Hey! I'm sorry if you hate me but I just can't help myself. I really wanted to update before I lost my train of thought. Sorry. Read if you want.
Songs for this chapter "My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson. "Na Na Na" by One Direction
I woke up and shut my alarm off. I called my aunt. "Hey Aunt Jen." I greeted.
"Hello, darling." I could hear a smile. I faked a cough. "I'm still not feeling well. I'll pick up my homework later. Or just have Niall Horan drop it off at my dorm." I said.
"Okay. But are you sure your gonna be alright? Should I call a doctor?" She asked.
"No. I'm fine. Just a little cold that's all." I said.
"Love you." She hung up.
I groaned and laid back in my bed. I haven't moved from my bed since the break up, three days ago.
Niall, Liam, Louis, and Zayn have been texting to see if I was okay, but I've ignored them. I grabbed the pizza box from my stand and took a piece out.
Breakups suck. I smelled something really disgusting. I lifted my arm and sniffed. Okay ew. This was enough. I got up and went to the shower. I'm still not going to school though.
I got out of the shower and put on some sweats and a cropped top. I brushed my hair and fishtailed it to the side. I started to clean. If he doesn't wanna be with me, why should I be sad? His loss, right?
After my room was clean I inhaled the fresh scent. "Now that's better." I said opening the curtains.
"Come on, mate. You have to go to school sometime." Zayn pointed.
"I really," I added a fake cough. "Really don't feel well."
"Cut the act, we both know something is going on. Now, what is it?" Louis demanded.
"Nothing, nothing is wrong." I yelled.
"Mate, you've been in this room for three days straight and you refuse to go anywhere else! Did something happen?" Liam asked.
"I broke up with Jayda." I murmured.
"Why? You're head over heels in love with her." Niall stated.
"That's why! I don't deserve her. I keep breaking her heart, and I don't want her to be sad anymore." I cried.
"Haz, what do you think you're doing to her now? She hasn't been to school. She probably is in bed crying her heart out because of this. You didn't want to break her heart, but you actually did." Liam pointed out.
"Fuck." I muttered. "I can't believe myself. I'm so stupid."
I hopped out of bed and got dressed. "Thanks boys." I said.
I sat on the couch in the living room and turned on Faking It. I grabbed some Oreos and crossed my legs on the couch. This was my favorite show and I was not leaving this spot until it was over.
Really? I paused the show and put my Oreos down.
"I'm coming, Jesus!" I shouted.
I opened the door to see Harry. I closed the door but his foot jammed in it causing it to stay open.
I leaned against the door frame. "What do you want?" I narrowed my eyes.
"Can we talk?" He asked. I crossed my arms. "Please?"
I rolled my eyes and stepped aside so he could come in. I sat on the couch and waited for him to talk. "I thought that if I left, I wouldn't break your heart anymore, but by leaving I just shattered it." He started.
"No shit! I was crying in the cafe so badly that I fell asleep there! I drive home crying! I came and broke almost everything in this place and I made a hole in the wall that I now have I pay 500 dollars for! I sat in my room and cried for three days! I didn't move at all! I haven't been to school! My mum was right."
"What do you mean 'your mum was right'? He asked.
"She told me that it was stupid to be with you because you broke me and you'd just do it again." I said choking back the tears.
"I'm sorry, babe. I love you! More than anything in this world. I can't live without you! I sat in my room this whole time thinking how stupid I am and how much of an arse I am. I need you." He cried.
I was now crying too. "If you loved me, you wouldn't have left. You wouldn't have broke me, Harry! You would've did everything in your power not to hurt me!" I shouted.
"Don't say that! I do love you! Very, very much. I thought I was making things better!" He shouted.
"I hate you Harry! I hate the fact that I can't love without you! I hate that I love you so much it hurts! I hate your beautiful eyes! I hate you!" I shouted.
"You don't me that, love! You're my world. You mean everything to me!" He pleaded.
"Get out." I whispered.
"What?" He asked.
"GET OUT!" I shouted, "AND NEVER COME BACK!"
He hesitated if he should leave. He stood up and started to walk towards me. I pushed him. "Leave!" I shouted. I pushed him again. "Go away!"
He grabbed my wrists and pushed me against the wall. He kissed me. I pushed him off and smacked him. "Get out of my fucking dorm." I said.
"GET OUT NOW!" I pushed him out of the door.
I slid down on the door and held my head in my hands.
I hate him. But I love him so much. And it doesn't make sense at all.