head and then I lightly shake Michael.
He groans. "Five more minutes please."
I silently chuckle and shove him again.
"Fuck off." He says in a warning tone.
I shove him again but harder then before.
"Okay, who the fuck is- oh. It's you." He says his whole face changing in a matter of seconds. He gives me a soft smile and yawns.
"Why are we still outside?" He asks and I shrug my shoulders.
"Let's go back inside. The others are probably wondering where we are." He says standing up and dusting off his jeans. He holds his hand out for me to take and I gladly accept.
He pulls me up and we walk to elevator. When we get in I walk over and lean against him with a yawn.
He rests his chins on top of my head and I can feel him smile as he wraps his arms around my small figure.
The little ding tells us were on our floor and we depart walking towards our room.
Michael doesn't hesitant to open and walk in but I do. I take a shaky breath and run a hand through my messed up hair.
What time is it anyway?
I walk in and all eyes turn toward me and I freeze on the spot, tempted to turn around and run out again.
"Stevie-" Luke steps toward me and Calum stands in front of me, glaring at his former band mate.
"Don't even go near her Luke." He snaps and Luke's face is shocked along with the rest of us. Calum doesn't usually get into other peoples stuff and he's usually quiet.
"I just-" Cal cuts him off again.
"Just shut up Luke. I don't want to hear it and I'm pretty sure no one else does either." He sneers and Luke's face is as pale as a ghost.
Luke then meets my eyes but I look down, not even bothering to hide the hurt anymore.
There's no point. No point in anything really.
He sighs and walks past me and out the door.
Not even saying sorry. Not that saying sorry would fix everything but it still would have been nice.
That and Calum wouldn't let him talk to me. Not that I'm complaining or anything.
Well Luke's not nice so I understand.
I take a shaky sigh and run my shaking hands through my hair as all the boys look at me with concern.
I shake my head walking over to my bag and pulling out my pjs and changing in the washroom. When I'm done I walk out and it's just Michael on his bed probably on Twitter.
I climb in next to him and he blinks a couple times at me a little stunned that I crawled in next to him.
I wrap my arms around him holding him tight and he puts his arm around me. He turns the light off and lays down, pulling me into his chest and rubs my arm soothingly.
I close my eyes hopping today was all just a bad dream and I'll wake up tomorrow and be happy.
Or maybe just maybe I won't wake up at all.
I'm leaning toward the last one.....