I was curled up in a corner of my bed, up against the wall, rocking myself.
We had to tell mum and James tomorrow. I had never been so nervous in my life. I wasn't counting on getting much sleep.
I wasn't particularly bothered about James reaction, but what about mum's?
I had no real friends so far in my life. Mum was the only one I had some form of relationship with for all these years. I care about Mum, and I care about what she thinks.. What if she thinks that we're doing something wrong like Lacey?
Then, my door creaked open.
It was mum. She sat beside me, and I held my tears back.
"How are you doing?" She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, and I buried into her.
"Good" I said softly. "Congratulations on the engagement.. didn't really get to say it the other day."
"Thanks" she smiled. "Was Hugo okay then?"
"You get on so well with him."
I nodded again.
"How's life going? I've been so busy, I've barely been able to see you."
Lets try a stage one, if you will, of the "telling process".
"When.. When you were dating dad, why did you stay with him when everyone else disapproved?"
She smiled, looking dreamy.
"I loved your dad. Even at fifteen, I knew that I loved him. A few people saying no wouldn't change how I felt."
She paused, seeming to think.
"Why do you ask?"
"I..Um..I was just.. Curi- uh, wondering" I stuttered. "I'd.. Hate to pick between you and someone I love."
Mum hugged me tight.
"Babe, that'll never happen, no matter who it is."
I sat at the table, nibbling on some toast. The time to spill the story of Hugo and I's relationship blossoming over the past month and a half was looming, and I was terrified.
Clodagh slipped quietly into the seat beside me.
"Good morning" I shakily smiled.
"Lacey says she doesn't like you anymore, and that I shouldn't either" she said softly, but bluntly.
I felt my head recoil, been taken aback. I didn't think Lacey would spread poison to her little sister.
"Why?" I asked, surprised at the feelings of hurt I had. I should be used to this.
"She says that you're a stupid, manipulative slut."
I bit my cheeks, trying to prevent myself from getting upset and angry. But then I let it out in a deep breath. It wasn't Clodagh's fault.
"I said you weren't" I mumbled. "I said that you were nice, and kind, and Hugo and I really really liked you. Then she yelled at me." Her lip trembled. I awkwardly rubbed her shoulder, feeling sorry for her. She was only thirteen. She didn't need all this. Lacey shouldn't have dragged her into all this mess.
"We just had an argument, Clodagh, and Lacey's a bit annoyed at me. It'll all be sorted out today, I promise."