Since the day at the barn when I watched the video, I've tried my hardest to remember everything that happened that day. It's harder now that school has started back up after summer break. Somehow, word has gotten around about my accident. I remember being bullied at school near my dad's house, but never here. Now, as I walk through the hallways, people stare at me like I have two heads. One girl even came up to me in class, laughing.
"Hey Kristen. I jut wanted to ask you a question about our math homework, oh wait, I forgot, you lost your memory!" She says, walking away with a huge smirk on her face.
"How's you boyfriend, Liam? I heard he's dating you because he feels bad for you and is getting paid to do it. I'm not surprised, you really are worthless and the ugliest person I've ever seen. I actually think thing fits you better than person. Maybe I'll call you the Thing." another girl says, laughing at her own non-funny joke.
"You're just jealous that Liam isn't dating you. We're both happy and he isn't getting paid to date me. I don't think meeting him on a plane would be like, 'oh, see that girl in front of you? I'll pay you to date her.' Grow up and think before you speak," I say, although there's some other things I would rather say.
"I think you're the one who needs to grow up and open your eyes. You're so delirious and stupid. See you around, bitch," she says, laughing and opening her water bottle. I'm about to turn around when I feel a sudden coldness on my head. I can feel water dripping off my hair and on to my shirt and shorts soaking them, then look up to see the girl laughing with an empty water bottle in her hand. I just turn around and walk to class.
When I walk in, everyone is staring and starts laughing at me. I ignore them and walk straight up to the teacher, trying hard not to give into the sudden feeling that I'm going to cry.
"May I go to the bathroom to get cleaned up. Someone...uh...accidentally spilled their water bottle on me," I say, too afraid to tell her the real reason.
"Yes, go ahead Kristen, but hurry back as soon as you can," she says and I quickly walk out before I can make out what everyone is saying about me.
I rush to my locker and grab a change of clothes that I luckily brought then run to the bathroom as I feel the urge to cry build. I wish Erin and Cailey were here but we don't have class together this period. I walk into the bathroom and into one of the stalls to change. I get changed them walk back to class. Throughout the day, I've gotten more people come up and make fun of me and each one breaks my heart more and more. I finally get home to find Liam and run up to him. He wraps his arms around me as I start to cry.
"Hey babe, whats wrong?" Liam asks and I can hear the worry in his voice.
"I had a horrible day at school today. people were making fun of me for dating you and one girl dumped her water bottle on my head. I can't do this anymore. I used to only be bullied at my dads but now people are telling me that I'm worthless and shouldn't be dating you. Word has also gotten around about my accident and that's just another to make fun you. There's also a rumor that you're getting paid to date me. Is that true?" I ask, praying to God that it isn't.
"Don't listen to them. They're all wrong and do you honestly believe that I would date you for money? I would never do that to you Kristen. Trust me," he says and I really do. In that moment I decide something that I never would have expected. It breaks my heart on what I'm about to do and even though I trust him, I think I have to do this. He doesn't deserve this but I think it's the only way for me to get my memory back and relieve some of the stress. It takes everything in me to say it.
"I do trust you Liam, but maybe we should take a break for a little. I don't think I can handle much more of this right now. Plus, you're going on tour so we won't get to see each other much," I say, more tears streaming down my face. I look up at him to see the shock on his face as he registers what I just said. That's when I see the tears brimming his eyes and one escapes down his cheek, which kills me.
"No...no no no no, please don't do this! We can work this out! I promise you, we will. And will come visit you whenever I can," he says and I know he's right, but I also know that I can't give up now.
" Liam, I don't want to do this, believe me, but right now I think it's for the best. Maybe, one day we can try again, but I don't think I have any chance of getting my memory back with this much stress. Maybe I'm not the right girl for you. You'll find a beautiful girl that will treat you how you should and never even think of doing what I am now. You don't deserve this at all and none of this is your fault," I say, wiping away his tears as mine fall freely.
"Kristen, please don't do this! I'll do anything and there is no other girl. It's only you, that's all I want," he says and there is so much pain in his eyes.
"Liam I'm so sorry. This breaks my heart but I don't see any other way. I just... Can you promise me one thing? Please don't hate me," I say, looking down. He gently lifts my chin up, making me look into his eyes.
"I could never hate you Kristen. Yeah, I'm upset but it's impossible to hate someone like you. I wish we didn't have to end like this, actually I wish we didn't have to end at all, but if you think it's for the best, I'll do it for you. I really hope you get your memory back because I know how had it is for you. I'm practically a stranger who says that I dated you for months. I would think you're crazy if our positions were switched. I just hope someday, you'll change your mind because I don't think this is how it ends. Can you promise me one thing too? At we will still be friends, even after this. Maybe we can't be in a relationship, but I can't lose you all together," he says and that breaks my heart even more. The fact that he would do this for me and give up everything for me. I know I'm making a mistake but I can't do this right now. The saying goes, if you love someone, let them go and if it was meant to be they'll always come back.
"Of course, Liam," I say and he doesn't say anymore, just nods and walks out. I turn towards the door to see Erin and Cailey standing there, mouths wide open.
"Did you just...oh my god. Kristen, I love you and all but that was probably the most stupid thing you could ever do. He loved you and he fought for you when everyone else had given up and you just threw it all away. I think you made a huge mistake," Erin says and Cailey nods.
"I agree with Erin. We get hate too but you can't let it get to you like this. I think you just ruined the best thing you ever had and someone you really needed," Cailey says and that hurts me even more. My best friends aren't even on my side anymore.
"Thanks guys. That is exactly what I needed to hear. I already know I made a mistake ok? You don't have to rub it in but I seriously can't deal with it all right now. It breaks my heart but I really do think he will find the right girl for him," I say, looking down at my hands.
"We're not trying to make you feel bad, but I do think the right girl is you. I know that in the end, you will get back together I just know it. How about you go get some sleep. It's been a long day," Erin says, pulling me up and leading me to my room. I walk into my room and get changed once the girls leave then get into bed.
>>>>>>>A month later<<<<<<<<
The last few weeks in school have been the same as before. People continue to make fun of me but not as much, luckily. I do get blamed for the breakup but that part is true. I cant believe its already been a month and I miss him more than anything. I haven't talked to him or the boys since. There's rumors going around about him dating this other girl named Emily. I doubt they're true though. Could he really get over me that quickly? When I get home, I run up to my room and close the door as tears start streaming down my face and I log into twitter for the first time since the break up. I don't know why, well actually I do, but I go right to Liam's page. I see a tweet from the day of the breakup and read through it:
@Real_Liam_Payne: you guys take this hate way too far. Go ahead and hate on me but not the people I care about. I hope you're happy now haters. I lost the one I care about the most because of you. Thank you to all the true fans who respected the relationship. I love you guys
This brought fresh tears to my eyes and I look through the comments to see hash tags trending worldwide like: #directionersaresorry #wewantKiamback #sorryliam#sorrykristen
My notifications were blowing up to with tweets saying that they were sorry and still some hate, plus a few from the boys:
@Katy_Is_A_Directioner: I can't believe @Real_Liam_Payne and @KristenBlank16 broke up! They were perfect together! #wewantKiamback
@Twerking_1D: I love you @KristenBlank16 you're so pretty and can I please be you? You and Liam were so perfect together and I really hope you can get back together #wewantkiamback #directionersaresorry #otp
@KristenBlank13: @Twerking_1D thank you :) it really means a lot but sadly I don't think that's going to happen soon :( sorry babe
@Louis_Tomlinson: come over to Starbucks @KristenBlank16. We are going to have a little four on one chat with Dr.Louis, Niall, Harry, and Zayn. You better come or we will show up at your house and drag you there. I know where you live
@KristenBlank16: I'd like to see you try @Louis_Tomlinson
@Louis_Tomlinson: oh I will
@HarryStyles: we miss you already Krissy Do what Louis says or else...@KristenBlank16
@KristenBlank16: nah and I see you're threatening me now and Krissy? When did you come up with that? @HarryStyles
@HarryStyles: @Kristenblank13 oh a few minutes ago
I keep scrolling through mentions and see a bunch of edits of Liam and I together and then some about the break up. Tons of people seemed upset about it, which made me feel bad. I scream when four boys burst into my room and jump onto my bed.
"I told you we would come and find you. What is this hard thing under my bum?" He asks, looking down.
"That would be my leg and you're crushing it," I say, wiggling my leg.
"Oh sorry love, I'll move," he says moving off of my leg to sit next to me, leaning against the head rest. "So we heard what happened. Liam is devastated as you already know."
"Yeah I do and I feel horrible but it's for the best," I say, trying not to cry. Louis wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. I feel him nod toward Niall who sighs.
"This may be hard for you to understand and it's ok if you're upset, I just want to tell you that before I start. When Liam is upset, he sometimes doesn't think straight and does stupid things. Well, that is kinda what happened. He has had a crush on this girl since grade school and asked her out 22 times, rejected every time. Well, now she likes him back and he asked her out again last week," Niall says, taking a deep breath before continuing, "well, she said yes. I don't know if he really does like her or if he's just doing it to try to get over you, but he announced it in an interview yesterday."
"Is he happy with her?" I ask, and they all look at me like I'm crazy so I repeat myself, "is he?"
"Surprisingly, he kind of is. I'm sure he's still upset, but he seems genuinely happy with her. I'm really sorry Kristen," Harry says, giving me a hug.
"Don't be. I'm happy that he found someone and I just want him to be happy, even if its not with me," I say, looking at all the boys.
"You're not upset?" Zayn asks and Louis smacks his arm, glaring at him.
"Of course I'm upset, but maybe we just weren't meant to be," I say and they nod.
"Do you want to go out to dinner with us and the girls. Liam is going to be thereof you can ignore him and just talk to us if you want," Louis asks and I nod.
"Sure, I think I need to get out of the house for a little bit," I say, before getting up. This will be difficult but I have to get used to it. Louis links my arm in his and we skip downstairs and to the car. I know that through it all, I still have Louis, one of the best guy friends I could ever ask for.
We pull up to an Italian restaurant and sit at a table for 9. The girls show up and lastly, Liam and Emily. I'm sitting next to Louis and Erin, while Liam is at the other side of the table, holding hands with Emily. I make eye contact with him for a second and his eyes looked pained but I look away quickly. We order out food and turn to get a spoonful of tomato sauce on my face, thanks to Louis.
"Louis! You got sauce all over my face!" I say, laughing at him and wiping the sauce off.
"Oh yeah? Well you got face all over my sauce!" He says and we both start cracking up. I start coughing and try to take a drink, then pretty much choke on the water. "Oh no, Kristen don't die! Superman to he rescue!"
That makes me laugh harder and he hits my back to stop me from choking. By now, half the restaurant was looking at us so we quiet down.
"Well, now that we got that all settled and you stopped chocking, how's your riding going Kristen?" Harry asks, looking at me.
"Its going great! I'm back to jumping finally and good as new from before the accident. My concussion symptoms have been starting to go away and I'm going to be back to showing soon. I can't wait," I say, smiling like an idiot. I was so excited when the doctor said I could officially ride again.
"You ride horses? How? They're disgusting and they smell and are mean," Emily retorts, scrunching her face up. I can't believe she just said that.
"Actually, no, they're not mean, unless you do something to them. They also are not disgusting and don't smell. Have you ever ridden a horse?" I ask, angry now.
"No and I don't want to...ever," she says and something about her smirk makes me even more angry.
"Well, don't judge them before you've ever ridden them please, they're actually really sweet," I say, trying to keep calm for Liam's sake. I feel someone's hand on my shoulder and turn to see Louis, giving me a comforting look.
"So I heard that you're Liam's ex. May I ask why you two broke up?" She asks and I see Liam freeze beside her, his hand now non moving from rubbing hers. The room becomes tense until Louis speaks up.
"I don't think that's important Emily. I don't think they want to talk about it," Louis says, and I give him a grateful look.
"We'll, it's been a month, I think they should be able to and I want to make sure Liam didn't do anything," she says, staring at me.
"Ok, I'll tell it. I was in an accident and lost my memory. After that I had forgotten about Liam and I's relationship but he asked me out agin and I agreed. When school started, I got bullied for dating him and because of my memory loss. I broke up with Liam, thinking it would get better and relieve the stress, but it only hurt me and I get bullied for breaking up with him. He did nothing wrong. Any girl is lucky to have him because he is an amazing guy, so you better treat him well," I say and look over to Liam and Emily, who are both staring at me and Emily's eyes soften for a second.
"Kristen, I didn't know. I-" Liam starts, but I interrupt him.
"No, Liam. It's ok, really. You actually look happy with Emily and I'm happy for you. Plus, I'm used to the bullying from school at my dad's house, so it's ok," I say and Liam face is even more pained.
"You're still being bullied?" He asked, clearly upset.
"Yeah, I am but please don't worry about me," I say, starting to get up. "I have to go. My mom just texted me. I'll see you guys soon. Text me if you want to hang out or talked, especially on tour. I'll have no one to talk to and Louis, I can use some of your jokes."
"Oh, so we're no ones now?" Erin jokes and I laugh and playfully smack her arm.
"You know what I mean Erin. Of course I have you girly girls. I'll see you back at the house. I know you want to spend some time with your boyfriends before they go on tour," I say, starting to walk away.
"Wait, Kristen. I can give you a ride so you don't have to walk," Liam says but before I can respond, Louis starts to stand up.
"No, that's ok. I got it. You stay here with Emily," he says, linking our arms together like earlier.
"But-" Liam starts, but I cut him off.
"Louis is right. Don't you want to spend time with Emily before you go on tour?" I ask.
"She's coming with us," Liam says, quietly.
"Oh, well it's ok. Louis offered and that would be rude to leave her," I say, walking away. I'm happy when he doesn't try to stop me.
"Thanks Louis. I was not looking forward to a car ride with him. Wh would he want to leave Emily to take me home?" I ask him.
"Isn't it quite obvious love? He still likes you and when you mentioned the bullying, he was really upset. You could tell. And I'm sorry Emily was such a bitch to you. I think everyone saw it but Liam, or he did and didn't say anything about it," Louis says. This is exactly why he's my best friend.
"Thanks Louis, but it's ok. I'll deal with it as long as Liam is happy. I want him to forget about the pain. I just wish he kept his promise to stay friends. I've texted him and he doesn't reply," I say and Louis looks at me shocked.
"Liam hasn't said anything about you texting him and believe me, he would if you had. I have seen Emily with his phone multiple times. Do you think she's deleting the messages before he can see them?" He asks and I suddenly get really upset.
"That bitch! What if she is and all this time I thought Liam was ignoring me which he could if he did like Emily, maybe she didn't want him texting other girls so he didn't respond but ugh. I don't know why she hates me," I say.
"She's jealous. I think she's aware of how Liam feels about you. He sometimes says it out loud without thinking while shes there. She wants him to like her, but honestly, I think she just wants fame and doesn't really like him," he says and I feel bad for Liam. He likes a girl that might not like him back.
Hey guys. I hope you enjoy the longer chapter. I really like them together, but the story was getting boring and I had to keep it going. I hope you all like it so far and any ideas would be great. Who do you ship? Kiam or whatever a ship name for Louis and Kristen is or Liam and Emily. Comment, vote, and fan please. I love reading the comments and ill update as soon as I can. Thanks :)