I nodded slowly and the looks on their faces, made me want to pass out or hurl.
"Let go of my hood." I said stepping away from him. He let go and his eyes... he looked like a lost puppy. I bit my lip and walked back to another part of the room. Actually i locked myself into the bathroom. I let my tears fall silently, not daring to make a peep, as for i don't want them asking if im alright. I heard them talking, and i looked around the room. I left my bag out there... great. I can't do my "Special business." In frustration i took my hood off and stared at myself in the reflection. I was standing there in my bra and pants. Mascara was very runny, my blue eyes looked grey, my hair a mess, my arms full of scars and i really don't want the lads seeing those. The bruises... cuts.... i put my hands to my face as i slid slowly down the wall.
I heard a light knocking on the door. I didn't budge. "Alex, love?" Irish accent. "Yeah?" I said nonchalantly . "Are you okay?" I grabbed my hood and put it back on. I walked to the door unlocking it, just to go for my bag and look for my shower stuff. "I need to shower... i'll be quick about it." I said while wiping my tears as i walk back in, locking the door, setting the shower stuff in the shower and my clothes on the counter. I start the shower, i love showers because you can't hear nor tell if a person is crying or not. I cry for a few minutes then i get going and finish taking my shower.
After i was finished i wrap a towel closely around my body and step out, drying my body and wrapping the towel around my hair. I quickly put all my clothes on, meaning my pajamas that consist of sweats and a tank top. I put on mis matched socks, because i cant sleep without socks on. I put the towel back on the shelf and i brush my hair and blow dry it, which doesn't take long. I slowly unlock the door as i walk out and the lads all just stop talking. I just carry my clothes to the basket and go to the couch and sit.
"Love, you tired?" well it was kind of early in the morning... I just got up and walked to a bed and i was literally out right when i closed my eyes.
"She must have been really really tired." I whispered to the lads. "Mate, we should have came sooner. She is literally bones!" Harry exclaimed. I looked over to her, "I feel so sorry for her..." I said feeling my eyes water. "Mate, lets get some sleep we can talk to her tomorrow.." Liam said, already heading to his bed. There were only 5 beds... so, i decided to sleep on the couch. And i slowly fell asleep.
The next morning i woke up and looked around the room. The lads were still sleeping, well all but Louis. He looked over to me and he smiled. "Morning love." I waved to him and said "Morning." He got up from his bed and joined me on my bed. "Sleep well?" I nodded, smiling. "How long has this bullying been going on?" "I don't know... it's been going on for a while now.." I said while looking at his hands. "Well, is there anything else going on? Besides your......" He looked upset for asking. "N-no. And it's fine Boo.... Louis." He looked at me and half smiled. "Boo bear." I laughed and laid down, and looked up at him. He is beautiful... his parents did a good job! All of their parents did."
"well love, im going to start making breakfast, of course im gong to feed you first." He said while jumping up and heading to the kitchen. I got up and grabbed clothes to change into. I went to the bathroom and put on a black pair of skinny jeans and a white tank with a white hoodie on top. I brushed my hair and teeth and walked out putting my pajamas up. But i managed to trip over my bed and i made a loud noise, waking the other lads up and having a running louis come to me. "I'm fine Boo Bear, i just tripped over the bed." Harry looked at me, "You call us by our nicknames?" I nodded, i could feel my face getting hot.
Lou left and i was sitting in the middle of the room. "Love aren't you hot?" Niall asked. Yes i was very hot, its hot outside and its warm in here. "No." I lied. "Yeah right, it's 76 in here. You can take your hoodie off." Liam said while getting up. "N-no thanks. I get cold easily." Zayn was studying me again. Great. "Alex, can i see you out in the hall for a moment." Zayn said already heading for the door. I just followed grabbing the ends of my sleeves in my hands. "Roll the sleeves up." I looked at him weird. "No thanks." "Alex. Now." "Zayn. No." He pushed me slightly against the wall, holding my arms above my head. "Roll the sleeves up or we do this my way." I tried to get out of his grasp... looks like it's going to be DJ Maliks way. He put both my arms in one hand and kept it held against the wall, while he puled the sleeves up. His eyes grew a little bit wide.
"Zayn please, let go." I said barley above a whisper. "Why did you do that to your beautiful skin?" "I was being bullied, my parents neglected me, i was feeling worthless. I don't know." I was now crying. "You can't tell the others Zayn. You just can't." Zayn shook his head, letting my arms go, and i quickly pulled my sleeves back down. "I can't do that. Were here to save you, we need to know about what marks are there... any anywhere else?" "No." He nodded and we walked in together. "Zayn what's wrong?" Liam asked, I forgot to wipe my eyes.
Zayn looked at me, basically the look he gave me was "you tell them or i will." I just stayed quiet while he spoke. "Our little princess here, has more than just being too skinny." Niall looked up at me, looking from my face to Zayns. Zayn slowly grabbed my hand and turned me to face him, he unzipped my jacket and took it off." Niall nearly spat his drink out and Louis let water come out of his mouth. I refused to make eye contact with any of them. "Alex look at us." Harry said. I slowly looked up at just him, no one else.
"Love you shouldn't do that to your beautiful skin." He said, i could tell he was holding back tears. "I had no one. Luckily i failed at suicide." I mumbled the last part. "You failed at what?!" Niall asked loudly. That made me jump. I just crossed my arms and focused on Harry, he could tell i was about to break down right there. He got up and we walked into the kitchen alone and i cried into his chest. "Harry im so so sorry!"
He hugged me and i felt my shoulder was getting a little bit wet. "Please don't cry for me." I said to him. I just kept my face buried in his chest as he rubbed my back slowly. We stayed like this for what felt like hours, but in reality about 30 minutes. I then pulled away from him, wiping my eyes, then crossing my arms to hide most of the marks. "Im sorry." I said again. "Love, as long as you don't continue and you don't attempt suicide again... it's okay." I started to cry again. Harry was too and soon the other lads joined the kitchen.
"I'm sorry." I said to the others. I am a huge waste of their time. I wish i never even DM's Niall on twitter... But im saved to i can't regret it fully, can i?
Well i used one of my free days to update this.
Earlier i kind of took a nap so i guess its lucky that i even updated. Well i gotta go its midnight so.... Bye stars!!