Love, Loss, and Tattoos

(Note: This is my first FanFic and story that I'm posting on Wattpad so it might be crappy. Please be nice and bear with me here >~<) Sarah Bell has been through some really rough times, and she still does to this day. Her parents died when she was too young to remember and was put into many foster homes at a very young age. She ran away from her recent foster home at the age of 15. She is now 18 and lives in an old shabby apartment in New York City by herself where she struggles to survive and pay rent and can barley afford to take care of herself. But, on one fateful day, while roaming the streets of New York City, she meets a guy that will change the rest of her life forever. Good and bad. Nothing will ever be the same again for Sarah Bell. People will fall in love, hearts will be broken and tears will be shed.


18. Chapter 18

My eyes abruptly flew open but I immediately regretted when I was greeted with bright blinding light. I brought my hand up to cover my face and noticed there was needle stuck in my wrist. My head started to pound and I brought my hand to it only to find out that it was bandaged.

Everything from last night, every memory came flooding back and I became scared, nervous. I looked around the room to find Jill, Danielle and Eleanor sitting around my hospital bed. Jill was sitting in a chair right next to my bed and she had fallen asleep on the bed. I gently shook her awake and was relieved when she yawned.

Once she opened her eyes and her gaze fell on me a surprised expression took over her face.

"You're awake," she stated and I nodded. She gave me a gentle hug before shaking the others up.

"How're you feeling?" asked Danielle when everyone was wide awake and got their coffee. I cleared my throat before speaking.

"Fine," I said quietly in almost a whisper when, in fact, I really wasn't fine. I wasn't fine at all. The whole experience has left me scarred. I don't know if I'll ever be the same again. I fiddled with my fingers to avoid their eyes.

"So-" before Jill could continue the door flew open with a loud bang and I jumped in place. The heart monitor next to me started to beep faster. I gripped the blankets next to me very tightly in fear and anxiety.

Suddenly, five random guys burst into the room and towards my bed. I remembered the five guys who jumped me last night and...hurt me. They were probably the same guys coming to take me back and hurt me again just like last night.

I screamed and Jill rushed to my side while the girls tried to hold the guys back. I jumped out of the bed and cornered myself in the back of the room, cowering in the corner. I hugged my knees and buried my face in them as Jill tried to soothe me.

"Where is she?! Is she okay?! I need to see her!" yelled somebody. I started to cry.

"Stop it! You guys are scaring her!" yelled Eleanor. A large group of nurses came in the room an tried to calm everybody down. Everything was happening so quickly. There was screaming, yelling, and people were making so much commotion while I was on the floor crying, in fear of my life.

One of the guys ran towards me and I screamed bloody murder as he kneeled down in front of me. He reached out for my but I swatted his hands away.

"Stop it! Get away from me! Don't touch me!" I screamed. I didn't want it to happened again. I didn't want him to hurt me like he did last night. No. Please, not again.

The guy grabbed my arms and held them there in the air to stop my swatting.

"Sarah, stop! Look at me," he said softly and I suddenly recognize that voice. I cautiously opened my eyes. The man who kneeled down in front of me wasn't the evil man from last night. It was Zayn.

He was actually here. Zayn was here. I felt tears brimming my eyes and a small smile creep on my face.

"Zayn," I whispered and buried my face in his chest. I was still so terrified but when Zayn wrapped his arms around me and surrounded me by this warmth, I suddenly felt safe. I sobbed into his shirt, shaking uncontrollably. I hugged him even tighter, gripping tightly to his shirt. I was afraid he would slip away from me.

"Shh, it's okay, baby. I got you. It's okay. You're safe in my arms. I got you," whispered Zayn, repeating the words in my ear. He picked me up in his arms and carried me to the hospital bed. He layed me down gently and kissed me on the forehead and grabbed my hand.

The rest of the lads were standing by the doorway, waiting for the right moment. Harry was the first to approach me and stood on the other side of the bed. He still surprised me to this day.

The rest of the boys surrounded my bed along with the girls. They all stared at me, as if waiting for me to say something.

"What happened, Sarah?" asked Jill.

"Are you comfotable with telling us?" asked Zayn. I nodded unsurely and looked at the others. I took a deep breath and revisited the events of the past night. I let go of Zayn's hand and instead took hold of the blanket and twisted it in my hands.

"I was raped." I said it in a clear whisper but not very loudly. I thought nobody had heard me and I really didn't want to repeat myself. I didn't want to say those words again. I clenched the blanket tghter in my hands and held back the tears that dared to fall. I didn't want to be seen as weak.

It turns out that everybody did hear me and they were all taken aback and Zayn was the most shocked.

"Tell me you're lying," said Zayn on the brink of tears. I was already crying and wiped the tears away with the back of my hand.

"It's true," I said between a sob.

"Dammit!" hissed Zayn under his breath and turned around to punch the wall, leaving a decent sized hole.

"Is that where these came from?" asked Harry looking down at my arms which were covered in bruises and cuts. I nodded. Zayn turned back around and saw my arms as well. He gently grabbed my arm and stroked it in his hand.

"I can't believe it," said Jill.

"I'm gonna fucking kill whoever did this to you," growled Zayn and I hoped he wasn't being serious.

"Zayn, please calm down. I'm okay," I said, trying to calm him.

"No, it's not fucking okay. They raped you! They hurt you, Sarah," said Zayn lowering his tone at the end to a more hush one. He continued to caress my arm but I grabbed his hand and held it tightly in mine. He needed consoling more than I did right now.

"This is all my fault," said Jill out of the blue. We all turned to look at her.

"No, it's not," I said sternly and truthfully".

"Yes, it is! If I hadn't recommended going to that club in the first place then none of this would've happened! We could've been at your place right now watching TV and eating breakfast together, not some goddamn hospital!" Niall had wrapped his arms around her shoudlers as she sobbed into his chest. He rubbed cirlces in her back so he could try to calm her down a little.

"Jill, it's not your fault. It's nobodies fault. Shit happenes and sometimes we can't do anything about it. We learn to live with it and accept it. Like I'm going to right now."

There was a pause in the room. All that could be heard was Jill's faint and ongoing sobs coming from Niall's chest. Not another word was spoken from everybody and they all settled down. It was finally quiet in the room and I sighed.

Just when I thought I could have some peace and quiet for awhile, the door to the room flew open and a Doctor followed by a nurse walked in.

"Hi, how's everyone doing in here?" asked the doctor with a smile. We all mumbled out a few replies.

"How about you?" he asked looking at me.

"Fine," I mumbled.

"Well, I just wanted to read your reprort for you. You have minor bruises all over you rbody that will heal over time and cuts, mostly on your face and arms that will need anti-bacterial cream but will also heal over time. We patched up a large gash you have on the top of your head and have perscribed painkillers for that. Your whole whole body is extremely sore and you should stay in bed for ahwile, maybe a week. And that looks like everything although we have no information on what caused all of this damage to your body since you were unconcious when you arrived at the hospital and your friends found you."

Eeveryone turned their attention to me. I couldn't lie to the doctor, especially about a situation like this. So I decided to tell the doctor everything making sure not to leave out any details. The whole time he wrote on his clipboard that he had brought in with him.

"We'll be sure to notify the police about this and you're also free to go. Take care," said the doctor and he exited the room with the nurse close behind.

"Did any of you bring me clothes to change into?" I asked. All that was on my mind was going home and laying in bed with Zayn all day. That's all I wanted right now.

Jill's eyes grew wide in realization and she looked at the girls. It was obvious that they didn't bring me any clothes and I definitely didn't want to wear the clothes from last night.

"Uhhh..." started Jill but I cut her off.

"It's fine. I'll just leave in the hospital gown. No worries." Zayn helped me out of bed and into a wheelchair and wheeled me all the way to the van. The ride home was smooth and quiet, nobody spoke again.

Zayn helped me step out of the van but once I had both feet on the ground my knees buckeld and Zayn grabbed me before I fell on the ground. My body was so sore and in so much pain that I couldn't even stand by myself. Zayn picled me up bridal style and carried me into the house and all the way into our room. I could hear the others footsteps as they piled into the house.

Zayn gently and carefully layed me down on the bed and pulled the blanket over my body. I admired how sweet and caring he was. I loved him so much.

"Is that good? Are you comfortable?" he asked worryingly with concern. I nodded.

"Yeah, but I'd be more comfortable if you were in bed with me," I said with a big cheeky grin on my face. Zayn shook his head and chuckled to himself before joining me in bed. I carefully scooted over and turned around to face him so I could see his beautiful face. He was, in fact, smiling at me with that toothy grin that I loved so much.

"I'm glad you're okay," said Zayn. "You had me so worried." He cupped my face with one hand and stroked my cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"I know. And I'm sorry for making you worry so much."

"Don't be sorry. It's all that bastards fault for...doing what he did to you. If there's anyone to blame then it's that asshole." I cupped Zayn's face with both hands and brought him closer to mine.

"I know, I know but let's please not talk about long are you staying?" It's been on my mind since I left the hospital. I knew the band hadn't finished the rest of their tour so they had to leave soon, but when?

"Well, we had to cancel a few shows so we could come and visit you in the hospital and we still have a lot of shows to do. I'd say the longest we can stay is a week."

I have him a small nod and looked down, away from his gaze. A week wasn't very long and after what happened I didn't want to be alone or away from Zayn. I was scared.

Zayn gave me a tiny nod back and wrapped his arms around my waist very slowly and gently. It only hurt a little bit but it was bearable.

"Don't worry, I'll make the best of it."

He pulled my body until I was against his and I had my hands on the back of his neck, tugging at the hair. He dipped his head into the crook of my neck and I felt his soft and lucious lips on my ear.

"You know, I just can't stand the thought of somebody other than me touching you...or fucking you," he whispered and kissed my neck, sucking on the skin. I gasped at the sudden act of affection and his choice of words. Only Zayn could turn me on that quickly and make me feel this way.

His lips trailed up my neck and stopped at the corner of my mouth. He lightly grazed his lips over mine and a small smile creeped on my face. I desperately wanted his lips on mine and I couldn't wait any longer. My patience was wearing thin.

His lip sfinally contacted mine and I felt a rush of relief and joy come over me. It had been so long and I missed him. I missed his touch, his kiss, his smile, his laugh. I missed him.

Zayn's hand traveled down my body in a smooth and swift motion, caressing every inch and curve. I wanted more, so much more but I needed time to recover. For now we would just have to settle with kisses.

Before Zayn tried to go further I parted from his lips and gazed into his breathtakingly beautiful eyes.

"Don't worry we can have much more fun when I'm fully recovered," I said playfully with a flirty smirk. Zayn's eyes went wide and then he chuckled before giving me a kiss on the forehead. I shifted my body so he could spoon me and he wrapped an arm around my waist.

"Definitely. I love you," whispered Zayn in my ear and I couldn't stop smiling. I missed it when he said that. I also missed being in Zayn's arms again. I felt safe and I knew he would protect me. I knew it because he loved me.

"I love you too."

I closed my eyes and let sleep take over as I drfted into a deep sleep.

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