Each second I stood there watching the more my heart broke. That could've been me. I could've been making her laugh. Could've been kissing her pouty lips. But instead, I'm a dick who didn't know what he had until it was gone. I never noticed how much I really loved Sandra until it became a year and I was miserable without her. I lied to the boys that I was just homesick. But truthfully, it was Sandra. I've missed her so much. When I opened the door and saw her. I knew I had to tell her how I felt, but then her mum cut me off. Next she was taken away by the mums, after that the boys had taken her away. Lastly Louis had decided that she was gonna be his all night so when I grabbed her away I was in a jealous rage cause everyone was stealing what was rightfully mine.
When she ran out and Louis and I had that confrontation I had ran to the only place I knew would somewhat help me feel better. It was our place. Sandra and Niall. Not Sandra, Louis, and Niall. But now it seemed like I had been excluded, kicked out. It now had became Sandra and Louis. Louis and Sandra. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. My everything is gone. But I'm not gonna let her go without a fight!
I walked down the path and over to the laughing pair. I cleared my throat. They looked up at me and Louis glared. I gulped. You can do this. "Sandra can we talk?" I ask, my voice didn't sound like mine. It was small, quiet, and sounded so sad. "I don't think that's a good idea." Louis shook his head. "Please." I begged.
He opened his mouth to say something but Sandra spoke up. "Sure." Louis climbed off her and she sat up. I offered her my hand but she rejected it, helping herself. "Still rejecting my help I see." I joke. She lets out a small laugh as we walk over to a big tree.
"Look San, I never meant to hurt you back at the house or a year ago, I honestly didn't know what to say, I mean we were friends since we were born, literally since the day you came home we were hanging out." She laughed and I smiled.
"So when something like what you said it took me back. I mean I never really thought of you like that and well I did maybe when I was like three then school came and I found out girls are icky." She laughed again.
"Sure it took me a year to realize that I love you and all but I do. I get jealous when I see you with Louis cause I know that could be me if I hadn't fucked up but I did and I'm so sorry so basically what I'm trying to say is…you're not icky." She laughs.
"Ya know I thought you were gonna be all sweet then I remembered you're Niall Horan." I laughed. I glanced at Louis to find him glaring at me. I turned back to Sandra. "Hey I remember this tree!" She squealed.
I spied a carving on the tree.
I smiled. "Didn't I pee on this tree?" I ask. We both take a step back. "I miss my best friend." She pouts. "I miss mine too." I say. She opens her arms and I gladly enter them. "Hey Niall." She whispers. "Yeah?" "I don't think your icky either." We both laughed.
We pull apart. "Now what?" She asks. "Well I'm pretty sure our mum's are worried sick so grab Louis and let's go but I have ask you something first." She looks up at me. "Do you have feelings for Louis?" I ask. "Yeah, I kinda do." I smile weakly as the last bits of my heart shatter. "Go for it." She smiles and runs over to Louis.
I start walking back up the path. This sucks. I fought for her and I still lost. I guess I really fucked up this time.