I know I haven't updated in forever but I've got bad writers block and I'm kind of, you know. Sick of this.
I love how it turned out for the most part but the last few chapters have been hard to figure out.
So yeah. I'll try to update I soon I promise.
I'm truly sorry guys.
I sigh as I look at Michael. "Well what do you want me to say?" I say feeling like I'm gonna cry forever.
"Who's the dad?" He asks softly.
"Ashton." I say and he sighs.
"I actually should have known this but wow I am to stupid to even realize." He says and I nod my head.
After a moment of silence he breaks it. "Did you tell him yet?"
I'm not sure if he's talking about Ashton or Luke..... Ashton cause he's the dad and Luke, cause.... He may be an asshole but he still holds a part of my heart close to him.
I sigh. "Depends who your talking about..." I say and he shoots me a sad smile.
"What's wrong Stevie?" He asks softly and I rub my face.
Tears fall from my eyes suddenly and he frowns. I sniffle. "I still love Luke." I mumble and he whistles low.
"Well then." He whispers.
I sigh. "Wow this is just peachy. I feel like such a slut." I say chuckling watery and his frown deepens.
"Your not a slut Stevie Rae, don't say that." He scolds me and I bite my lip.
"Then why do I feel like one?" I whisper out. I shake my head. "It's the worst feeling.... Well for me."
"I understand why you did what you did." He says and I lean my head against the window.
"Then why did I do this?" I ask Michael without taking my eyes from looking out the window.
"Because. Luke hurt you. Very badly. And Ashton was there...." He says and I furrow my eyebrows.
"We haven't left the parking lot yet." I say trying to change the subject.
He gives me a pointed look. "Stevie."
Then I sigh groaning. "I don't want to talk about it."
"We have to."
I narrow my glossy eyes at him.
"And why so?"
"Well what are you gonna do with the kid when it's time? What about Ashton and Luke?" He asks and I groan again but louder this time.
"Michael. Please. This is to much... I'm still a kid myself." I say and he sighs.
"Fine, we'll talk when we get to your place." He says before finally pulling out of the parking lot.
We drive in silence and I tap my fingers against my leg.
We pull up to my house and my throat closes up.
How am I suppose to tell Ashton this after I told him he's the dad?
Well my life's fucked isn't it.
The correct answer it yes. Yes it is.
We get out of the car and I go right up to my room, Michael hot on my trail.
We go into my room and he shuts and locks the door behind him. He then Marie's his eyes at me and I sit at the head of my bed and hold a pillow close to me.
"Why does every bad thing happen to me?" I mumble and he sighs walking over to me.
He takes a seat in front of me and grabs my hands from the pillow.
"You'll be fine. I know it." He says and I feel really sick and like crying.
I give him a tight smile. "Can you just go for a little? I'll message you later.... I just need some sleep." I say looking down but I glance up at him with big eyes. "Please?"
He sighs and nods his head. He leans in and kisses the top of my head before leaving.
When I hear my front door close I look down at my flat-ish stomach....
Kind of flat. Well it won't be for long.
What am I gonna tell my mom? Or my friends?
Or anyone for that matter cause right now only Ashton and Michael know.
And I tend to keep it that way.
Well, for as long as I can that is.
I pull my knees up close to my chest and start to cry like there's no tomorrow.
Why do I always get screwed on my end?
First I get cheated on, then I sleep with his best friend then I end up pregnant with his best friends kid and I realize I still have feelings for the one who cheated on me to behind with.
The one who started all this.
What if the baby wasn't born?
I shake my head to get rid of the thought just as soon as it appeared.
No, it may be only a couple weeks old but it's still a living being.
I can't be a mom.
My eyes widen at the thought.
No, I can't I'm so not ready. I can barely keep myself alive let alone another small human being.
Both of us will end up dead then.
But, would that really be a bad thing?