Love, Loss, and Tattoos

(Note: This is my first FanFic and story that I'm posting on Wattpad so it might be crappy. Please be nice and bear with me here >~<) Sarah Bell has been through some really rough times, and she still does to this day. Her parents died when she was too young to remember and was put into many foster homes at a very young age. She ran away from her recent foster home at the age of 15. She is now 18 and lives in an old shabby apartment in New York City by herself where she struggles to survive and pay rent and can barley afford to take care of herself. But, on one fateful day, while roaming the streets of New York City, she meets a guy that will change the rest of her life forever. Good and bad. Nothing will ever be the same again for Sarah Bell. People will fall in love, hearts will be broken and tears will be shed.


4. Chapter 4

The next day was Christmas Day and, for once, I wasn't alone.

This time Zayn picked me up in his motorcycle and we sped off towards the ice skating rink.

When we got to the rink the guys payed for the ice skates for us girls. I waited at the entrance with Danielle and Eleanor for the boys to come with our skates.

They finally arrived and I saw Zayn walk towards me with two pairs of ice skates and a big smile on his face that I reflected back at him. He handed me a pair of skates and our hands brushed for an instant before I took them out of his hands and was in the process of putting them on.

It was strange. I actually felt a spark between us, or was it just me?

I finished tying my skates and watched as the others stepped onto the rink and started skating away into the crowd of people. I stood at the entrance and realized something terrible. I didn't know how to skate. This was going to be so embarrassing.

I was going to make a fool of myself. What if they laughed at me? What if I fell on my butt? I was about to back out when something behind me stopped me. I turned around to see Zayn looking down at me.

He gave me that smile that sent shivers through my body and I always found myself smiling back.

"You ready?" he asked with eagerness in his voice.

"I kinda, don't know how to ice skate," I said nervously, but the smile never left his face.

"Good," he said and led me onto the rink, hand in hand.

In fear of falling down, and without thinking, I wrapped my arms around his waist for dear life.

I heard his heart beat quickly against my ear and his chest rumbled as he laughed. I looked up at him and realized the position I was in when Louis and Eleanor passed by laughing at us.

I immediately straightened myself out and stretched my arms out for balance.

Suddenly, someone grabbed my hand and pulled me away from Zayn and spun me around in a circle. I had to admit, it was actually kind of fun and I couldn't stop myself from laughing.

When I stopped, I found myself facing Harry giving me a flirtatious smirk. I didn't think anything of it so I laughed at him and then Niall joined us. He seemed to be enjoying himself.

"Hey, mind if I join you guys?" he asked and smiled.

"I can't skate," I said looking back and forth at them.

"No problem," said Harry and he took my hand.

Niall grabbed the other and we started skating, the three of us, hand in hand. We skated for awhile, passing the others a couple of times and just having fun.

After about 10 minutes Zayn came along and stopped in front of us.

"Can I steal her for a bit?" he asked, only smiling at me.

Harry and Niall handed me to Zayn and laughed as they skated away together. We were finally alone, just how I wanted it to be. I had finally gotten used to the skates so I wasn't falling on my butt anymore.

Zayn and I skated side by side, not arm in arm, not even holding hands and that kind of disappointed me. I waited for him to grab my hand or something, but nothing.

We watched as Liam and Danielle passed by with his arm wrapped around her waist. She turned to face him and planted a huge kiss on his cheek and then he kissed her back on the lips.

The way they were kissing and how they looked at each other with love and passion was enough to make me jealous. I wished someone would love me like that, to actually care about me. I wouldn't know the feeling since I didn't have any family or friends to care about me.

I shifted my gaze from the intense make out scene to Zayn who was smiling down at me.

He was so beautiful. There was so many things I loved about him. His goofy smile, stunning brown eyes, cheekbones, how artistic he was, his amazing tattoos; everything about Zayn was beautiful. There was no way to explain how much Zayn meant to me, but when I saw myself in his eyes I knew I wasn't good enough for him.

He'd never fall for someone like me.

I realized how long I was staring in his eyes and turned away, trying to hide my dumb smile and blush.

"Don't do that. You look cute when you blush," said Zayn and lifted my chin so that I was facing him.

It made me blush even more and I could feel my face getting warmer. He was staring right into my eyes and inched closer to my face as if to kiss me.

Was he going to kiss me? I didn't know until our noses were almost touching and I could feel his hot breath on my face.

"Watch out for my body!" screamed Louis and crashed right into Zayn.

Way to ruin the moment, Louis.

I wasn't mad though. I laughed as Zayn and Louis were tangled in each other and spun around in uncontrollable circles on the ice. I laughed so hard that I started to cry even when they finally stopped and were now sitting on the ice. I've never laughed this hard in years and it felt so good.

Especially them. No one could make me laugh more than the boys could. They just made my life so much more worth it.

Before I knew it, Louis had grabbed my hand and pulled me onto him and Zayn on the ice where we all laughed our asses off. Louis pushed me onto Zayn's lap and he wrapped his arms around me as we all laughed until the others found us.

We all stood up, although it felt so nice in Zayn's arms, and decided to leave. Although I never had my chance to kiss Zayn, we did have a lot of fun.

"Where are we going now?" I asked as we piled into the black van.

Liam and Niall were riding shotgun while the rest of us sat in the back.

"It's a surprise," whispered Zayn in my ear and I smiled to myself.

It was a short drive and when I stepped out of the van my jaw dropped. I was standing right in front of the Empire State Building. I was excited; I've never been to the Empire State Building before.

"Whoa," I said as I looked up at the mighty building.

I couldn't believe how tall it was.

"Come on," said Zayn and he grabbed my hand and we all headed to the top of the building where the view was just breathtaking.

Everyone else leaned over the railing and looked over the city while I stood in a lonely corner. It was already really dark and the stars shined brightly as snow fell in flurries and I closed my eyes to enjoy the tranquility.

"What are you thinking about?" I opened my eyes and turned around to see Zayn.

I turned back to the city.

"Nothing. Just admiring this amazing view," I said.

"So am I," he said and I immediately turned around, but he was only looking at me.

I blushed again, but didn't break my gaze from Zayn's eyes. He pulled a small box out of his pocket and handed it to me.

"Merry Christmas, Sarah," he said with a smile. With my mouth gaping wide open in shock, I cautiously took the box from him and opened it. I was even more shocked than before. No one has ever given me a present before.

It was a necklace. It was a golden infinity sign with the word "Love" part of one of the loops of the sign. I could've screamed on the spot.

"Oh, my god! Zayn, I...I don't know what to say. No one's ever given me a present before."

He smiled even wider at my reaction and took the necklace out of the box. I automatically turned around so he could put it on. I felt his strong, rough hands make contact with my neck as he fiddled with putting on the necklace.

When he was done his hands rested on my shoulders and my skin burned under his touch as he rubbed at the back of my neck with his thumbs. His face was next to mine, his lips agains my ear.

"I'm still waiting for that kiss," he whispered in a low tone and mixed with his British accent made me melt.

I turned around to face him and he looked down at me with his sparkling brown eyes that were full of love and care. His hands were on my waist and then slid to the small of my back, pulling me closer while my my hands were on his chest. He leaned in closely until our noses were touching and our lips were so close.

His warm soft lips pressed gently against mine as they moved perfectly in sync. The kiss was long and languorous and so meaningful that I truly believed that Zayn cared for me. It just felt so right.

Our lips slowly parted and we just stared at the wonder that was each other. I've never been this happy in my whole life.

"I love you," he said in a whisper and I almost choked.

Did he really just say that? Judging by the bright smile on his face and the sincereness in his eyes, he meant it.

"I love you, too," I said in the most heartfelt way I could.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling as Zayn took my hand and squeezed it tightly as we made our way to the others, smiling even brighter than before. We decided to go back to my house since it was getting late, but just so he could drop me off.

When we found the boys Harry had his head hung low in defeat and Niall excitedly threw his hands up in the air.

"Whoo! Haha! Harry owes me 50 bucks!" yelled Niall and Zayn gave himself a face palm.

"What's going on? Did Zayn finally kiss her?!" exclaimed Louis as the others came along.

My face started to burn as I blushed.

"It's about time!" giggled Danielle and Eleanor.

"Shut up, guys," mumbled Zayn as he led me towards the exit.

"Bye, guys! I had a lot of fun today!" I yelled over my shoulder before Zayn pushed me through the door and closed it.

We walked all the way to the ice skating rink where Zayn left his motorcycle and he drove me home.

When we arrived at the apartment complex I took my helmet off and ran up to the apartment building door. I smiled at Zayn over my shoulder and gave him a smirk.

"You coming?" I asked.

I thought I'd have a little fun and I opened the door and ran up the stairs as I heard his footsteps following close behind me. I reached my door, but then Zayn grabbed me and pinned me against the wall next to my door and I giggled. We were both panting and trying to catch our breath.

"Got you," said Zayn still panting and moved his head right next to mine.

"Now you're mine," he whispered in my ear and I could feel his lips curve into a smirk against my ear.

His hands were on the brick wall to barricade me and he started to kiss my neck and I gasped in surprise. Zayn still hasn't ceased to surprise me and wrapped my arms around his neck to bring him closer.

He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me inside and all the way to my bed. He gently layed me on the bed and threw off his jacket before crawling on top of me. He ran his hands up and down my shirt as he frantically kissed me.

I was so new to this. I've never been in a relationship before so I wasn't used to someone touching me in such sexual ways. I didn't want to take it too far so I decided to go with it and see how far I really wanted to go, to experiment.

My hands reluctantly slid up his shirt, feeling his flat washboard stomach and receiving a small, satisfying moan from Zayn as he kissed me. I pulled his shirt over his head and threw it on the floor and put my hands back on his chest.

Zayn moaned against my mouth as his hands slithered around my waist and grabbed the hem of my shirt. He quickly pulled it over my head, but I stopped him. No one had ever seen me naked before or even without a shirt on. I was nervous as to how Zayn would react to my body.

What if he didn't like it? What if he didn't like me?

I quickly sat up and hugged my knees tightly against my chest. Zayn looked at me with a puzzled look on his face.

He reached for me, but I recoiled from his touch.

I shook my head.

"What about Perrie?" I whispered.

It had been on my mind all day and I didn't like the thought of Zayn using me. It felt wrong if he loved two women at the same time. I didn't want to be a part of it.

Zayn grabbed me and protectively wrapped his arms around me from behind. He leaned in closely to my face.

"Perrie's nothing to me," he whispered and my eyes grew wide.

I don't know why, but I believed him. I knew for a fact that I could trust Zayn and that he would never lie to me.

I turned around and planted a huge kiss on his lips and let him take my shirt and pants off this time. He was on top of me and ran his hands all over my body, over my breasts, down my stomach, over my arms and on my back.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered as he started to kiss up my stomach, leaving a trail of wet kisses, and reaching my lips once again.

I smiled when he kissed me. When he kissed me every worry in the world just faded away and it felt like it was just the two of us. Just how I wanted it to be.

As I layed in his arms that night I knew I had found my place. I snuggled into his chest and smiled to myself as his arms protectively tightened around me.

I just wanted to be with Zayn where he can hold me, protect me, and tell me he loves me.

I loved him.



Alright, sorry I took so long to update and this chapter was very long, but most of them will be! I also wanted to say that I have no hate on Zerrie or Perrie! Just trying to make the story interesting and more romantic. I actually love their relationship and they're so cute together. Like, Fav and Comment and I'll update soon!

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