Clara has always had social anxiety, but with every year it gets worse, until one year everything is too much for her. Everything she's been through has shaped her into someone she never would have imagined. Her wrists and thighs are stained, and people have begun to see through her disguise. They've made her into the monster she's become. Can she escape all the bullies and her thoughts, or will she give in to the pain?


8. Busing home

As bad as school is, home can be worse, and there's some days when Clara just can't put up with anything else. 

Jessie and Clara skipped last period so that Jessie could talk to Clara, explain everything to her, and let it all go. 

Clara checked the time and whimpered. 5 minutes util the last bell."I don't want to go home." she sighed exhaustively.

"It's okay, I'm sure you'll be fine." Jessie reassured her. He tossed his backpack over his shoulder and helped Clara to her feet before giving her a hug, and leaving. She watched as he dissapeared through the doors and down the next hallway.

Before setting off for the bus Clara took a deep breath and unwrapped her headphones, they could be her escape for just a little. She turned on some music, doesn't matter which song, as long as the voices around her are inaudible. 

Clara decided to walk up a few stops and be able to get a seat before everyone else got on the bus at the school. She had her seat, against the widow in the back. 

When the bus got to the stop beside her school she tried to ignore everyone getting on, but for some reason was drawn away from her window and musical sanctuary to look at one of the familiar faces that was walking towards her; Brian.

He was with his best friend since forever Aleksa, they were basically always together, especially if Jessie wasn't around. There were a couple other people with them too, another boy and girl from our grade. They walked over and stood beside the back door, they would be getting off in only a few stops anyway.

I felt the bus rumble to life again and start moving forwards, but I couldn't take my eyes off of them. I couldn't hear what any of them were saying but I watched Brian. He pushed his hand back through his hair and laughed. I could hear the familiar laugh play in my head. His smile was beautiful, and the way he held himself was just so adorable. I couldn't help but smile as I noticed the little things he did, and has always done. The familiarity was comforting, to know that he was still the same Brian I'd known the year before. 

The smile on Clara's face was familiar yet distant. She hadn't smile so purely and truly in a long time, but it was familiar because she used to be quite happy. Even just at the beginning of last year, Clara found herself smiling quite often, she had started over, had new, and old friends, everything was a fresh start that would just blossom, or so she had thought. 

Too soon it was time for Brian and his friends to get off the bus. They waved and shouted to many people from our school who were also on the bus, and Clara thought that for a moment Brian's eyes had rested on her as he waved. 

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