I Fell In Love With The Boy Across The Aisle
~17 Years Ago~ (Part 2)
"SLAM!" was the noise that shook the whole house as I slammed my bedroom door
The tears were becoming more current and the sobs were starting to come out now. Harry, our friendship, our memories, all gone. All gone and down the drain.
My back hit the white wooden door of my room as I slowly fell to the ground. The tears stained my blue shirt as I cried into it. This couldn't be happening, Harry was the closest thing I had to a best friend. We never did say we were each other best friends, I didn't know why at the time but, I guess I do now. The whole act of him 'caring' about me was probably just an act, he never cared, he never gave to hecks about me. He probably just used me as a friend since he knew no one else, until now.
It was all a stupid, lame pathetic lie.
~ONE HOUR LATER~
I had practically cried all my tears out now. My cheeks were a rosy red and my eyes were a bright pink from all the crying and dried tears. Now all that was left was anger. A huge amount of anger and little bit of sadness, not much sadness but a great amount of anger.
My mum wasn't home from work yet since today was a Friday, she always worked later than usual. I guess you could say it was good that she wasn't here, I didn't want her to see me all broken down over some stupid boy, just like she did with dad when he left.
And that's right.
I called Harry Styles, stupid.
I, Paulina Montgomery, just called Harry Styles, my current ex-friend stupid and have no regrets! Well.....maybe just a little.
"AHHH!" I suddenly shout, I wanted to get all this anger out, all of this stupid anger out
My boots hit my wooden floor as I walked back in forth on it. I didn't know what to do. Right now all I wanted to do was go back to Harry's house and tattle-tale on his sorry bum and another part of me wanted to go and rip all the pages of his favorite book series, Harry Potter, to little tiny bitty shreds. I had so many ideas of what to do but, suddenly came to a quick stop when my blue eyes caught something.
There on my wooden desk laid my perfect spiral notebook and my fuzzy pen.
That was what I was going to do. I was going to write my anger away. I was going to show Harry what he did to me, how he made me feel and spread my anger all over the letter. I'd make him feel my pain that I feel. So, without hesitating I sat down on my small chair and picked up the pen. Mrs.Elliot always told us to express our emotions in our writing in class so, that is what I'm going to do now. I'm going to express my emotions, all of it.
Dear Harry (Mr. Montgomery),
5 years old Harry. 5 years old when we met each other. I remember a lot from that day. The bakery, the library, your house, the tree house and the promise you made me.
I really don't know what to write but I guess I'll just start out with the good, like Mrs.Elliot always tells us to do- point out the goods before you point out the bads.
We had a good friendship for 3 years I think you can say. Walking to school and walking home from it, having fun playdates and sleepovers, building forts, reading each other Harry Potter series, watching funny things on the tele and listening to music on mummy's phone. Our memories were good and I hope you will have them forever with you. I have one favourite playdate in my mind in our 3 year friendship, the first sleepover. Remember that Harry?
I don't know if I'm going to spell everything right but here-
It was last year, we were both 7! The age where we could finally have our 1st sleepover! I remember being very excited, like I am on Christmas. It was my birthday and my mum said I could have one friend stay the night for the first time in my life. Harry, you were my only friend that I had before, Emma, Trinity, Jade and Lilly, and I knew that I 100% wanted to invite you. So. The first thing I did when I woke up was called you and screamed into the phone. "MR.MONTGOMERY! YOU ARE SLEEPING AT MY HOUSE TONIGHT! COME OVER AT THREE! BYE."
The rest of the day before 3 I couldn't control myself. I was jumping everywhere. I had candy and popcorn with the help of my mum sitting on the table. I pulled out the big mattress from the 3rd floor and set it up on the floor. Next, I took all our favorite movies and put them next to the tele for us to watch later. It was at least 2:55p.m. when I was done and my mummy was cleaning the candy that I spilled as I skipped around the house. The 5 minutes felt like 1 hour before I heard you knock. I ran towards the door and opened it to your normal curls and dimple smile. I still love that smile Harry and I always will.
That night held a lot of laughter, movies and sugar-exitment when we decided to go on my roof. We didn't tell mummy because we knew she wouldn't let us so, we thought it was an amazing idea. Not listening to my mum made us look like naughty children and it felt funny to be one. The sky was very clear and you could see all the stars. They looked so pretty Harry! Like a pretty lightbulb high in the sky. So high that we couldn't reach them.
We both sat on the stubby stone on my roof as we laid down together, both of our eyes looking at the sky. None of us talked it was too perfect to do so, it was one of those moments where silence made everything cute, beautiful and amazing.
I remember how we laid there for a few minutes before you finally spoke. "You see that bright star up there Mrs.Styles?" you asked
I nodded in response, looking at the shiny star that you were pointing at. "That star is my favourite star out of all of them." you said
"Why?" was what I asked, which made you say-
"Because its named after you, Mrs.Styles." you looked down on me, your pretty green eyes looked at my blue ones
I smiled at you, the gesture you made was so cute! I couldn't believe how much of an amazing friend you were!
"You see that star next to it Mr.Montgomery?" I said finally
You also nod in response before I spoke again. "That star is named after my favourite person in the WHOLE world!" I shouted whole
"It's name is Mr.Montgomery!" I giggled
I remember you saying that those two stars would always be together Harry. You said that as long as those two stars stayed next to each other we would be friends forever.
Well, I guess the stars moved because, we aren't anymore are we?
Here's the bad now Harry.
I know what you did Harry. I know that you showed your friends the tree house. The tree house that ME AND MY DAD made together! A thing that I showed you and only you! How could you Harry?! How could you show something to people that meant so much to me. I so badly wanted to tell on you, rip the Harry Potter pages from your book collection but, I didn't. I decided to write this letter instead.
But, even showing your friends the tree house wasn't enough. You called me 'lame' and told them I had cooties and would never be seen with me.
Now that Harry hurt, it hurt a lot.
When I came home I cried a lot. So much. Crying over you made me realize how my mummy used to cry over daddy. I remember waking up at night to hear her crying in the kitchen. All this crying made me remind myself that someone who made a big promise in my life left.
Someone who was the world to me.
Harry you were the world to me! You told me you would protect me against the world! You said you would never leave!
AND YOU DID HARRY! YOU LEFT ME! YOU LEFT ME TO BE AGAINST THE WORLD BY MYSELF.
Harry Styles you lied to me.
I don't think I want to be friends anymore Harry, I'm sorry. Please don't be sad cause I know you want this too. You even told your new friends you didn't like me so I don't see why we should be.
So, I guess I'll see you around school then?
I shoved the letter into a blue envelope before I wrote 'Harry' on it. I didn't want to read the letter again, I cried too much already. If I read the letter I know I wouldn't want to send it to him.
My boots banged against the stairs while I ran down them. I ran past the front door, down the stairs, past my mailbox, down the street and stopped in front of the familiar red house. A small smile formed on my face as I remembered the good times me and Harry had together, I was going to miss him, I'll admit that. The black mailbox stood in front of me as my right hand landed on the handle. A deep breath left my cold lips before I opened it.
So without thinking, I slipped it in, putting it on top of the other piles of letters and junk mail.
Then I walked away, not looking back.
Harry was just another part of my past now.
Just like my daddy was too.