I breathe out. Peeta stares at me with concern. I gulp.
"...I'm going to go with Gale and Cinna. I'll be fine. I swear..."
Peeta looks down at his hands. His hands are very broad. His jaw tightens, and my heart races.
I reach over and grab both his hands in mine, and I kiss them. He smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. It's not like Peeta to look like this, he is usually so... Happy.
This is the most painful thing about leaving. Leaving Peeta and the kids. Wounding him much more than the Capitol ever could.
Tears threaten to fall from my eyes. I take another deep breath.
"All we are doing is catching President Snow's daughter. It's not like there will be a war or anything,"
I wipe a year away with the sleeve of my sweatshirt.
He stands from where he was sitting -the kitchen table- and walks over to me. He kisses me on the cheek lightly.
"I just don't want to loose you," he whispers. He lifts my chin up so my lips reach his mouth.
"It nearly killed me. When I finally started to remember things. The way I treated you..." He was crying, "I was the mutt."
I crush my lips against his. I pull away, just to speak. "No, no. Peeta it was not your fault." This makes him cry more, like a child missing his mother.
He sits back down on the hard wooden chair and I sit on his lap. He cradles me, though I'm not sure I'm the one that needed cradling. I dig my face into his chest and let out a weep. "Just searching Peeta. You won't loose me. I swear. I'll always be here. Always."
He pushes his arm under my legs and behind my back, carrying me like a baby.