Valentines Day! A day couples and loved ones spend together, cherishing each other with box of chocolates and flowers. Hand in hand, they stroll merrily. While there’s me; peering away from my balcony window, just watching them with envy. There so lucky, all those couples; they have one another, and there in love. Love; I wonder how that feels like. Love is something which is special; it could be beautiful or dangerous. Especially if your partner was a controlling freak; who would never let you talk to other guys or have any freedom. Love must be so blissful, with couples eating there mouths off, and gazing lovingly at each other, and then I wonder. Haven’t you guys stare at each other any other day, and kiss each other every day. Love is beautiful, but something which I have not experienced, and maybe I never will. For me love was a thing you find in book; in stories where guys and girls bump into each other and immediately fall in love. Love seemed beautiful, but could also be fake. Love, was something I always thought you can only be sought out in stories. If I could have one wish, it would not be to find a true love. No way, it would be so that my thirteen year old brother Ren would wake up. He had been in an accident a year ago, and was now in coma. Just lying there, motionless; I should have protected him. My older sister Eri appears from the doorway. She looks at me and sighs. I know what she seems as she looks at me; a baggy jumper with food stains, trousers that are too big for me, my hair wild and crazy, large circles under my eyes. I look at her; the complete opposite of me wearing skinny jeans, and a new top, her hair curled and glossy brown, all ready for her date. Eri walks towards me, and then holds my cheek gently with kindness.
“Kazumi, you need to go out.” Eri tells me kindly.
“Go out where Eri. Where should I go, to the hospital to see our brother? Haven’t you forgotten he is still in coma, lying there?” I tell Eri feeling upset.
“I do remember. That it was my fault. I was the one driving the car, it should have been me in coma not him. Don’t you think I remember, don’t you think I care. I do, more than you will ever know Kazumi. But while you stay here and wander around like a ghost. I try to recover, to be strong for Ren, for you Kazumi.” Eri tells me angrily, tears trickle down her beautiful face.
I watch her cry, not knowing what to do. Normally, it was me crying, and Eri comforting me. I had never seen my sister cry before. I suddenly remember when I hear someone crying upstairs. I always thought it was a ghost, but now I realize that it was my sister. My sister was the one that was always crying. She was just like me, upset and blaming herself; only she would hide her feelings and keep it to herself.
“I’m sorry Eri. I didn’t know.” I tell Eri gently.
“It’s fine Kazumi. Everything is fine. Have I ever asked you anything to do Kazumi?” Eri questions me.
I realize that Eri never ask me anything to do, whatever I want Eri gets for me. Even if it meant, that she didn’t get what she wanted.
“No, you never asked me anything to do.” I reply honestly, wondering what her question would lead up to.
“Kazumi, if I ask you something to do. Will you do it for me?” Eri asks looking at me.
“Yes I will Eri.” I reply to Eri.
Questions and doubt now began filling up my head. What would Eri ask me to do now? What if it was something I could not do; like falling in love, or to become more sociable.
Beads of sweat trickle down Eri face, and she looks at me curiously.
“I want you to go outside, go and talk to people. Do something, it’s Valentines Day. If maybe you went out more, and talked to people more. You would find a valentine, and maybe have some friends.” Eri told me.
“I don’t need friends Eri. I don’t want a valentine Eri. I don’t need anyone. I have you Eri, and I have myself and I have Ren. Isn’t that enough people Eri.” I ask Eri back.
“Ren does not talk to you Kazumi, and me. You rarely even speak to me anymore. All you do is just wander around like a ghost always sad and mopy. Please Kazumi for me.” Eri begs of me.
“Fine. I will go out, but if I don’t like it or don’t enjoy myself. Don’t blame it on me.” I tell Eri.
“I won’t. Thank you so much Kazumi.” Eri tells me.
“Yeah. Yeah.” I mumble bored.
I walk towards the door, wondering how it would be outside.
“Kazumi. One thing.” Eri calls out to me.
“What is it now?” I ask, turning my head.
“Get dressed. If I were you, I would go and change into something a little nicer.” Eri tells me.
I look down at my clothes; the stains on my jumper, my black hair wild and crazy.
“Fine, but don’t expect much.” I tell Kazumi.
I run upstairs, and brush my long black hair, and slips on a pink top, and a pink skirt. I slip on some jewellery, and look at myself in the reflection. I look different, I don’t even recognize myself. I run downstairs, and watch my sister look at me with astonishment, her mouth open wide.
“You look beautiful.” Kazumi tells me.
“Yeah. Yeah. I’m going out.” I tell Kazumi, taking my handbag, and then opening the door.
I step outside, into the beautiful sunny weather. The sun shines brightly, and the trees dance elegantly. I brush a strand of my hair behind my ear, and then walk around. I really did not know where I was going. I suddenly bump into someone, I fall to the floor. I stand up, watching the stranger who bumped into me, just watching, and not even apologizing. The guy had red hair, and green eyes.
“Excuse me, you could at least say sorry.” I tell the stranger.
“And why should I, you were the one running onto me like a madwoman.” The stranger tells me.
“Mad woman. You were the one bumping into me, god. Jerk.” I mutter under my breath, but not quiet enough for him to not hear me.
“Brat.” He mutters.
“Excuse me.” I interrupt.
“Brat. That’s what you are.” The guy tells me.
“Jerk, and that’s what you’re.” I tell the guy, shoving past him angrily.
First him, and then my sister. God, what a stupid day. Valentines day, a day which will never end.